Haiku Club Challenge Multi-Author
Viewing comments for Chapter 16 "haiku (field of poppies)"A collection of haiku written by FanStory Poets
21 total reviews
Comment from l.raven
HI Queen of Haiku, I would love to have been the one taking the picture...but I could hear the Poppies singing in the summer breeze...I love your poem sweet girl...and love your picture...very nicely written my sweet friend...love to ya Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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HI Queen of Haiku, I would love to have been the one taking the picture...but I could hear the Poppies singing in the summer breeze...I love your poem sweet girl...and love your picture...very nicely written my sweet friend...love to ya Linda xxoo
Comment Written 02-Apr-2017
reply by the author on 02-Apr-2017
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Thank you, sweetie pie, love you!
namaste,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Fanstory Instructor and poet
Member of the Haiku Society of America
~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
<>o<> Haiku 201 starts on April 5th<>o<>
~<>o<> Haiga starts on May 1st <>o<>~
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you are so very welcome...xxoo love ya you
Comment from nuthead
Beautiful!
Great visual imagery, the field of poppies rustling in a summer breeze. Great auditory imagery as well. I've never heard of the word "susurrus" until today. It can almost act as an Onomatopoeia! Can you hear the poppies rustling, susurrus...susurrus...susurrus.... ha! Beautiful work.
"field of poppies
speaks volumes in the summer breeze--
susurrus"
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2017
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Beautiful!
Great visual imagery, the field of poppies rustling in a summer breeze. Great auditory imagery as well. I've never heard of the word "susurrus" until today. It can almost act as an Onomatopoeia! Can you hear the poppies rustling, susurrus...susurrus...susurrus.... ha! Beautiful work.
"field of poppies
speaks volumes in the summer breeze--
susurrus"
Comment Written 28-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2017
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Thank you very much, my dear friend,
namaste,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Fanstory Instructor and poet
Member of the Haiku Society of America
~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
<>o<> Haiku 201 starts on April 5th<>o<>
~<>o<> Haiga starts on May 1st <>o<>~
Comment from Hitcher
Ok you got me, i had no idea what susurrus meant unil i read your notesð??? i did enjoy your haiku friend, i hav a question though and it is NOT a critigue but im just looking at the accomianying art work and thinking color...could you have said -
Red poppie field
Thus adding color to the visual. Like i said friend, just a thoughtð???ð???ð???
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2017
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Ok you got me, i had no idea what susurrus meant unil i read your notesð??? i did enjoy your haiku friend, i hav a question though and it is NOT a critigue but im just looking at the accomianying art work and thinking color...could you have said -
Red poppie field
Thus adding color to the visual. Like i said friend, just a thoughtð???ð???ð???
Comment Written 28-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2017
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thank you, my friend, red poppy field is nice too. :)
namaste,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Comment from Jackarrie
Hi Gypsy
I love poppies I tend to paint fields of them for family and friends, I enjoyed your haiku and learned a new word susurrus
4-8-3 a
are the syllable count is this ok with haiku,
Mary
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2017
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Hi Gypsy
I love poppies I tend to paint fields of them for family and friends, I enjoyed your haiku and learned a new word susurrus
4-8-3 a
are the syllable count is this ok with haiku,
Mary
Comment Written 28-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 28-Mar-2017
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yes, Japanese haiku form is 5/7/5 but English is a different language and the count can't be the same. 4/8/3 is okay.
click here for more information
thank you my friend,
namaste,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
Oh, yes... You are Spanish, Gypsy. We should have guessed, that's where the exotica comes in. LOL ravishing red poppies for a ravishing woman! Your haiku is lovely... How do you pronounce the last word, the Satori?
I just wrote a composition LOL to Kerry. Personification is not allowed in haiku, right? Also, pictures are not encouraged as a haiku should stand alone and be a strong message without a picture, am I right? I told her to ask you as you are the teacher, and I think rules for modern English language haiku are changing, right? Thanks, and sorry to write another composition, Giddy :))
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Oh, yes... You are Spanish, Gypsy. We should have guessed, that's where the exotica comes in. LOL ravishing red poppies for a ravishing woman! Your haiku is lovely... How do you pronounce the last word, the Satori?
I just wrote a composition LOL to Kerry. Personification is not allowed in haiku, right? Also, pictures are not encouraged as a haiku should stand alone and be a strong message without a picture, am I right? I told her to ask you as you are the teacher, and I think rules for modern English language haiku are changing, right? Thanks, and sorry to write another composition, Giddy :))
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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[suh-tawr-ee, -tohr-ee] sa to ri.
Haiku is a 300 years old Japanese poetry and Waka, all Japanese poetry, has been around for 1300 years so some discrepancies are bound to happen. Also, there are many different styles. The one you subscribe to is called sashei, based on pure observation.
Haiku is a visual poetic form, imagistic, and tied to visual art from the beginning. All the Masters used art with their poetry. Matsuo Basho founded the first haiga school so it is perfectly fine to use pictures or paintings with haiku. The Masters did it, why not us?
