Haiku Club Challenge Multi-Author
Viewing comments for Chapter 13 "haiku (far from floral fields)"A collection of haiku written by FanStory Poets
73 total reviews
Comment from Leineco
Your haiku congers up the sweetness of summer beautifully. . .
flowers in full bloom, pollen & honey, lazing 'neath a honey
gold sun. . .and it's bittersweet, inevitable end.
Your bumblebee may have (unfortunately) died early - but I have
come to see them as an iconic symbol of summer. . .venturing
out as spring commences, but more and more prolific as summer
unfolds.
While your bee bids farewell to the promise of summer, as a haiku
I see this as a farewell to the season of abundance.
Very nicely done :-)
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
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Your haiku congers up the sweetness of summer beautifully. . .
flowers in full bloom, pollen & honey, lazing 'neath a honey
gold sun. . .and it's bittersweet, inevitable end.
Your bumblebee may have (unfortunately) died early - but I have
come to see them as an iconic symbol of summer. . .venturing
out as spring commences, but more and more prolific as summer
unfolds.
While your bee bids farewell to the promise of summer, as a haiku
I see this as a farewell to the season of abundance.
Very nicely done :-)
Comment Written 08-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
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Yes, Leineco, my bee bid farewell to life and to a summer of abundance. Thank you for your generous review.
Comment from Hitcher
A nice little haiku with sad undertones and strong visuals with or without the artwork which for me is a must when it come to this form. Over here in NZ bees are like gold dust and hives are being stolen on a regular basis, it is insane! Apparently there are not enough bees but way to many wasps. Cool poem!
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
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A nice little haiku with sad undertones and strong visuals with or without the artwork which for me is a must when it come to this form. Over here in NZ bees are like gold dust and hives are being stolen on a regular basis, it is insane! Apparently there are not enough bees but way to many wasps. Cool poem!
Comment Written 08-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
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Yes, Hitcher, we have the same problem over here in California . . .bee thieves! What has the world come to? But you are right, the bees are like gold dust. Thank you for your review of my "nice little haiku with sad undertones."
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
I don't like bees and wasps, though know they are necessary. A good haiku and how nice of Mina to assist in writing it. My dog is a writer as well, mostly stories. Take care, my friend~Debbie
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
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I don't like bees and wasps, though know they are necessary. A good haiku and how nice of Mina to assist in writing it. My dog is a writer as well, mostly stories. Take care, my friend~Debbie
Comment Written 08-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
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Yes, Debbie, Mina, sniffs out many haiku ideas for me. Thank you for your review. I know your dog is keeping you busy, too.
Comment from Alex Biasin
I liked this.
A good indicator not only of the changing of seasons but also of the problems with climate change, as the dying out of bees is one of the biggest challenges agriculture will face in coming years.
No bees, no food.
Great stuff.
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
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I liked this.
A good indicator not only of the changing of seasons but also of the problems with climate change, as the dying out of bees is one of the biggest challenges agriculture will face in coming years.
No bees, no food.
Great stuff.
Comment Written 08-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
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That's right, Alex: no bees, no food. One reviewer worked in the business of selling bee hives to farmers at $150 per colony. I live in agricultural California and we depend on these little workers even as the climate changes. Thank you for your review.
Comment from zanya
A tribute to our precious bee and his situation in our Universe -such a poignant pic to illustrate - and Einstein warned us of humanity's fate if we impair our bee population
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
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A tribute to our precious bee and his situation in our Universe -such a poignant pic to illustrate - and Einstein warned us of humanity's fate if we impair our bee population
Comment Written 08-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 10-Mar-2017
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Yes, Zanya, Heaven help humanity if we kill off all of the bees. Thank you for your review of my tribute to our precious bee.
Comment from l.raven
HI Andre, very well written my friend...I don't think a lot of people know the value of a bee...they are so important in the cycle of life...very well written form...and a true story...love Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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HI Andre, very well written my friend...I don't think a lot of people know the value of a bee...they are so important in the cycle of life...very well written form...and a true story...love Linda xxoo
Comment Written 08-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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Thank you, Linda, for your generous review of my "very well written haiku" about the value of bees.
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you are so welcome Andre...always...xxoo love
Comment from dragonpoet
Yes this is the wrong time and place for this bee. Though it is the way most people like to see bees after all the flowers have flourished in Spring and Summer.
I like that all the lines are the same length and the alliteration in the first and last lines. Can it be called a Haiku if it isn't in a short-long-short format?
Keep writing
dp
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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Yes this is the wrong time and place for this bee. Though it is the way most people like to see bees after all the flowers have flourished in Spring and Summer.
I like that all the lines are the same length and the alliteration in the first and last lines. Can it be called a Haiku if it isn't in a short-long-short format?
Keep writing
dp
Comment Written 08-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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Yes, Dragonpoet, it still can be called a Haiku if it isn't in a short-long-short format in terms of length, but I am unsure in terms of syllables. I wrote a 5-6-5 Haiku while the standard is 5-7-5. Thank you for your review.
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Maybe you can't tell it's short long short because all the lines end in the same place.
You're welcome.
Joan
Comment from Douglas Paul
A great observation that you turned into a haiku. This is the way it should be done. I also like the alliteration that you used. Very well done, Andre
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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A great observation that you turned into a haiku. This is the way it should be done. I also like the alliteration that you used. Very well done, Andre
Comment Written 08-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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Thank you, Douglas, for your review of my haiku based upon "a great observation" which "is the way it should be done."
Comment from Bill Schott
This haiku, Far From Floral Fields, makes this sight meaningful as we are drawn to the sadness. Industrious and sacraficing to the end, the bee, busy building the bee-tomorrow, expires.
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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This haiku, Far From Floral Fields, makes this sight meaningful as we are drawn to the sadness. Industrious and sacraficing to the end, the bee, busy building the bee-tomorrow, expires.
Comment Written 08-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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Thank you, Bill, for your review of my haiku on a meaningful sight.
Comment from Mrs Happy Poet
Yes this is well written my friend has everything this poetic for asks for a very creative poem for this mufti author book well done regards Jill
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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Yes this is well written my friend has everything this poetic for asks for a very creative poem for this mufti author book well done regards Jill
Comment Written 08-Mar-2017
reply by the author on 08-Mar-2017
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Thank you, Jill, for your review of my "well written" haiku. I am glad it "has everything this poetic for asks for a very creative poem."
