Reviews from

The Old Man

A Pantygynt

26 total reviews 
Comment from Cass Carlton
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Yes, I identify with this piece very clearly. I too have been pleaded with to show compassion to unkind, unclean, nasty people because they "were old" and "now it's all in the past." GARBAGE!! For those who suffered, the horrors are never far away. They seldom retreat to "the past". The best I would offer to these sick mongrels is a swift, painless death. When they stand before their Maker , naked and ashamed, they will hear Him say "Vengeance is Mine" And so it will be. Well done.Powerful stuff Cass Carlton



 Comment Written 22-Nov-2016


reply by the author on 22-Nov-2016
    It kind of reminded me of old Nazi war criminals, finally found when they are old and feeble, and brought to trial. So be it! You're weak now, and want to be coddled, but sure had no compassion in earlier days! UGH! Thanks for the great review and comments!
Comment from BeasPeas
Excellent
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This is an excellent poem, Carol, in form and in content. It's true that some families protect molesters for fear of backlash. The Pantygynt is an interesting form and you compose it so well. Marilyn

 Comment Written 22-Nov-2016


reply by the author on 22-Nov-2016
    I don't know why the families have protected him all this time - but they sure have. Our friend's wife and her brothers and sisters continue to suffer...

    Carol
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Excellent
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Too bad they never spoke out, but this is what usually happens. I'd leave him to his suffering alone. He knows why. If he doesn't TELL HIM.

Love the poem. Same situation, and the poet wants to kill him but pities him at the same time. We humans have that yin yang thing inside, where we can feel opposite ways at the same time. It causes a lot of gried in the world, but in this case, he took the better path and left him to his OWN punishment, which he'd brought on himself. He deserves it.

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 Comment Written 22-Nov-2016


reply by the author on 22-Nov-2016
    I was really surprised that our friend was willing to spend the night with the old guy, everything considered. Anyway, I planned to kill him in the poem but I couldn't do it. Decided to let loneliness and poor health do it's work.
reply by Phyllis Stewart on 23-Nov-2016
    Good choice. I think that's worse. He will suffer longer.
Comment from tfawcus
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

A haunting tone to this poem. Age may gain our pity but not necessarily our forgiveness. Crimes such as this can never really be forgiven at the human level. I think a higher authority is needed for that!
This story sits so well with the Pantygynt form. Yu have used it to very good effect. One small spag in the second section - "He whispered then, "(O)h stay,"

 Comment Written 22-Nov-2016


reply by the author on 22-Nov-2016
    Agreed, the higher authority has to weigh in on this one. Not sure what drove me to pick the Pantygynt form - maybe the desire to add a touch of lyricism to a grim subject.
    Thanks so much for the review (and the spag notice!)
Comment from Douglas Paul
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Your rhyme and meter are superb in this. The subject matter gives one pause. I just don't know how people can abuse their family

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 Comment Written 22-Nov-2016


reply by the author on 22-Nov-2016
    Try reading it again, Douglas. I hadn't promoted it yet, but now I have and I'd like you to get some points for it. Thanks so much for the review! I felt absolutely sick when I heard the story.
    Carol
reply by Douglas Paul on 22-Nov-2016
    I am not worried about the points. It was a pretty amazing story
reply by the author on 22-Nov-2016
    Thank you, I agree about the story. Very sobering.
Comment from frogbook
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Wow, a very powerful write filled with conflicting emotions and thoughts. Very well said and I wonder what your friend thought of this spectacular description of his pain. A great tribute to your friend as well as an excellent write.

 Comment Written 22-Nov-2016


reply by the author on 22-Nov-2016
    Thanks so much, and sorry for the grim subject. I haven't shown this to our friend, I just wrote it late last night. He's actually better friends with my husband; not sure if I should show it to him or not. I was going to have him kill the uncle in my poem, but I just couldn't do it. I believe it's better this way. Thank you,
    Carol