Portrait of Matsuo Bashō by Yokoi Kinkoku, c. 1820. The calligraphy relates one of Bashō's most famous haiku poems: Furu ike ya / kawazu tobikomu / mizu no oto (An old pond / a frog jumps in / the sound of water).
personification is allowed and used for centuries in Japan. One of the four Haiku Masters in Japan, Issa, used it all the time.
The snow is melting
and the village is flooded
with children.
by Issa
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Thanks for that, Gypsy. It seems my four courses have been a waste of time and I will need to update my knowledge. (when I can afford it) Thanks again, Giddy
Comment from krys123
Gypsy;
-the use of the word "field: and the term "speaks and volumes" is very inventive double entender which goes really well as a descriptive venue of the 1st 2 grammatically connected lines.
-The satori word susurrus" is new to me and it is a beautiful and perfect word that explains and expresses the nature and the conceptual theme of your haiku offering an aha moment and suggesting the relativity of this contextual theme.
-The picture's definitely also relative to the meaning of this poem or haiku.
-Beautifully done and thank you for sharing and take care and have a good one especially with the one that you love.
Alex
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Gypsy;
-the use of the word "field: and the term "speaks and volumes" is very inventive double entender which goes really well as a descriptive venue of the 1st 2 grammatically connected lines.
-The satori word susurrus" is new to me and it is a beautiful and perfect word that explains and expresses the nature and the conceptual theme of your haiku offering an aha moment and suggesting the relativity of this contextual theme.
-The picture's definitely also relative to the meaning of this poem or haiku.
-Beautifully done and thank you for sharing and take care and have a good one especially with the one that you love.
Alex
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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thank you
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
field of poppies
speaks volumes in the summer breeze--
susurrus
I like the way you've described the poppies speaking in the breeze
- whispers of nature - so lovely, Gypsy - and I love the presentation.
Margaret
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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field of poppies
speaks volumes in the summer breeze--
susurrus
I like the way you've described the poppies speaking in the breeze
- whispers of nature - so lovely, Gypsy - and I love the presentation.
Margaret
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Thank you very much, my dear friend,
namaste,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Fanstory Instructor and poet
Member of the Haiku Society of America
~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
<>o<> Haiku 201 starts on April 5th<>o<>
~<>o<> Haiga starts on May 1st <>o<>~
Comment from Mark Valentine
"Susurrus", like "tintinnabulation" is one of those words that seems as if were made for poetry. Poppies also, thanks to John McCrae, seem to automatically put one in a poetic frame of mind. The pacific nature of the picture, the thought of poppies, the summer breeze, and the word "susurrus" all create a calming, peaceful effect. Love it.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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"Susurrus", like "tintinnabulation" is one of those words that seems as if were made for poetry. Poppies also, thanks to John McCrae, seem to automatically put one in a poetic frame of mind. The pacific nature of the picture, the thought of poppies, the summer breeze, and the word "susurrus" all create a calming, peaceful effect. Love it.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Thank you very much, my dear friend,
namaste,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Fanstory Instructor and poet
Member of the Haiku Society of America
~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
<>o<> Haiku 201 starts on April 5th<>o<>
~<>o<> Haiga starts on May 1st <>o<>~
Comment from Rasmine
Hello :)
This paints an image without the photo. Bright red flowers are whistling in the wind and blowing. Because I'm writing Flower Power, now they have faces and are really whistling. LOL!
I have a question: It's less than 17 syllables, but it doesn't follow the 5 7 5? Because your second line has eight syllables. Maybe I'm getting messed up with other poems.
TC
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Hello :)
This paints an image without the photo. Bright red flowers are whistling in the wind and blowing. Because I'm writing Flower Power, now they have faces and are really whistling. LOL!
I have a question: It's less than 17 syllables, but it doesn't follow the 5 7 5? Because your second line has eight syllables. Maybe I'm getting messed up with other poems.
TC
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Thank you very much, my dear friend,
namaste,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Fanstory Instructor and poet
Member of the Haiku Society of America
~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
<>o<> Haiku 201 starts on April 5th<>o<>
~<>o<> Haiga starts on May 1st <>o<>~
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Wish I could afford the classes, but I need to save for an air conditioner. I need that for my health--I know sounds silly. I'm now in the 'sensitive' group for bad air. So, sometimes when I am a prisoner in my apartment, which is a lot in the summer, I will write. Hey, see you tonight :)
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no worries, i totally understand, i don't have a lot of money left after i pay all the bills... sigh
you can ask me for help anytime at the club or via private message
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Yeah, bills...bills...bills--argh! :P
See you tonight!
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okay
Comment from Mark Schardine
susurruses= a soft murmuring or rustling sound; whisper
Poetry must not only conjures up new images of scenes that seem familiar, but also kick-start our minds by introducing us to new words, words that will come to mind again.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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susurruses= a soft murmuring or rustling sound; whisper
Poetry must not only conjures up new images of scenes that seem familiar, but also kick-start our minds by introducing us to new words, words that will come to mind again.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Thank you very much, my dear friend,
namaste,
Gypsy Haijin Sensei
Fanstory Instructor and poet
Member of the Haiku Society of America
~*~ a new haiku class every month ~*~
<>o<> Haiku 201 starts on April 5th<>o<>
~<>o<> Haiga starts on May 1st <>o<>~
