Family Poems and Stories 2010-2017
Viewing comments for Chapter 19 "Booking Flights"...musings on us
50 total reviews
Comment from dmt1967
I hope he gets clean as well, my friend. I had a drug addiction and have been clean for nineteen years. I hope this gives you encouragement. My late husband gave me an ultimatum; my daughter, him, the dog or the drugs. I chose my family and went cold turkey. Good luck and thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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I hope he gets clean as well, my friend. I had a drug addiction and have been clean for nineteen years. I hope this gives you encouragement. My late husband gave me an ultimatum; my daughter, him, the dog or the drugs. I chose my family and went cold turkey. Good luck and thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Thank you so much for stopping by to read and review. Your encouraging words give me hope. I'm not sure if I will give him an ultimatum or not. Sometimes I think it is important to give him love. I'm not providing a home or physical support. No $$ is exchanged - I simply stay in touch. I appreciate your warm words,
~patty~
Comment from kriver
Hi Patty,
You need to have your husband go with you.
This trip to see you son is so very important to you
and you need his support. You need to tell him exactly that too. You need to make him feel needed it is important to your relationship. This is a very good way to do it especially if this isn't his bio son. He needs to be included NOT excluded regardless of the extra money, time off work etc and all of that. There are NO excuses. He needs and wants to be there for you. But you have to make know and believe you want him with you not just assume that he knows. You need to flat out and out tell him that you do. Don't put on a macho independent woman front you need to be vulnerable and dependent upon him. He won't tell you this but he needs to feel you are depending on him especially at this time. Now then as for the boy, you are his mother you don't give him a choice or take NO for an answer NO ifs and or buts he is going that is it end of discussion. I don't care how old he is. YOU make him do it. Make NO mistake YOU ARE IN A FIGHT TO SAVE HIS LIFE Your goal is to save his life not win a popularity contest. Call rehab centers in the area that specialize in drug treatment. Call from your house. Set everything up go early check the places out know how to get there without getting lost. Preferably one that is nation wide and connected to your area. Make arrangements for him to be involuntarily committed. Because your his parents see what you can do to get him in. Pray and ask GOD to help you get him in the right place. If one outfit says no go to another but find one. GOD will lead you to the right place. Make all the arrangements 1st have it all set up then pick him up. Take him there check him in and locked in behind locked doors make sure he is in there and that he can't voluntarily check out. It has to be a locked down facility. They will ask if he is a danger to himself or others say YES He is without any hesitation on your part. Find a place there. Then when the Docs say he can travel. Pick him up take on the plane with you he doesn't get out of that seat period. Take him to another rehab near you and get him in there direct from the airport no detour's straight to the rehab place. This is after he is totally clean and well on his way to recovery. DO NOT TELL HIM that your taking him to rehab the 1st time. He can: cry, scream, jump up and down and throw a temper tantrum it doesn't matter what he does or says the bottom line is he is going to treatment and will stay there period. The other choice is to plan his funeral because the drugs are going to kill him. This is the harsh reality.
He can not and is incapable of making this decision for himself don't let him go back to his room or where ever he is living or he will disappear. He will say well I need to get something 1st the answer is NO. Your doing this out of love for him. He will not see it that way now or for a while maybe. But you have to do this. It is your only way to save him. I know you might think K River is butting in to my business telling me what I need to do. But your too close to the situation and you needed outside eyes to see. I wouldn't be you friend if I didn't tell you the truth as I can see it clearly from outside of the situation for what it really is. I would also be disobeying what GOD showed me to do. I can't do that regardless of the consequences. What I have written to you is what GOD has shown me. My responsibility was to tell you. What you choose to do with the information and warning is completely up to you. I hope you follow through not only for your son to save his life. But also for your peace of mind and for your relationship with your husband. One favor I would ask you to do is to pm me and let me know what happens. GOD has heard your prayers Patty and now HE has answered you in a very direct way. It is up to you to follow through by putting action to your faith and do what you have been told to do and do it right away don't wait weeks or months. By then it will be too late. You need to do this right away. If it was me as soon as I read this I'd start packing and get the next flight out rent a car hotel etc. I wouldn't wait for a convenient time and all of that. I would treat it as the emergency that it is. Keep those other trips so you can visit him. But do this one asap or you may not have a son to visit. You don't realize or understand how desperate the real situation is. I know this is a harsh thing to say and a very difficult thing to face and read but it is the truth. You needed to hear it for your own good and to save your son's life. I'll be praying for both you and you husband for the strength, the courage, the wisdom, and the knowledge with which to deal with you son. Patty I am a for all intent and purposes a stranger to you I sure hope you'll listen to what GOD has told you to do. God told my GM through a friend to go Seattle WA. She was in Los Angeles in the 1930's depression no money. She went in pack a pillowcase and said OK LORD how do I get there a lady knocked on the door asked if anyone wanted a ride up to WA dead of winter right about now. they drove a model T truck through Donner's Pass to WA She was just in time to save my mom and my sister's lives. If she had waited my whole family mom sister, brother all their kids, grandkids and myself would not be alive or exist my mom and sister would have died if my GM had waited at all.
