haiku duet (gills-gasping fish)
Haiku Club Challenge # 4 air86 total reviews
Comment from dragonpoet
Each haiku gives a strong image of what happens to the fish being caught and being eaten. Nice nature artwork.
Keep writing
Joan
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
Each haiku gives a strong image of what happens to the fish being caught and being eaten. Nice nature artwork.
Keep writing
Joan
Comment Written 03-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
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Thank you, Joan, for your review of my haiku duet. I appreciate it.
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Any time.
Joan
Comment from Dean Kuch
That's what writing haiku is all about, Andre.
Taking your own life experiences, stepping back and looking at a certain memory or event where you connected with nature in some way, be it profound or subtle, and then writing about the incident as a present tense observation.
Just as you've done so brilliantly here.
I enjoyed both of these very much.
Well done!
~Dean
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
That's what writing haiku is all about, Andre.
Taking your own life experiences, stepping back and looking at a certain memory or event where you connected with nature in some way, be it profound or subtle, and then writing about the incident as a present tense observation.
Just as you've done so brilliantly here.
I enjoyed both of these very much.
Well done!
~Dean
Comment Written 03-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
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Yes, Dean, haiku, as you said, invites me to take my "own life experiences, stepping back and looking at a certain memory or event where you connected with nature in some way, be it profound or subtle, and then writing about the incident as a present tense observation." I am having a lot of fun seeing with new eyes and writing these. Thank you for your review.
Comment from Heather Knight
Poor little fish! I know this is part of the natural order of things, but I find it sad all the same.
The eaglets will be happy though.
Thanks for sharing your lovely poem.
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
Poor little fish! I know this is part of the natural order of things, but I find it sad all the same.
The eaglets will be happy though.
Thanks for sharing your lovely poem.
Comment Written 03-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
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Yes, Maria, the eaglets are happy. "This is part of the natural order of things." Thank you for your review.
Comment from Jackarrie
Hi Sis Cat
I really like your hiakus very much. the do relate to each other and have great satori lines. I love the artwork of the Eagle clasping on to the fish for dear life.
Well done
Mary
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
Hi Sis Cat
I really like your hiakus very much. the do relate to each other and have great satori lines. I love the artwork of the Eagle clasping on to the fish for dear life.
Well done
Mary
Comment Written 03-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
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Thank you, Mary, for your review of my haiku duet. I appreciate it.
Comment from Dorothy Farrell
Hi Sis - two excellent haiku. In both cases lines one and two interconnect perfectly. Also lines three in both cases are very good satori. Satori in haiku one is a very good example of homophone. Two clever haiku - well done. Regards Dorothy
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
Hi Sis - two excellent haiku. In both cases lines one and two interconnect perfectly. Also lines three in both cases are very good satori. Satori in haiku one is a very good example of homophone. Two clever haiku - well done. Regards Dorothy
Comment Written 03-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
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Thank you, Dorothy, for your review of my "two clever haiku." I appreciate it.
Comment from bookishfabler
Well here I am again reviewing a haiku. Well, technically two. what I liked about this was it didn't need the picture for me to know what you were writing about. Great job
hugs Heidi
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
Well here I am again reviewing a haiku. Well, technically two. what I liked about this was it didn't need the picture for me to know what you were writing about. Great job
hugs Heidi
Comment Written 03-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
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Yes, Heidi, I always strive to paint a picture in as few words as possible. Others write what I call ekphrastic haiku, or haiga, because they need the pictures to explain them. Thank you for your review.
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For me, many poems need pictures to explain them. LOL.
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And for me, unless I am creating an Ekphrastic poem or a Haiga, if my poems need pictures to explain them, I am not doing a good enough job. I write poetry that invite readers to create their own pictures.
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
This is pretty damn stunning.The picture only adds to it's great appeal.What a fantastic pair of Haiku, very imaginative and impressive,and expressive of nature x well done.meia.
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
This is pretty damn stunning.The picture only adds to it's great appeal.What a fantastic pair of Haiku, very imaginative and impressive,and expressive of nature x well done.meia.
Comment Written 03-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
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Thank you, Meia, for your review of "a fantastic pair of haiku." I appreciate it.
Comment from DR DIP
Firstly what a magnificent shot of a bird of prey amazing photography In two Haikus you have managed to tell the story of the day in the life of an eagle. well done
dip
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
Firstly what a magnificent shot of a bird of prey amazing photography In two Haikus you have managed to tell the story of the day in the life of an eagle. well done
dip
Comment Written 03-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
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Yes, Dip, "In two Haikus you have managed to tell the story of the day in the life of an eagle." Thank you for your review.
Comment from royowen
Well done Andre, two extremely good haiku, very clever, very witty, these are crowned with two great satori, the presentation is also first class, well done, excellent, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
Well done Andre, two extremely good haiku, very clever, very witty, these are crowned with two great satori, the presentation is also first class, well done, excellent, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 03-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
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Thank you, Roy, for your generous review of "two extremely good haiku." I appreciate it.
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Good one Andre
Comment from barkingdog
I didn't know eagles fished. Awesome!
Both haiku are so visual and have good movement. I can almost smell the salt water and hear the splash. Fine descriptions; one with a gasping fish(clever play on words: air apparent)
and the other with gaping beak eaglets(fish flown daily--nice alliteration and 'l' consonance).
Maybe if I read enough of these beauties, I'll learn how to write one.
I really enjoy reading the Club's weekly challenges.
:) e
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
I didn't know eagles fished. Awesome!
Both haiku are so visual and have good movement. I can almost smell the salt water and hear the splash. Fine descriptions; one with a gasping fish(clever play on words: air apparent)
and the other with gaping beak eaglets(fish flown daily--nice alliteration and 'l' consonance).
Maybe if I read enough of these beauties, I'll learn how to write one.
I really enjoy reading the Club's weekly challenges.
:) e
Comment Written 03-Jan-2017
reply by the author on 03-Jan-2017
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Thank you, barkingdog, for your review. I didn't know eagles fished until I saw a bald eagle fly over my backyard carrying a swishing salmon in its talons. I never forgot the sight. Thank you for your review.