Changing of the Guard
Poetry Potlatch Challenge-Prose Poetry21 total reviews
Comment from country ranch writer
As life as we know it continues on around us we are brought up short by those whoe are hostile to our land.But in all the hoopla going on around us yet it only takes one damsel in the whole lot to bring a man to the rescue. What you say? She needs what? A jar opened? He awakens.
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As life as we know it continues on around us we are brought up short by those whoe are hostile to our land.But in all the hoopla going on around us yet it only takes one damsel in the whole lot to bring a man to the rescue. What you say? She needs what? A jar opened? He awakens.
Comment Written 27-Jan-2017
Comment from Sefiros
This is very interesting. I enjoyed the fact that the dialogue has different colors and then indicate a change of narrative. The picture of pink-veiled women led me to believe the pink dialogue was from their perspective. Interesting take on man's personal evolution. Keep up the good work.
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This is very interesting. I enjoyed the fact that the dialogue has different colors and then indicate a change of narrative. The picture of pink-veiled women led me to believe the pink dialogue was from their perspective. Interesting take on man's personal evolution. Keep up the good work.
Comment Written 26-Jan-2017
Comment from Sankey
Wow! I thought this was Post Inauguration of the Trump! HEHE!! Good poem mate. have not seen you around for a while. I do need to get back to writing. I did get up at 3Am EDT Down Under and watched nearly the complete Inauguration. I was pleased all the former presidents relented and came to the Inauguration. They followed Jimmy carter's put up hand even in his 90's.
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Wow! I thought this was Post Inauguration of the Trump! HEHE!! Good poem mate. have not seen you around for a while. I do need to get back to writing. I did get up at 3Am EDT Down Under and watched nearly the complete Inauguration. I was pleased all the former presidents relented and came to the Inauguration. They followed Jimmy carter's put up hand even in his 90's.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2017
Comment from barbara.wilkey
I enjoyed reading your poem. I am disappointed though, not in the poem, it's great, but I've been reading Haiku about the goldfish and I just knew you had written a wonder poem about goldfish, Koi or something. But I did love your poem.
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I enjoyed reading your poem. I am disappointed though, not in the poem, it's great, but I've been reading Haiku about the goldfish and I just knew you had written a wonder poem about goldfish, Koi or something. But I did love your poem.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2017
Comment from ~Dovey
Hi Mikey,
I think you've combined the last two weeks of abstract poetry into this prose poem. I like that it has that really ambiguous feel, to where you as the author seem to be inviting the reader to draw their own interpretations of your meaning. You haven't alluded to which kingdom might be preferred or enlightened, however you have given me the interpretation that this woman you worship in your mind has invited you to share her world. Simply lovely.
I find this style to be a real challenge and I think you've straddled the edges of that banana peel (from the example statement) well.
Thanks for sharing.
Kim
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Hi Mikey,
I think you've combined the last two weeks of abstract poetry into this prose poem. I like that it has that really ambiguous feel, to where you as the author seem to be inviting the reader to draw their own interpretations of your meaning. You haven't alluded to which kingdom might be preferred or enlightened, however you have given me the interpretation that this woman you worship in your mind has invited you to share her world. Simply lovely.
I find this style to be a real challenge and I think you've straddled the edges of that banana peel (from the example statement) well.
Thanks for sharing.
Kim
Comment Written 22-Jan-2017
Comment from Leineco
I think you have found your niche here Mikey :-)
This is a perfect blend of imagery used to provoke
and verbiage used to evoke. A semi-surreal (i.e.
dream-like) vision populated by implications and
innuendo woven into a "narrative" that relies on the
reader's associations.
Wonderful presentation! (And I love the sea of pink
pussy hats ;-)
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I think you have found your niche here Mikey :-)
This is a perfect blend of imagery used to provoke
and verbiage used to evoke. A semi-surreal (i.e.
dream-like) vision populated by implications and
innuendo woven into a "narrative" that relies on the
reader's associations.
Wonderful presentation! (And I love the sea of pink
pussy hats ;-)
Comment Written 22-Jan-2017
Comment from Rasmine
This is good. My favorite part was the woman asking the main character to open a lid, and then she winked at all these other women. Probably she wanted to be the helpless woman getting a man's attention? :)
TC Mikey!
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This is good. My favorite part was the woman asking the main character to open a lid, and then she winked at all these other women. Probably she wanted to be the helpless woman getting a man's attention? :)
TC Mikey!
Comment Written 22-Jan-2017
Comment from Pantygynt
I wonder whether the new or the old guard feels that it has awakened in Shangri La, one because he has achieved his goal and the other because he's now free of the responsibility. Shangri La is like that, very personal.
I can't say I like this form mainly because it looks daunting and unattractive, whoever creates it, and I did a certain amount of experimenting with my post on the forum's results section, trying to start a discussion. I do hope you will add your five cents worth. I really don't know enough of this form to comment authoritatively on it. You prose looks like prose and definitely reads like poetry. So you haven't slipped on those banana skins here.
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I wonder whether the new or the old guard feels that it has awakened in Shangri La, one because he has achieved his goal and the other because he's now free of the responsibility. Shangri La is like that, very personal.
I can't say I like this form mainly because it looks daunting and unattractive, whoever creates it, and I did a certain amount of experimenting with my post on the forum's results section, trying to start a discussion. I do hope you will add your five cents worth. I really don't know enough of this form to comment authoritatively on it. You prose looks like prose and definitely reads like poetry. So you haven't slipped on those banana skins here.
Comment Written 22-Jan-2017
Comment from brenda bickers
Hi Mikey,
this is very clever. I am thinking that the first verse/chapter refers to the marches in Washington on Friday. Yet in the crowd one woman steps forward to ask the man to open the jar. All that wailing about equality and recognition but turn to help from a man. I am probably reading this entirely wrong but that is what I thought.
Well done.
Brenda:))x
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Hi Mikey,
this is very clever. I am thinking that the first verse/chapter refers to the marches in Washington on Friday. Yet in the crowd one woman steps forward to ask the man to open the jar. All that wailing about equality and recognition but turn to help from a man. I am probably reading this entirely wrong but that is what I thought.
Well done.
Brenda:))x
Comment Written 22-Jan-2017
Comment from dragonpoet
This poem gives a clear image of the woman's marches that happened yesterday and the possible problems some see of a Trump presidency. It also shows what a perfect woman the speaker has at home.
I like the red and blue patriotic print.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
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This poem gives a clear image of the woman's marches that happened yesterday and the possible problems some see of a Trump presidency. It also shows what a perfect woman the speaker has at home.
I like the red and blue patriotic print.
Keep writing
dragonpoet
Comment Written 22-Jan-2017