Best regards,
K River
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Hi Patty,
You need to have your husband go with you.
This trip to see you son is so very important to you
and you need his support. You need to tell him exactly that too. You need to make him feel needed it is important to your relationship. This is a very good way to do it especially if this isn't his bio son. He needs to be included NOT excluded regardless of the extra money, time off work etc and all of that. There are NO excuses. He needs and wants to be there for you. But you have to make know and believe you want him with you not just assume that he knows. You need to flat out and out tell him that you do. Don't put on a macho independent woman front you need to be vulnerable and dependent upon him. He won't tell you this but he needs to feel you are depending on him especially at this time. Now then as for the boy, you are his mother you don't give him a choice or take NO for an answer NO ifs and or buts he is going that is it end of discussion. I don't care how old he is. YOU make him do it. Make NO mistake YOU ARE IN A FIGHT TO SAVE HIS LIFE Your goal is to save his life not win a popularity contest. Call rehab centers in the area that specialize in drug treatment. Call from your house. Set everything up go early check the places out know how to get there without getting lost. Preferably one that is nation wide and connected to your area. Make arrangements for him to be involuntarily committed. Because your his parents see what you can do to get him in. Pray and ask GOD to help you get him in the right place. If one outfit says no go to another but find one. GOD will lead you to the right place. Make all the arrangements 1st have it all set up then pick him up. Take him there check him in and locked in behind locked doors make sure he is in there and that he can't voluntarily check out. It has to be a locked down facility. They will ask if he is a danger to himself or others say YES He is without any hesitation on your part. Find a place there. Then when the Docs say he can travel. Pick him up take on the plane with you he doesn't get out of that seat period. Take him to another rehab near you and get him in there direct from the airport no detour's straight to the rehab place. This is after he is totally clean and well on his way to recovery. DO NOT TELL HIM that your taking him to rehab the 1st time. He can: cry, scream, jump up and down and throw a temper tantrum it doesn't matter what he does or says the bottom line is he is going to treatment and will stay there period. The other choice is to plan his funeral because the drugs are going to kill him. This is the harsh reality.
