The Piper
Viewing comments for Chapter 14 "The Piper, part 14"Young Adult Fantasy
14 total reviews
Comment from May 1
Once again a great description to start off the chapter. Haha, she makes a good point I've been wondering about the talking wolves myself. Well, making a sorcerer angry sure isn't the smartest move. Oh, it's good to hear that she is not there to hurt him. Haha, I think that he has a point when he asks how could he know she won't eat him. Haha, I love the part when he asks 'a start to what' because it's so real, I would wonder the same. Well, the last part is quite intriguing. I keep wondering what secrets they are hiding and I think you do a great job in keeping the readers guessing.
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2020
  |
Once again a great description to start off the chapter. Haha, she makes a good point I've been wondering about the talking wolves myself. Well, making a sorcerer angry sure isn't the smartest move. Oh, it's good to hear that she is not there to hurt him. Haha, I think that he has a point when he asks how could he know she won't eat him. Haha, I love the part when he asks 'a start to what' because it's so real, I would wonder the same. Well, the last part is quite intriguing. I keep wondering what secrets they are hiding and I think you do a great job in keeping the readers guessing.
Comment Written 31-Jan-2020
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2020
-
Hi May 1,
I agree, it is best not to anger a sorcerer. Thank you for such a great review. It was so fun to read.
Debi
Comment from rspoet
Sheba, a wolf, perhaps in appearance only,
appears more friend than foe,
but Piper is right to be cautious
in the world of uncertainty.
The interplay between the two is very well done
with suspicion on Piper's part.
Obviously, Summerstorm has placed Piper
in a very important position, even Sheba is surprised
Piper's allowed to call him Redd-Lief.
Now there are voices in the distance, likely the troupe
searching for the two boys.
But are they the "good guys" or the "bad guys"
One note, Sheba referring to Piper as "dear boy" is good
but it may be overdone a bit. Perhaps a little variation.
Excellent chapter and addition to the story.
RS
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2017
 |
Sheba, a wolf, perhaps in appearance only,
appears more friend than foe,
but Piper is right to be cautious
in the world of uncertainty.
The interplay between the two is very well done
with suspicion on Piper's part.
Obviously, Summerstorm has placed Piper
in a very important position, even Sheba is surprised
Piper's allowed to call him Redd-Lief.
Now there are voices in the distance, likely the troupe
searching for the two boys.
But are they the "good guys" or the "bad guys"
One note, Sheba referring to Piper as "dear boy" is good
but it may be overdone a bit. Perhaps a little variation.
Excellent chapter and addition to the story.
RS
Comment Written 21-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2017
-
Hi RS,
Thank you for the wonderful six star rating. It brightened my day a lot. I appreciate the encouraging feedback and your analysis. I used "dear boy" four times I see. Due to your feedback I removed two of them. Thank you for continuing to follow the story.
Debi
Comment from Pam (respa)
-This is quite an interesting chapter, Debi.
-The interaction between Sheba and Piper is very good.
-Piper doesn't know what to think--what is this wolf all about?
-She seems to have a soothing voice, and finally reveals who she is,
and why she was sent.
-Now, we need to learn more about her, and exactly what was
going on outside that even made Sheba cautious.
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2017
|
-This is quite an interesting chapter, Debi.
-The interaction between Sheba and Piper is very good.
-Piper doesn't know what to think--what is this wolf all about?
-She seems to have a soothing voice, and finally reveals who she is,
and why she was sent.
-Now, we need to learn more about her, and exactly what was
going on outside that even made Sheba cautious.
Comment Written 21-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2017
-
Hi Pam,
I appreciate the six stars so much! Thank you! I appreciate your comments about the i characters and the questions they raise for the reader. Thank you for your continued support.
Debi
-
You are very welcome for the stars and review and the support. The story gets more and more intriguing.
Comment from davisr (Rhonda)
I love this chapter! What an amazing story you've spun. I've missed a few chapters, but love the way you're keeping people caught up with your summary.
The wolf character is a nice invention. I like her already!
Take care,
Rhonda
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2017
|
I love this chapter! What an amazing story you've spun. I've missed a few chapters, but love the way you're keeping people caught up with your summary.
The wolf character is a nice invention. I like her already!
Take care,
Rhonda
Comment Written 21-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 22-Mar-2017
-
Hi Rhonda,
Thank you for the encouraging comments. I am pleased you like Sheba and this chapter. I appreciate you dropping in to read and review.
Debi
Comment from apky
Wonderful description here:
Piper glanced toward the mouth of the cave. Nothing but darkness was visible now the sun was fully set. The cloud cover made the air heavy. A knot settled in his stomach and his throat tightened. Out of habit, Piper's hand went to the flute at his side, as it often did when he sought reassurance. "Redd-Leif should be back soon."
