Tanka Waka
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "Tanka (our kisses)"A collection of Japanese short poetry
21 total reviews
Comment from Jackarrie
Hi Gypsy
I love how you used artwork and Japanese calligraphy to enhance this tanka. I really like the last line: Our hearts will remember. Excellent artistic presentation.
Well done Mary
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2017
Hi Gypsy
I love how you used artwork and Japanese calligraphy to enhance this tanka. I really like the last line: Our hearts will remember. Excellent artistic presentation.
Well done Mary
Comment Written 23-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 23-Feb-2017
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Thank you, honey, I appreciate your readership.
Gypsy hugs
Comment from krys123
Good greetings, Gypsy;
-I immensely enjoyed reading your tanka because of its professional composition due to its very definitively and distinctively descriptive imagery and a very demonstratively expressive visualization of a romantic episode in the two lines of lovers.
-All of the verbs are actively chosen along with the other descriptive lines of your writing and tanka.
-I expressly notice that your pivot line pulls together and sets a tone for the first two and last two lines of your grammatically connected sentences.
-The picture relates very heavily to the composition and as well chosen for this tanka.
-Thank you, delightfully, for sharing and posting this writing and may you have a good one where and when you can find it with the one you love.
Alex
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2017
Good greetings, Gypsy;
-I immensely enjoyed reading your tanka because of its professional composition due to its very definitively and distinctively descriptive imagery and a very demonstratively expressive visualization of a romantic episode in the two lines of lovers.
-All of the verbs are actively chosen along with the other descriptive lines of your writing and tanka.
-I expressly notice that your pivot line pulls together and sets a tone for the first two and last two lines of your grammatically connected sentences.
-The picture relates very heavily to the composition and as well chosen for this tanka.
-Thank you, delightfully, for sharing and posting this writing and may you have a good one where and when you can find it with the one you love.
Alex
Comment Written 22-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2017
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Thank you, my friend :)
Gypsy
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You are welcome, Gypsy.
Alex
Comment from Lu Saluna
I am so far behind in my reviewing, in everything.... I apologize for taking so long to review.
I am no expert, as you know I am just learning. Your tank reminds of the ones I have been reading of the Akiko Yosano. Very traditional, romantic and sensual.
The flow is smooth and lovely. Though I know this is not a requirement, your tanka reads backs smoothly as well as from what I understand indicates a well written pivotal line
Very beautiful and I love the way you presented it.
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2017
I am so far behind in my reviewing, in everything.... I apologize for taking so long to review.
I am no expert, as you know I am just learning. Your tank reminds of the ones I have been reading of the Akiko Yosano. Very traditional, romantic and sensual.
The flow is smooth and lovely. Though I know this is not a requirement, your tanka reads backs smoothly as well as from what I understand indicates a well written pivotal line
Very beautiful and I love the way you presented it.
Comment Written 22-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2017
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Thank you, my friend :)
Thank you for the six stars, sweetie pie
Luv ya
Gypsy
Comment from BOO ghost
You found away! Wish we could edit Japanese words on our formats. We need special fonts so we can use different languages. this is great and romantic! Dang! BOO has a friend who is half Japanese. He tells me so many stores about his family. I learned a lot about the Japanese. Their religion is more like Shinto/Kami cult. they worship nature and trees have souls. Swords too. I was saving this gold nugget in case somebody gave me a six and I give one back ut this is sort what I had in mind, .. this will be book cased. I need to read it several times to comprehend it 100%. Your translation is at the top. dang, could not paste the words for a Japanese translation.
ç´?¾??ã??ã??ã??ç§?ã??ã?¡ã?®¾??å¾?ã?®ã?ã?¹
ã?¾ã??ä¼?ã??ã?¾ã??ã??ã??
¾?¥ã??å?¬¾£ã?§ã??ã??ã?¨ã??
¾¬¡ã?®å®?å?¨ã?ªå??ç©«ã?®¾??ã?®å??ã?«ã??
ç§?ã??ã?¡ã?®å¿?ã?¯é¦?ã??ã?¦ã??ã?¾ã??ã??
that is your words translated into Japanese.
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2017
You found away! Wish we could edit Japanese words on our formats. We need special fonts so we can use different languages. this is great and romantic! Dang! BOO has a friend who is half Japanese. He tells me so many stores about his family. I learned a lot about the Japanese. Their religion is more like Shinto/Kami cult. they worship nature and trees have souls. Swords too. I was saving this gold nugget in case somebody gave me a six and I give one back ut this is sort what I had in mind, .. this will be book cased. I need to read it several times to comprehend it 100%. Your translation is at the top. dang, could not paste the words for a Japanese translation.
