Reviews from

Ghost Ship

Elegy for the thirty-six killed in the Ghost Ship fire.

69 total reviews 
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A very well-written sad poem about a very sad occurrence where thirty six people lost their lives in one night, we can just pray that their souls were saved.

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
    Yes, Sandra, we pray. It was a horrible loss. Thank you for your review.
Comment from rjuselius
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

this is an intriguing piece of poetry dear sis cat! i do'nt really believe in ghosts but this gave me slight chills. i think you wording is close to genius and the imagery rather frightening.
thank you for sharing!
blessings!
Rebekka x

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
    Yes, Rebekka, what a coincidence that these people died in a warehouse named the Ghost Ship. I conveyed that haunting, frightening imagery in my poem. Thank you for your generous, six star review.
Comment from bookishfabler
Excellent
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I had not learned this in school. I had no idea what Kharon was, but I could gather by your poem. I'm slightly confused, is the ghost ship something of a modern occurrence? I need to check the news more. But the poem was wonderful. Great job.
hugs heidi

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
    Thank you, Heidi, for your review. The warehouse where the people died was named Ghost Ship by the artists who lived there. I wasn't taught Kharon in school either, but a cloaked, skeletal figure accepting payment from the dead to row them across a river remains a popular image in our culture. Thank you for your review.
Comment from bertranclan
Excellent
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This is a haunting poem that is well done. I almost felt like I was there. You do have a way with words...and storytelling. Hope to read more like it. But very sad for the victims as this poem really brings out emotions.

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
    Yes, bertranclan, this is sad and devastating. I am glad that my haunting poem made you feel like you were there. My storytelling and way with words enhanced it. Thank you for your review.
Comment from William Ross
Excellent
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A nice write on the burning of that warehouse killing all those people, I blame the city, should of shut the place down. Thanks for the share and have a great day

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
    Yes, William, the city, the fire department should have shut the place down. Nationwide, cities are inspecting or closing similar unauthorized living/performance spaces in warehouses, leaving the artists in a lurch. Thank you for your review.
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Excellent
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How sad that must have been, and how tragic. So many people taken together, so many families grieving instead of celebrating life. Your poem reflects it all so well. I'm so sorry for your loss of dear friends. Sandra xx

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
    Thank you, Sandra, for your review and condolences. Yes, losing so many artists and musicians in one night devastated us. Thank you for your review.
Comment from Pearl Edwards
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

This is a very emotional tribute to your friends and all those who died or were injured in this terrible fire. Love the way you've melded together your emotions with Greek mythology Kharon ferries. Great write Sis Cat,
cheers,

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
    Thank you, Pearl, for your generous review of my tribute to those who died. The fire resulted in no injuries. Either you got out and lived or you remained in and died. Thank you also for complimenting me for how I melded Greek mythology with my emotions.
Comment from thonnigford09
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Sis cat, amazing poem of loss. I am going through a personal loss myself. I liked the use of Greek mythology. The images played out well. I would recommend this. Theresa

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
    Yes, Teresa, because the artists named the warehouse Ghost Ship, and mourners left memorials referring to ghosts, lost treasures, and shipwrecks, my use of Greek mythology played out well. Thank you for your generous, six star review.
reply by thonnigford09 on 11-Dec-2016
    Thx for explaining more.
Comment from Heather Knight
Excellent
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How sad! I hadn't heard of this, which isn't strange because I don't always keep up with the news.
I like the repetition in the first stanza: our..., our.... It's very effective and the sound is great.
I also like the mythological allusions.
Thanks for sharing.

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
    Yes, Maria, other reviewers stated that they had not heard of this fire either, but for two days last week it bumped Donald Trump from the top of the news. Thank you for your review of a sad poem and for your compliment of my repetition and allusions.
Comment from rama devi
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Poignant response to that horrible tragedy. Glad you're okay, my friend. This is a beautiful response. I am sure so many are touched by it.



Love this list:

our youths, our rebels,
our artists, our poets,
our queers, our trans,
our singers, our musicians,
our students, our designers,
our family, our friends.

Potent line:
Your skiff is too small
to carry so many.


Awesome voicing and clever rhyme:
whose skull figurehead screams
and whose hulk
bulks with the treasures of the world--


Love the phonetics here with consonance of P, B, L & M and consonance plus alliteration of T and C as well as echoing K:

carpets from Persia,
tapestries from Tibet,
carvings from China--
eclectically arranged,
like a Marrakesh bazaar,
all highly combustible,
all highly flammable.


POWERFULLY VOICED:
But the treasures we most desire to keep
are the people whose lives enlivened us,
but whose deaths deaden us.
Superb medley of S, W, L and P sounds here too:

Please preserve your passengers.
Helpless, we stand on the shores of life
and watch your ghost ship burn to the water line--
thirty-six souls lost.


Awesome work.


Love and prayers,
rd

 Comment Written 11-Dec-2016


reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
    Yes, Rama, I began to conceive of this poem when the death toll mounted after the fire as the bodies were recovered. After firefighters found the last body, I visited the memorial outside of the ruins which gave me more ideas. I wrote my poem that night. Thank you for your review and for complimenting me for my use of language. Thank you also for your prayers.
reply by rama devi on 11-Dec-2016
    So sad. Love and prayers...hugs, rd