Ghost Ship
Elegy for the thirty-six killed in the Ghost Ship fire.69 total reviews
Comment from Ira White
Well written. I like the use of mythology in this poem. The incident this was based on was tragic and the poem echoes that. Sadly, it could all have been prevented. Thank you for sharing this well done poem.
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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Well written. I like the use of mythology in this poem. The incident this was based on was tragic and the poem echoes that. Sadly, it could all have been prevented. Thank you for sharing this well done poem.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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Yes, Ira, this tragedy could have been prevented. The Oakland Fire Department had not inspected the interior of the warehouse in 30 years although it is required by law to inspect commercial buildings yearly. Thank you for your review of my "well written" poem and its use of mythology.
Comment from valmay
I am so sorry for your loss, and that of your community. May their memory enliven you still through the works they left behind. Thank you for telling their story and what they mean to you.
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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I am so sorry for your loss, and that of your community. May their memory enliven you still through the works they left behind. Thank you for telling their story and what they mean to you.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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Thank you, Valmay, for your review and condolences. What is really tragic is that they died so young, we will never know all that they could have achieved. Their loss left a vacuum in the artistic and music worlds. Thanks again.
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Well it's so recent, it will take a while to even start to feel better. Do the best you can.
Comment from johnwilson
This is a powerful, haunting and sad eulogy to those fallen souls. This is incredible work and there is nothing to change. It brought me to tears. It deserves a six which I don't own.
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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This is a powerful, haunting and sad eulogy to those fallen souls. This is incredible work and there is nothing to change. It brought me to tears. It deserves a six which I don't own.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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Thank you, John, for your generous review and condolences. To lose so many young artists is sad and tragic. Thanks again.
Comment from Mark Valentine
First of all, congrats on being named this month's recognized writer - a very well-deserved recognition.
This is a touching and heart-felt tribute to the victims of that fire. Given the name of the warehouse, your choice of metaphors is perfect. Would that there were some court of appeals for tragedies like this.
This honors their memories and underscores the tragedy of this event by reflecting upon their potential. I love the line about their lives enlivening us and their deaths deadening us. Evokes John Donne - "No man is an island".
I'm sure people will be moved when you perform this live.
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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First of all, congrats on being named this month's recognized writer - a very well-deserved recognition.
This is a touching and heart-felt tribute to the victims of that fire. Given the name of the warehouse, your choice of metaphors is perfect. Would that there were some court of appeals for tragedies like this.
This honors their memories and underscores the tragedy of this event by reflecting upon their potential. I love the line about their lives enlivening us and their deaths deadening us. Evokes John Donne - "No man is an island".
I'm sure people will be moved when you perform this live.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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Thank you, Mark, for your congrats, your condolences, and your generous, six star review. Yes, the name of the warehouse Ghost Ship lent itself to metaphors to describe this loss. I am rehearsing to perform this poem at tributes. Thank you for your review.
Comment from jmcfadden1528
This was an awesome poem! You painted a whole picture of what was lost in very few words. The only way it could have been better was if it all rhymed, but that's only because I enjoy poems that rhyme. I found the statement, "bring them back" on line number eleven very powerful. It summed up all the sadness that was lost in three simple words. Nicely done!
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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This was an awesome poem! You painted a whole picture of what was lost in very few words. The only way it could have been better was if it all rhymed, but that's only because I enjoy poems that rhyme. I found the statement, "bring them back" on line number eleven very powerful. It summed up all the sadness that was lost in three simple words. Nicely done!
Comment Written 12-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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Yes, jmcfadden1528, I wrote this poem in thirty-six lines--one line for each victim. I "painted a whole picture of what was lost in very few words." Thank you for your generous, six star review. I may want to try rhymed poetry someday.
Comment from Franklin Price
What a compelling poem to honor the dead in the terrible fire at the ware house. The reference to Kharon is apropos to the people who were lost; free souls living in an open and sharing existence. Thanks for sharing
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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What a compelling poem to honor the dead in the terrible fire at the ware house. The reference to Kharon is apropos to the people who were lost; free souls living in an open and sharing existence. Thanks for sharing
Comment Written 12-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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Thank you, Franklin, for your generous review of my "compelling poem" and and for your condolences for the people lost.
Comment from misscookie
There are not many times I'm lost for words... this time I am.
My heart goes out to everyone love ones what was terrible thing to happen to so many young and blessed people.
Thank you for sharing.
Cookie
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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There are not many times I'm lost for words... this time I am.
My heart goes out to everyone love ones what was terrible thing to happen to so many young and blessed people.
Thank you for sharing.
Cookie
Comment Written 12-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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Yes, Cookie, I know. I am glad I found the words to share this tribute to the victims. Thank you for your generous, six star review but, even more, thank you for your heartfelt condolences. They are deeply appreciated.
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Peace God be with you.
Cookie
Comment from duchessofdrumborg
"Ghost Ship" is an extremely well-written and thought-provoking piece. This talented poet's work was a pleasure to both read and review. Deftly descriptive, it's lines are woven with the golden threads of truth.
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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"Ghost Ship" is an extremely well-written and thought-provoking piece. This talented poet's work was a pleasure to both read and review. Deftly descriptive, it's lines are woven with the golden threads of truth.
Comment Written 12-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 12-Dec-2016
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Thank you for your generous, six star review of my "thought-provoking piece" whose "lines are woven with the golden threads of truth." I deeply appreciate it.
Comment from Rasmine
I'm sorry for your friend's losses. This is a sad poem full of feeling! It's akin to a cry to the heavens--the underworld, rather. Love your use of imagery of a burning ship on the water.
Happy Holidays!
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
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I'm sorry for your friend's losses. This is a sad poem full of feeling! It's akin to a cry to the heavens--the underworld, rather. Love your use of imagery of a burning ship on the water.
Happy Holidays!
Comment Written 11-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
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Yes, Rasmine, since the artists who live in the warehouse named it Ghost Ship, my imagery of a burning ship on the water worked in my cry to the underworld. Thank you for your review and condolences.
Comment from RGstar
I grew up having nightmares about Kahron.
A tribute or solidarity to lives lost. Regardless of which life, all lives are worth and such a tragedy as I see it reflected in your write.
Hope the poem has brought you some solace after taking the time for its birth out of the darkness of fate and destruction.
Best wishes,
RGstar
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
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I grew up having nightmares about Kahron.
A tribute or solidarity to lives lost. Regardless of which life, all lives are worth and such a tragedy as I see it reflected in your write.
Hope the poem has brought you some solace after taking the time for its birth out of the darkness of fate and destruction.
Best wishes,
RGstar
Comment Written 11-Dec-2016
reply by the author on 11-Dec-2016
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Yes, RGstar, my poem has brought me some solace but Kharon also haunts me. I have been in a blue funk about it for weeks. I am preparing to perform my poem in Oakland. Thank you for your review and condolences.