ç´?¾??ã??ã??ã??ç§?ã??ã?¡ã?®¾??å¾?ã?®ã?ã?¹
ã?¾ã??ä¼?ã??ã?¾ã??ã??ã??
¾?¥ã??å?¬¾£ã?§ã??ã??ã?¨ã??
¾¬¡ã?®å®?å?¨ã?ªå??ç©«ã?®¾??ã?®å??ã?«ã??
ç§?ã??ã?¡ã?®å¿?ã?¯é¦?ã??ã?¦ã??ã?¾ã??ã??
that is your words translated into Japanese.
Comment Written 21-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2017
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Hello, Honey, have ever used Paint? It's a microsoft app. You can copy the kanji (japanese words) to Paint, then upload it to photobucket, then post in fanstory. I can help you but Dean is the best. He is the one who taught me.
Thank you for the six stars, sweetie pie. I ran out of stars fast. I wish we were given more than six.
Thank you for the review, honey.
Gypsy
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I see... yep, I got Windows paint, s a wee bit complicated process to upload images and use paint. I may could do it --if I put enough time into it. My photobucket runs slow, I do not have a big system which allows me... still, that takes time and a knack to get used to paint. I do not post much so that is the reason I do not use paint. Now that is a real traditional japanese haiku, not a copy, like we westerners use. I think that the roots of haiku is the true haiku. Liked your presentation very much. i was saving that nugget but you took it from BOO. ha ha, you some gypsy.
Comment from l.raven
HI Gypsy, I miss kisses from the past...kisses I'll never feel again...sigh...I love your poem you...very nicely written Queen of Haiku...love ya Linda xxoo
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2017
HI Gypsy, I miss kisses from the past...kisses I'll never feel again...sigh...I love your poem you...very nicely written Queen of Haiku...love ya Linda xxoo
Comment Written 21-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 22-Feb-2017
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Luv ya, back, Ms Linda, thank you for reading :)
Gypsy
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you are always sooooo very welcome...sorry for the late reply...internet...was off a few days...now it's catch up time...smiling back at ya...love xxoo
Comment from Ric Myworld
New to the different styles and forms of poetry, I've quickly learned that the shorter structures can use so few words to share the talented poet's thoughts and intentions. Thanks for sharing your visions of this couple's planned last kiss. Hair whipping in the wind, tangling around their tongues. There goes the appetite. Great job. :-)
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
New to the different styles and forms of poetry, I've quickly learned that the shorter structures can use so few words to share the talented poet's thoughts and intentions. Thanks for sharing your visions of this couple's planned last kiss. Hair whipping in the wind, tangling around their tongues. There goes the appetite. Great job. :-)
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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Thank you, sweetie pie,
big gypsy hugs
Comment from Sasha
This flows smoothly. I love how you used artwork and Japanese calligraphy to enhance this tanka. I especially like the last line: Our hearts will remember. Excellent artistic presentation.
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
This flows smoothly. I love how you used artwork and Japanese calligraphy to enhance this tanka. I especially like the last line: Our hearts will remember. Excellent artistic presentation.
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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Thank you, sweetie pie,
big gypsy hugs
Comment from Douglas Paul
I like this one. It has the feeling of the old masters in the way it is written to communicate your love for someone. You did a good job on this, my friend
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
I like this one. It has the feeling of the old masters in the way it is written to communicate your love for someone. You did a good job on this, my friend
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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thank you, my friend. you are very kind
Comment from Chrissy710
Hi Gypsy. A clear Tanka that connects the first and last lines so read either way it sound nice as a promise of more to come on the harvest moon Clever presentation with the Japanese version looks impresive and compliments this traditional style Well done Cheers Christine ð???ð???
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
Hi Gypsy. A clear Tanka that connects the first and last lines so read either way it sound nice as a promise of more to come on the harvest moon Clever presentation with the Japanese version looks impresive and compliments this traditional style Well done Cheers Christine ð???ð???
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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Thank you, Christine
Comment from MizKat
Hi Gypsy,
I really enjoyed reading your poem which was very nice.
You are really great at writing them and which I enjoy reading.
Of course I don't understand the other poem you wrote.
Kat
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
Hi Gypsy,
I really enjoyed reading your poem which was very nice.
You are really great at writing them and which I enjoy reading.
Of course I don't understand the other poem you wrote.
Kat
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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thank you
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You are very welcome.