Haiku Club Challenge Multi-Author
Viewing comments for Chapter 10 "haiku (in the dead of night)"A collection of haiku written by FanStory Poets
79 total reviews
Comment from Zinnia48
Oh good grief! I wasn't going to read it as it seemed to gorey. However, I flipped back to it twice due to it's clever presentation. Also, I have a terrible cold and am quite "hoarse"/ the idea that I could be a vampire with a "horse" in my throat is quite amusing.
Six stars for cleverness! Caroline
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
Oh good grief! I wasn't going to read it as it seemed to gorey. However, I flipped back to it twice due to it's clever presentation. Also, I have a terrible cold and am quite "hoarse"/ the idea that I could be a vampire with a "horse" in my throat is quite amusing.
Six stars for cleverness! Caroline
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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Hahaha...
I would have never used humor in haiku until I took Gypsy Blue Rose's Haiku Classes, Caroline. I learned that even the greats like Basho used humor in their own haiku poetry, and that it is perfectly;y acceptable.
I'm glad you enjoyed the word play.
Thanks so much again for reading my work, you're too kind but I do appreciate it.
Warmest wishes,
~Dean
Comment from Mark Schardine
It takes a lot of effort to produce a surprise ending in a three-line poem, and you certainly succeeded. You also made an accurate observation about the natural world.
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
It takes a lot of effort to produce a surprise ending in a three-line poem, and you certainly succeeded. You also made an accurate observation about the natural world.
Comment Written 20-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 20-Feb-2017
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You're quite right, Mark.
A lot of thought has to go into it to make it work.
Thanks for reading my Haiku Club challenge on mammals.
I do appreciate the feedback.
Best wishes,
~Dean
Comment from Poetic Friend
Dean,
I don't know to laugh or cry. I keep thinking about that poor front in the mouth of the bat.
At any rate, your poem did its job-- to tell a story, offer imagery and convey a memorable message.
This poem is well-deserving of six stars.
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
Dean,
I don't know to laugh or cry. I keep thinking about that poor front in the mouth of the bat.
At any rate, your poem did its job-- to tell a story, offer imagery and convey a memorable message.
This poem is well-deserving of six stars.
Comment Written 19-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
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Thanks so much for reading my haiku, Poetic Friend.
I very much appreciate the kind comments and most generous six stars.
More than anything else, I'm happy you enjoyed it.
~Dean
Comment from 8Puppies
Yikes, not a fan of bats. But it doesn't matter - your poem is wondrous! Very clever wording. The sounds are perfect too. I do love animals -- all are amazing and miraculous. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
Yikes, not a fan of bats. But it doesn't matter - your poem is wondrous! Very clever wording. The sounds are perfect too. I do love animals -- all are amazing and miraculous. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 19-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
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Thanks so much for reading my haiku, 8Puppies.
I very much appreciate the kind comments as well as the six stars.
More than anything else, I'm happy you enjoyed it.
Comment from barbara.wilkey
This is the Dean Kuch I am so familiar with. You are single handedly going to drive my little dachshund crazy with your sound effects. LOL I enjoyed reading your Haiku. It's great.
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
This is the Dean Kuch I am so familiar with. You are single handedly going to drive my little dachshund crazy with your sound effects. LOL I enjoyed reading your Haiku. It's great.
Comment Written 18-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
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Thanks for your comments assessment of my haiku club challenge, Barb.
I appreciate the review.
Have a wonderful week...
Comment from krys123
Dr. Shadowinski;
-Ah, yes, the vampire bat is much held in the realm of mystery that has surrounded the vampires of Transylvania. Here in their natural habitat, as we can see in your picture, is having a delicacy of a frog that he has been unfortunately captured by this vampire bat. Poor frog. Chuckle! But I think you wonder if the that would go for the legs first but I guess is a headman and not a leg-man. Chuckle!
-Great altogether composition with the additive sound in the background creates a relative aura of nature that surrounds the beauty for the ugliness that is the naturalization of life.
-The satori is a comical one as it is a cliché used in westernized America as it is also in probably other countries and quite humorous.
