Tin Cup
Viewing comments for Chapter 12 "Off The Reservation"An American Civil War vet heads west.
13 total reviews
Comment from Dustybones
Hilga isn't someone I'd want to contend with everyday. The creature is going to take care Hilga, lots of laughs. Now I have to wait until the next chapter. Dusty
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2016
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Hilga isn't someone I'd want to contend with everyday. The creature is going to take care Hilga, lots of laughs. Now I have to wait until the next chapter. Dusty
Comment Written 20-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2016
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Thank you for reading my story. Now they all have to survive what comes next. Could get a little stressful. I appreciate the feedback.
Comment from sandragee
Jess Harper had heard that pregnant women can get grumpy and unpredictable. A bewildered Jess wants to know what happened to his sweet wife. Helga is just being a practical woman. She's the one having the baby, and she knows what and who she needs. She returns from her trip with the widow of a medicine man, and barking orders. Jess wonders if he is going to survive the pregnancy experience. I wonder too.
A realistic look of that time with the most interesting cast of characters. Nice job.
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2016
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Jess Harper had heard that pregnant women can get grumpy and unpredictable. A bewildered Jess wants to know what happened to his sweet wife. Helga is just being a practical woman. She's the one having the baby, and she knows what and who she needs. She returns from her trip with the widow of a medicine man, and barking orders. Jess wonders if he is going to survive the pregnancy experience. I wonder too.
A realistic look of that time with the most interesting cast of characters. Nice job.
Comment Written 19-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 20-Nov-2016
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I imagine he'll survive. After all, she's doing all the hard work. She obviously knew where to look for the help she needed and they need to get things ready for the delivery. I appreciate the feedback. Thank you for reading.
Comment from robyn corum
D.,
I liked this chapter. It seemed very realistic and I think most men have gone through this stage in their marriage -- 'who is this woman?' - whether it was during pregnancy or just during some other time. We women sometimes have that effect on men. heehee Very realistic and enjoyable. Thanks!
reply by the author on 18-Nov-2016
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D.,
I liked this chapter. It seemed very realistic and I think most men have gone through this stage in their marriage -- 'who is this woman?' - whether it was during pregnancy or just during some other time. We women sometimes have that effect on men. heehee Very realistic and enjoyable. Thanks!
Comment Written 18-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 18-Nov-2016
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Yes, that does happen. We just have to learn to live with it. Thank you for reading and for the feedback. I appreciate your support.
Comment from Heidi M
Excellent job portraying Jess' bewilderment as an expectant father and wondering who in the world replaced his sweet wife.
Loved this line: 'words began tumbling out of my mouth without stopping by my brain for instructions'
You introduced a great new character in Oota. Excellent description of her with her 'wrinkled as a walnut' skin.
I have one suggestion in regard to formatting. You might need to make it more obvious where the current post is beginning. You've used an extra space, but many might not see that. Possibly put some asterisks at the end of the 'previously' part, or a chapter number where the current post begins.
You are writing an engaging story and I am enjoying it.
reply by the author on 18-Nov-2016
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Excellent job portraying Jess' bewilderment as an expectant father and wondering who in the world replaced his sweet wife.
Loved this line: 'words began tumbling out of my mouth without stopping by my brain for instructions'
You introduced a great new character in Oota. Excellent description of her with her 'wrinkled as a walnut' skin.
I have one suggestion in regard to formatting. You might need to make it more obvious where the current post is beginning. You've used an extra space, but many might not see that. Possibly put some asterisks at the end of the 'previously' part, or a chapter number where the current post begins.
You are writing an engaging story and I am enjoying it.
Comment Written 18-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 18-Nov-2016
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Thank you for reading and for your comments. I appreciate your feedback. I have added more space between the "previously" and the story. I think there is a way to put that part in italics, I've seen it in other stories here, but I haven't figured out how to do it.
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For italics you can do one of two things: use advanced editor when posting OR you can put in front of what you want italicized. Put after the last word you want in italics.
