Say something sweet to me
Sweet nothings15 total reviews
Comment from winnona
A well-written poem. The words flowed well line to line combining easily and forming the message of the poem for the reader. Your artwork and background color completed the piece well.
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
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A well-written poem. The words flowed well line to line combining easily and forming the message of the poem for the reader. Your artwork and background color completed the piece well.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
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Thankyou so much winnona
dip
Comment from Sis Cat
Yes, give it to your wife on Valentine's Day, but first eliminate the double comma after "finished."
I love your use of anaphora with your opening repetition of "Say something," Say," and "So." This adds rhythm, structure, and emphasizes the message of your poem. It is tender, affection, and passionate.
Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
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Yes, give it to your wife on Valentine's Day, but first eliminate the double comma after "finished."
I love your use of anaphora with your opening repetition of "Say something," Say," and "So." This adds rhythm, structure, and emphasizes the message of your poem. It is tender, affection, and passionate.
Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
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Done! lol
that double comma would have really upset her. lol
The sad thing is sis my wife thinks my poems are laughable whimsical rhymes
Thankyou as always
dip
Comment from Dawn Munro
I think I had a hard time getting to the poem with that picture sending shivers down my spine...LOL. "Say something sweet to me..." You've nailed it with these words, especially when you added, "Say it like you really mean it..." Is there any other way?
We're always saying that 'actions speak louder than words', but those words are still important.
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
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I think I had a hard time getting to the poem with that picture sending shivers down my spine...LOL. "Say something sweet to me..." You've nailed it with these words, especially when you added, "Say it like you really mean it..." Is there any other way?
We're always saying that 'actions speak louder than words', but those words are still important.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
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Yeah its creepy hey I am just jealous of young love lol
Thank you as always Dawn
dip
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Not creepy at all! LOL.
Comment from Thal1959
Very well done, D. An exception on your part to go with longer footed lines. Normally, when one uses two words to end a line, in this case day and say, 5 times over the 12 lines, it becomes redundant. But because the other rhyming words are so different in their sound, like ocean, extol and heart, the repeated words day and say seem to give the poem a smoother rhyme to the ear.
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reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
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Very well done, D. An exception on your part to go with longer footed lines. Normally, when one uses two words to end a line, in this case day and say, 5 times over the 12 lines, it becomes redundant. But because the other rhyming words are so different in their sound, like ocean, extol and heart, the repeated words day and say seem to give the poem a smoother rhyme to the ear.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 03-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
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Yeah I was aware of what I had done but i felt in the context of the poem it works ok
Sometimes repeated words work especially in long line rhyme
Just my opinion
Thanks for the review
dip
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Always a pleasure.
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
A very well-written sweet poem. I think those three words is the words we need to hear often to keep us going on with a smile on our face and in our hearts.
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reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
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A very well-written sweet poem. I think those three words is the words we need to hear often to keep us going on with a smile on our face and in our hearts.
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Comment Written 03-Feb-2017
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2017
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Thankyou Sandra those three words are universal
dip