-I even thought that the first line without the words in the and just dead of night would act as a good satori and as being the first line.
-Two grammatically connected lines that are very definitively and distinctively descriptive and expressive with a vivid inventiveness that is very creative and ingeniously imaginative.
-Thank you for sharing and take care and specially have a good one.
Alex
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
Dr. Shadowinski;
-Ah, yes, the vampire bat is much held in the realm of mystery that has surrounded the vampires of Transylvania. Here in their natural habitat, as we can see in your picture, is having a delicacy of a frog that he has been unfortunately captured by this vampire bat. Poor frog. Chuckle! But I think you wonder if the that would go for the legs first but I guess is a headman and not a leg-man. Chuckle!
-Great altogether composition with the additive sound in the background creates a relative aura of nature that surrounds the beauty for the ugliness that is the naturalization of life.
-The satori is a comical one as it is a cliché used in westernized America as it is also in probably other countries and quite humorous.
-I even thought that the first line without the words in the and just dead of night would act as a good satori and as being the first line.
-Two grammatically connected lines that are very definitively and distinctively descriptive and expressive with a vivid inventiveness that is very creative and ingeniously imaginative.
-Thank you for sharing and take care and specially have a good one.
Alex
Comment Written 18-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
Thanks for reading my Haiku Club Challenge entry for mammals, Alex.
I appreciate the read and review.
Take care...
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You always very welcome, Dean.
Alex
Comment from thonnigford09
I love this one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Excellent and humorous. I love bats, that were prominent in my community growing up. Hope to see some more like this one and congrats on your Haiku club. Well written and I would recommend this. Artwork went perfectly well with the poem. Thanks again, Theresa.
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
I love this one!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Excellent and humorous. I love bats, that were prominent in my community growing up. Hope to see some more like this one and congrats on your Haiku club. Well written and I would recommend this. Artwork went perfectly well with the poem. Thanks again, Theresa.
Comment Written 18-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
Thanks for reading my Haiku Club Challenge entry for mammals, Theresa.
I sincerely appreciate the thoughtful comments and six star review.
Take care, my friend, and thanks again!
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Thx dean. Glad to be back. I have been working hard at work. T😍
Comment from Leineco
LOL - I read once that bats are the most vocal mammals besides humans. . .but
at such high frequency we can't hear them. . .which just makes the idea of them
becoming hoarse (gravelly and husky due to excessive use) delightful!
Muffled by a frog in their throat, their high-pitched utterances become less
intense. . .more "throaty". . .ha ha ha
Wonderful word play :-)
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
LOL - I read once that bats are the most vocal mammals besides humans. . .but
at such high frequency we can't hear them. . .which just makes the idea of them
becoming hoarse (gravelly and husky due to excessive use) delightful!
Muffled by a frog in their throat, their high-pitched utterances become less
intense. . .more "throaty". . .ha ha ha
Wonderful word play :-)
Comment Written 18-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
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That's probably a good thing too, Lorraine.
They are quite the little chatter boxes.
Thanks so much for reading and reviewing. I truly appreciate your comments.
Comment from Bill Schott
Your haiku, In the Dead of Night, uses a gruesome image to enforce the bat-eat-frog world we are living in. Totally awesome as usual.
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
Your haiku, In the Dead of Night, uses a gruesome image to enforce the bat-eat-frog world we are living in. Totally awesome as usual.
Comment Written 18-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 19-Feb-2017
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Awedsomke is good, Bill.
I like awesome...
Thanks for reading.
Comment from pharp
Wow Dean,
You never cease to amaze me, this is a very clever Haiku indeed and a fun read, love the satori- "a frog in his throat." Most enjoyable read my friend and thanks for sharing your amazing talent. Blessings....Portia
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
Wow Dean,
You never cease to amaze me, this is a very clever Haiku indeed and a fun read, love the satori- "a frog in his throat." Most enjoyable read my friend and thanks for sharing your amazing talent. Blessings....Portia
Comment Written 18-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 18-Feb-2017
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Thanks so much for reading, Portia.
I'm really glad you enjoyed my haiku.
Take care, ciao for now...
~Dean