He can not and is incapable of making this decision for himself don't let him go back to his room or where ever he is living or he will disappear. He will say well I need to get something 1st the answer is NO. Your doing this out of love for him. He will not see it that way now or for a while maybe. But you have to do this. It is your only way to save him. I know you might think K River is butting in to my business telling me what I need to do. But your too close to the situation and you needed outside eyes to see. I wouldn't be you friend if I didn't tell you the truth as I can see it clearly from outside of the situation for what it really is. I would also be disobeying what GOD showed me to do. I can't do that regardless of the consequences. What I have written to you is what GOD has shown me. My responsibility was to tell you. What you choose to do with the information and warning is completely up to you. I hope you follow through not only for your son to save his life. But also for your peace of mind and for your relationship with your husband. One favor I would ask you to do is to pm me and let me know what happens. GOD has heard your prayers Patty and now HE has answered you in a very direct way. It is up to you to follow through by putting action to your faith and do what you have been told to do and do it right away don't wait weeks or months. By then it will be too late. You need to do this right away. If it was me as soon as I read this I'd start packing and get the next flight out rent a car hotel etc. I wouldn't wait for a convenient time and all of that. I would treat it as the emergency that it is. Keep those other trips so you can visit him. But do this one asap or you may not have a son to visit. You don't realize or understand how desperate the real situation is. I know this is a harsh thing to say and a very difficult thing to face and read but it is the truth. You needed to hear it for your own good and to save your son's life. I'll be praying for both you and you husband for the strength, the courage, the wisdom, and the knowledge with which to deal with you son. Patty I am a for all intent and purposes a stranger to you I sure hope you'll listen to what GOD has told you to do. God told my GM through a friend to go Seattle WA. She was in Los Angeles in the 1930's depression no money. She went in pack a pillowcase and said OK LORD how do I get there a lady knocked on the door asked if anyone wanted a ride up to WA dead of winter right about now. they drove a model T truck through Donner's Pass to WA She was just in time to save my mom and my sister's lives. If she had waited my whole family mom sister, brother all their kids, grandkids and myself would not be alive or exist my mom and sister would have died if my GM had waited at all.
Best regards,
K River
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Thank you so much for your prayerful response. I read this last night and took my prayers to Jesus. After a night full of praying and counsel with my Lord, I am going to keep to my original plan. I heard the urgency in your words, and I do appreciate your concerns. I DO realize I may not have the 6 weeks until my planned trip. Something can happen in this time, but I have been told to put my faith in Him.
I will be sure to let my Fan Story family know how everything goes in May,
~patty~
Comment from Sis Cat
I pray this trip brings your son closer to rehab, too. I am both excited for you and hopeful. Spending time with both of your children will be great for you. Your experience of trying to book flight and hotel resonated with me as I have spent many hours trying to do the same. Your status update is hopeful. Your FanStory family are rooting for you, your son, and your book. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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I pray this trip brings your son closer to rehab, too. I am both excited for you and hopeful. Spending time with both of your children will be great for you. Your experience of trying to book flight and hotel resonated with me as I have spent many hours trying to do the same. Your status update is hopeful. Your FanStory family are rooting for you, your son, and your book. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2017
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Thank you for stopping by to read and review. I appreciate your thoughts, wishes and encouragement.
~patty~
Comment from ciliverde
Good for you! I know the struggles of making reservations, and yes, you have to go to the hotel's own website to really see what you're getting. Sometimes you are pleasantly surprised and other times you think...never again. But you just need a nice, decent place to stay while you visit with your son. I wish you the best in that journey :))
Carol
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Good for you! I know the struggles of making reservations, and yes, you have to go to the hotel's own website to really see what you're getting. Sometimes you are pleasantly surprised and other times you think...never again. But you just need a nice, decent place to stay while you visit with your son. I wish you the best in that journey :))
Carol
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Thank you for stopping by to read and review. I appreciate your thoughtful and warm wishes,
~patty~
Comment from pome lover
Patty,
I wish you the best going to see your son. It sounds, to me, like there is hope of his going into rehab if he stays in contact with you. My son was on drugs, too, so I understand. It is a tough situation and I hope that your visit will be successful.
And in June - grandbabies! How wonderful.
Good old basic Southwest Airlines! A Texas staple. :)
You are brave to write about your son. I cannot. It's been over thirty years since his estrangement from me, his sister and precious niece. His loss.
Your writing sounds optimistic. God bless you. I hope it is.
Katharine - pome lover
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Patty,
I wish you the best going to see your son. It sounds, to me, like there is hope of his going into rehab if he stays in contact with you. My son was on drugs, too, so I understand. It is a tough situation and I hope that your visit will be successful.
And in June - grandbabies! How wonderful.
Good old basic Southwest Airlines! A Texas staple. :)
You are brave to write about your son. I cannot. It's been over thirty years since his estrangement from me, his sister and precious niece. His loss.
Your writing sounds optimistic. God bless you. I hope it is.
