Why Anansi Has Eight Thin Legs
Haiku (Please read author notes!)44 total reviews
Comment from dmt1967
I dislike spiders at the best of times lol. Your picture, however, was not only funny but looked kind of cute. The words tripped me up somewhat and I developed a stutter I never knew I had. Thank you for sharing.
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I dislike spiders at the best of times lol. Your picture, however, was not only funny but looked kind of cute. The words tripped me up somewhat and I developed a stutter I never knew I had. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 07-Feb-2017
Comment from Mustang Patty
Poor Anansi!! There he was thinking he had outsmarted the others by NOT being able to do chores. (And he would get plenty to eat - the little glutton!)
Thank you for sharing the poem AND the fable - it was all enjoyable.
~patty~
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Poor Anansi!! There he was thinking he had outsmarted the others by NOT being able to do chores. (And he would get plenty to eat - the little glutton!)
Thank you for sharing the poem AND the fable - it was all enjoyable.
~patty~
Comment Written 07-Feb-2017
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
I always loved the story of this tricky and coniving spider. In African lore he is similar to the wily Brer Rabbit in that he is always a winner through his cunning.But sometimes he learns through a massive mistake! If you have a chance read Brer Rabbit and the Tarbaby I think you would like it. Humour similar to this fantastic piece. A wonderful fable brought to life by your amazing talent. Love Meia :) x
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I always loved the story of this tricky and coniving spider. In African lore he is similar to the wily Brer Rabbit in that he is always a winner through his cunning.But sometimes he learns through a massive mistake! If you have a chance read Brer Rabbit and the Tarbaby I think you would like it. Humour similar to this fantastic piece. A wonderful fable brought to life by your amazing talent. Love Meia :) x
Comment Written 07-Feb-2017
Comment from Alcreator Litt Dear
Fantastic, fable based this Haiku has projected nicely and morally the legendary fable, captured in good flow of thoughts offering ordered visual imagery with aha sense I enjoyed the word visual glow in a lesson put like a psalm.
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Fantastic, fable based this Haiku has projected nicely and morally the legendary fable, captured in good flow of thoughts offering ordered visual imagery with aha sense I enjoyed the word visual glow in a lesson put like a psalm.
Comment Written 07-Feb-2017
Comment from Jackarrie
Hi Jeni
I enjoyed your poem about anansi, I really enjoyed reading the story about him in your notes. It was an interesting read. I am sure there are more unusual creatures in far out places.
Well done.
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Hi Jeni
I enjoyed your poem about anansi, I really enjoyed reading the story about him in your notes. It was an interesting read. I am sure there are more unusual creatures in far out places.
Well done.
Comment Written 07-Feb-2017
Comment from Sis Cat
Yes, "glutton bamboozled," and he did it to himself because of his greed. This is a fine haiku based upon an Anansi fable. I heard a Liberian tell a version of this story. Thank you for including the fable, otherwise I would be unable to understand your haiku which captures the fable's moral in a few syllables.
In terms of structure, your haiku could be clearer. For one, I would not use the word "famished." Anansi was not starving like a homeless person on the street. He was greedy. Those are two different things. I toyed with your haiku and came up with this clearly tell the story while being subtle in the satori line because "stretch out his meals" allude to his legs being stretched out:
glutton Anansi
tied each leg to neighbors' pots
stretch out his meals
I found your haiku and its possibility fun and entertaining, as well as challenging.
Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for sharing.
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Yes, "glutton bamboozled," and he did it to himself because of his greed. This is a fine haiku based upon an Anansi fable. I heard a Liberian tell a version of this story. Thank you for including the fable, otherwise I would be unable to understand your haiku which captures the fable's moral in a few syllables.
In terms of structure, your haiku could be clearer. For one, I would not use the word "famished." Anansi was not starving like a homeless person on the street. He was greedy. Those are two different things. I toyed with your haiku and came up with this clearly tell the story while being subtle in the satori line because "stretch out his meals" allude to his legs being stretched out:
glutton Anansi
tied each leg to neighbors' pots
stretch out his meals
I found your haiku and its possibility fun and entertaining, as well as challenging.
Thank you for sharing.
Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 07-Feb-2017
Comment from Teri7
lol This is just too cute what you have penned. I would have never thought of something so cute! You used very good descriptive wording and I love the art work you chose! love, Teri
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lol This is just too cute what you have penned. I would have never thought of something so cute! You used very good descriptive wording and I love the art work you chose! love, Teri
Comment Written 06-Feb-2017
Comment from Pantygynt
I have to keep reminded that I am reviewing the haiku not the note. Lol. The whole story is actually told in the haiku - only the unimportant detail is missing. No wonder the greedy little beggar was bamboozled. This is a lot closer to the rules of haiku. I don't find a kigo but it may well be that spiders are their own kigo word. Many animals are and no one knows why but some long dead Japanese. These was fun.
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2017
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I have to keep reminded that I am reviewing the haiku not the note. Lol. The whole story is actually told in the haiku - only the unimportant detail is missing. No wonder the greedy little beggar was bamboozled. This is a lot closer to the rules of haiku. I don't find a kigo but it may well be that spiders are their own kigo word. Many animals are and no one knows why but some long dead Japanese. These was fun.
Comment Written 06-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2017
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Thanks so much, Jim. I'm glad that this came closer to the mark for you. The kigo was supposed to be the word "tropical," as to imply warm weather. Perhaps I didn't use it correctly. Again, thanks for your review, I'm really happy that you thought this was fun!
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I see where you are coming from with the tropical kigo but it's hot there all the year round. I am willing to bet that spiders are an autumn kigo because that's when one is most conscious of them in UK. Could be different in the land of the rising sun.
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I thought perhaps I could have used a different word when I read your review, and your reply cemented my thought. Thanks, Jim. You are extremely helpful.
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We aim to please.
Don't always hit the target though.
Comment from DR DIP
What a great fable I always wondered how some spiders had extremely thin legs now I know So glad you included those authors notes it so helps with the interpretation of your Haiku
dip
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2017
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What a great fable I always wondered how some spiders had extremely thin legs now I know So glad you included those authors notes it so helps with the interpretation of your Haiku
dip
Comment Written 06-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2017
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Thanks dip, I appreciate your review. Yep, it would have made no sense without the author's notes. I appreciate your support.
jeni
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dip, thanks for your review. I'm glad I included the author notes, no one would have understood it. I appreciate your support.
Comment from crybry67
Hi Jeni. Great job on this one. I don't know anybody else who could sum up that entire fable in just eight little words. Blessings...Christy
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2017
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Hi Jeni. Great job on this one. I don't know anybody else who could sum up that entire fable in just eight little words. Blessings...Christy
Comment Written 06-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 06-Feb-2017
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Hey Christy, thanks for the great review! I'm really flattered by your kind words. Love you for your support.
All my best,
jeni
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Thanks, Christy. I appreciate your kind words, I'm very flattered. Thanks as always for your support.
love,
jeni