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2017
|
Wonderful description here:
Piper glanced toward the mouth of the cave. Nothing but darkness was visible now the sun was fully set. The cloud cover made the air heavy. A knot settled in his stomach and his throat tightened. Out of habit, Piper's hand went to the flute at his side, as it often did when he sought reassurance. "Redd-Leif should be back soon."
Comment Written 19-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2017
-
Thank you for the encouraging comments. I appreciate you dropping by.
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Interesting storyline with plenty of action.
The danger of the approaching wolf in the cave adds another dimension of tension to the tale.
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2017
|
Interesting storyline with plenty of action.
The danger of the approaching wolf in the cave adds another dimension of tension to the tale.
Comment Written 19-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2017
-
Thank you for dropping in to read and review. I appreciate the encouraging comments about the story. I am pleased you enjoy the tension.
Comment from giraffmang
Hi there,
really good, solid and well written chapter here. the character of Sheba is well realised and the emotions are well writ from Piper's perspective.
very enjoyable
G
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2017
|
Hi there,
really good, solid and well written chapter here. the character of Sheba is well realised and the emotions are well writ from Piper's perspective.
very enjoyable
G
Comment Written 19-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2017
-
Hi G,
It means a lot to hear from a successful writer that you found the chapter "really good, solid, and well written," the new character "well realised" and the emotions "well writ". You have made my day! Thank you so much for following the story and taking time to review.
Debi
Comment from Benny Beeharry
Hi friend, as before the story tantalised ...now a wolf who is not a wolf
A wolf who speaks
That enough to scare the life out of poor Piper, although he eventually succumb to sleep. I like the business tone of Sheba, and this keeps the suspense at a very high level. Brilliant. Make the rest as beautiful as this.
Danny Jock
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2017
|
Hi friend, as before the story tantalised ...now a wolf who is not a wolf
A wolf who speaks
That enough to scare the life out of poor Piper, although he eventually succumb to sleep. I like the business tone of Sheba, and this keeps the suspense at a very high level. Brilliant. Make the rest as beautiful as this.
Danny Jock
Comment Written 19-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2017
-
Hi Danny,
I am pleased you find the story tantalizing and that you like the new character introduced in this chapter. Yes, poor Piper's life is not what is was and may never be again. I appreciate the encouragement.
Debi
Comment from Sis Cat
Wow, what a chapter. You captivated my imagination when Piper faced a wolf in the cave. Soon we learn that the wolf was not a real wolf. Piper was confused:
"Piper stayed where he was. 'How do I know you won't eat me?'
and
"A start to what? I'm trapped in a cave with a wolf that isn't a wolf, too afraid to sleep and too tired to stay awake."
Piper responds as if Sheba is the Big Bad Wolf of "Little Red Riding Hood" and not Akela in "The Jungle Book." I love the maternal way Sheba treats Piper. I feel her love and her exasperation: "Thank goodness the boy had finally drifted off."
The ending where "she melted into the shadows outside the cave" enchanted me.
Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2017
|
Wow, what a chapter. You captivated my imagination when Piper faced a wolf in the cave. Soon we learn that the wolf was not a real wolf. Piper was confused:
"Piper stayed where he was. 'How do I know you won't eat me?'
and
"A start to what? I'm trapped in a cave with a wolf that isn't a wolf, too afraid to sleep and too tired to stay awake."
Piper responds as if Sheba is the Big Bad Wolf of "Little Red Riding Hood" and not Akela in "The Jungle Book." I love the maternal way Sheba treats Piper. I feel her love and her exasperation: "Thank goodness the boy had finally drifted off."
The ending where "she melted into the shadows outside the cave" enchanted me.
Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 19-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 19-Mar-2017
-
Thank you for the excellent review. I love the analysis of the characters and their reactions. Thank you for stopping in to read and review.
Debi
Comment from nancy_e_davis
This is very entertaining Debi! A wolf that isn't a wolf.
"I made a sorcerer angry. Obviously, not advisable." She lowered herself to the ground, and crossed her paws in front of her. "You must be Piper."
You have very good imagery in this chapter. I could see the wolf taunting him. Well done Nancy
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2017
|
This is very entertaining Debi! A wolf that isn't a wolf.
"I made a sorcerer angry. Obviously, not advisable." She lowered herself to the ground, and crossed her paws in front of her. "You must be Piper."
You have very good imagery in this chapter. I could see the wolf taunting him. Well done Nancy
Comment Written 18-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 18-Mar-2017
-
Hi Nancy,
Thank you for the six stars! I appreciate the encouragement. I am so happy to hear you are enjoying the story and can visualize the action. Thank you for following it.
Have a wonderful weekend.
Debi