Katharine - pome lover
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Hi Katharine; I'm so sorry to hear about your son. All too often, I believe, the addict would rather distance themselves from the pain of disappointing their loved ones, than face up to their problem. I am holding onto hope that Gregory will see that he needs help to overcome his addiction. As I write this, I'm anticipating our weekly call within the hour - I have faith these calls will lead him to acknowledge his issues,
~patty~
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I hope you're right!
Comment from wondertwin
What a nicely written short autobiographical piece...expressing the love surrounding you on the home front and the the love extending out to your precious children...
Nothing can replace a mother's love...
Blessings, AmyJo
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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What a nicely written short autobiographical piece...expressing the love surrounding you on the home front and the the love extending out to your precious children...
Nothing can replace a mother's love...
Blessings, AmyJo
Comment Written 26-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 26-Mar-2017
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Thank you, AmyJo, for reading and reviewing. I appreciate your comments and encouragement.
~patty~
Comment from catch22
Hi Patty, this is the first I have read of your stories. I sincerely hope your trip goes well and you can reconnect with your son and maybe even open the door to hope again. Addiction is a tough thing to deal with for family and friends, but having a loving support system is always a means of providing hope to the sufferer. I wish you well and thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2017
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Hi Patty, this is the first I have read of your stories. I sincerely hope your trip goes well and you can reconnect with your son and maybe even open the door to hope again. Addiction is a tough thing to deal with for family and friends, but having a loving support system is always a means of providing hope to the sufferer. I wish you well and thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 25-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2017
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Thank you so much for your warm wishes. I'm hoping and praying that I can open that door just a little.
~patty~
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You're welcome. I hope so too.
Comment from Ulla
Hi Patty, I will be thinking of you. It must be so hard to have a child becoming an addict. I hope you'll be able to help and influence by your presence and the love shown to him. A difficult situation. I'm so glad you have your grandchildren. All the best. Ulla:)))
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2017
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Hi Patty, I will be thinking of you. It must be so hard to have a child becoming an addict. I hope you'll be able to help and influence by your presence and the love shown to him. A difficult situation. I'm so glad you have your grandchildren. All the best. Ulla:)))
Comment Written 25-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2017
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Thank you for stopping by to read and review. I appreciate your kind words of commiseration. This is a challenge I truly never imagined, but I know I can make it through with His help and guidance,
~patty~
Comment from chcbeck
You are extremely brave in writting so honest and openly acknowledging your hopes for the future. My father was an alcoholic the best part of my life and I am only getting to know him now since he has been sober for three years. To be honest he got himself into a coma before he changed but up to that point I thought people never change yet this proved me wrong. Good luck for the future.
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2017
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You are extremely brave in writting so honest and openly acknowledging your hopes for the future. My father was an alcoholic the best part of my life and I am only getting to know him now since he has been sober for three years. To be honest he got himself into a coma before he changed but up to that point I thought people never change yet this proved me wrong. Good luck for the future.
Comment Written 25-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2017
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Thank you for reading more of my work. Your comments are appreciated, and I'm glad to hear you are finally getting to have a relationship with your father. Miracles do happen!
~patty~
Comment from His Grayness
The writing here is very "genuine" and in-forced. It is full of energy an passion that comes through very strongly.. The story content is saddening of course but well-relates the reality of the world we live in today with drugs attacking our loved ones and computer servers dumbfounding interested customers as life goes on in so many constant surprises. My hope is that this author actually has some fun and good luck through it all! BEST REGARDS AND THANKS! HIS GRAYNESS: Vance
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2017
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The writing here is very "genuine" and in-forced. It is full of energy an passion that comes through very strongly.. The story content is saddening of course but well-relates the reality of the world we live in today with drugs attacking our loved ones and computer servers dumbfounding interested customers as life goes on in so many constant surprises. My hope is that this author actually has some fun and good luck through it all! BEST REGARDS AND THANKS! HIS GRAYNESS: Vance
Comment Written 25-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 25-Mar-2017
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Thank you so much for stopping by to read and review. I appreciate your warm wishes and kind words,
~patty~
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My pleasure indeed! Vance
