Tin Cup
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "All Things Come To An End"An American Civil War vet heads west.
13 total reviews
Comment from royowen
A very tastefully written and scribed piece. An episode spiced with apparent destiny for Jess, set up by Abe, (a little unusual for a dad, (I have two daughters.) but, well set up, a short chapter but a goodie, great series, good strong characters and an interesting scene changing plot, quite dynamic and interesting, well done, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2016
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A very tastefully written and scribed piece. An episode spiced with apparent destiny for Jess, set up by Abe, (a little unusual for a dad, (I have two daughters.) but, well set up, a short chapter but a goodie, great series, good strong characters and an interesting scene changing plot, quite dynamic and interesting, well done, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 21-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 22-Sep-2016
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A little bit of an unusual attitude for a father, but I think good men are few and far between where they are. I believe Abe would be afraid of what would happen to his daughter if something happened to him. Which could, very easily, considering the circumstances and the times. Thank you very much for your feedback.
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Well done my friend,
Comment from sandy montgomery
Good work here. I got caught up in the story. I found the main character likable. I did find one minor error where you used the wrong word. "I suspected he already knew or he would not have left us along." I think you meant alone. Good story though.
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reply by the author on 21-Sep-2016
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Good work here. I got caught up in the story. I found the main character likable. I did find one minor error where you used the wrong word. "I suspected he already knew or he would not have left us along." I think you meant alone. Good story though.
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The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2016
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Yes, that was meant to be alone. I missed it on the proofread. Thank you for the feedback.
Comment from lyenochka
Interesting to read. I was a bit surprised as the intro said that Helga was bathing and the third paragraph requires the removal of clothes. The second to the last paragraph has the word "along" which should be "alone" I think. The chapter brings up some worthy questions about love and I wonder why everything was so smooth and easy. I'm curious, is it a trap? Should he have waited for Dallas? Good plot building.
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reply by the author on 21-Sep-2016
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Interesting to read. I was a bit surprised as the intro said that Helga was bathing and the third paragraph requires the removal of clothes. The second to the last paragraph has the word "along" which should be "alone" I think. The chapter brings up some worthy questions about love and I wonder why everything was so smooth and easy. I'm curious, is it a trap? Should he have waited for Dallas? Good plot building.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 21-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 21-Sep-2016
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I meant to correct the part about the clothes before I posted this and then forgot about it. I have changed that part now. A couple of others caught the "along" that should, definitely, have been alone. I have fixed that as well. Jess hasn't had much luck so far so it could be that his luck is changing, maybe. Thank you for the feedback.