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I tried advanced editor but could not find italics. I'll try what you suggested. Thank you.
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I figured out the advanced editor and put in the italic. Thanks.
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You're welcome! I'm glad you got it.
Comment from Jay Squires
Fabulous chapter, Ward! This is one of the best I've read of yours. Your images were sharp and accurate. There was mystery with the arrival of the Indian woman and you left it open at the end whether Helga's attitude was preggy related, or whether it was something else. Great job!
braids with skin as dark and wrinkled as a walnut. [Excellent image, Ward.]
reply by the author on 18-Nov-2016
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Fabulous chapter, Ward! This is one of the best I've read of yours. Your images were sharp and accurate. There was mystery with the arrival of the Indian woman and you left it open at the end whether Helga's attitude was preggy related, or whether it was something else. Great job!
braids with skin as dark and wrinkled as a walnut. [Excellent image, Ward.]
Comment Written 17-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 18-Nov-2016
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Thank you very much for your kind and encouraging review. As always I appreciate your feedback. Are you sure you did not find any mistakes? I rely on you for finding what I have missed. I'm a little nervous about you not mentioning anything. (Although someone else did get there before you on a couple of things. Now I could pretend I got it right the first time.)
Thanks again for the great review.
Comment from LIJ Red
Mighta said Helga was barking orders like a drill sergeant. Might not have described Oota as bossy-that's obvious. Looks like a fine chapter of a frontier story. Hopefully it will do better than most westerns have done lately.
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2016
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Mighta said Helga was barking orders like a drill sergeant. Might not have described Oota as bossy-that's obvious. Looks like a fine chapter of a frontier story. Hopefully it will do better than most westerns have done lately.
Comment Written 17-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2016
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I think you are right. It should be drill sergeant. Did they have those in the Civil War.
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?
Comment from heisemg
I have been following this story as you have been posting them. As usual a very good read and well written. keep them coming
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2016
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I have been following this story as you have been posting them. As usual a very good read and well written. keep them coming
Comment Written 17-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2016
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Thank you for your kind and encouraging review.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
I was delighted with your description of the aged Native American woman clearing the cabin of evil spirits. The herb they use is sage. My neighbor is native American and she did that blessing for my house. I have a wand of sage above me on a shelf. I Never asked but she is probably Ute here in Nevada.
I am enjoying your story. X Nancy
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2016
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I was delighted with your description of the aged Native American woman clearing the cabin of evil spirits. The herb they use is sage. My neighbor is native American and she did that blessing for my house. I have a wand of sage above me on a shelf. I Never asked but she is probably Ute here in Nevada.
I am enjoying your story. X Nancy
Comment Written 17-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2016
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I have heard of sage being burned to cleanse a house. I know there were Utes in Utah and Colorado, I don't know about Nevada. Thank you for reading and for your review.
Comment from royowen
Helga has come back with the wife of a well known Medicine man in tow, she takes to waving burning herbs, presumably driving evil spirits out of the place. Helge has returned home, displaying a new aggressive side to her, that leaves Seth wondering about his future, well done, excellent episode, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2016
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Helga has come back with the wife of a well known Medicine man in tow, she takes to waving burning herbs, presumably driving evil spirits out of the place. Helge has returned home, displaying a new aggressive side to her, that leaves Seth wondering about his future, well done, excellent episode, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 17-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2016
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Roy,
Thank you so much for your continuing support and kind review.
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Welcome
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Interesting Old West story.
The pregnant woman seems like all women - hard to please and always complaining.
Men should be used to that by now.
Uses good characterizations throughout the telling of this story.
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2016
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Interesting Old West story.
The pregnant woman seems like all women - hard to please and always complaining.
Men should be used to that by now.
Uses good characterizations throughout the telling of this story.
Comment Written 17-Nov-2016
reply by the author on 17-Nov-2016
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I think Jess is learning something new. I imagine he would be wondering what he's gotten into by now. Thank you for your feedback.
