Reviews from

nose sniffing autumn (senryu)

Who's walking whom?

98 total reviews 
Comment from Gypsy Blue Rose
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

nose sniffing autumn
dog walks old man gripping leash
role reversal .... how is this senryu satirical?

definition of satire:

the use of irony, sarcasm, ridicule, or the like, in exposing, denouncing, or deriding vice, folly, etc.
2.
a literary composition, in verse or prose, in which human folly and vice are held up to scorn, derision, or ridicule.
3.
a literary genre comprising such compositions.

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2016


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2016
    Thank you for your review and definitions of satire, Gypsy. I am pleased that many reviewers, particularly dog owners, grasped the irony, humor, and, yes, satire of my senryu. They knew that it is a folly for people to think we walk dogs who turn the table on us and walk us. I would not change a word. Thanks again for your comments.
reply by Gypsy Blue Rose on 08-Sep-2016
    Okay, I get it now. Thanks for explaining.
    gypsy
Comment from DR DIP
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Hahaha can so relate to this My daughter's dog, Gary takes me for walks on the lead as well. they definitely have a mind of their own new smells to smell as the seasons change They obviously have very sensitive noses lol

dip

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2016


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2016
    Yes, DIP, dogs have a mind of their own and take the lead on walks to sniff out everything. Thank you for your review.
Comment from winnona
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I think you should kiss Mina on the nose and tell her job well done! I think you completed the challenge of this contest very well. The words were well chosen and the background color completed it.

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2016


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2016
    Yes, winnona, I should kiss Mina. I am amazed at the poetry I can write when I pay attention to the things around me and sniff out inspiration. Thank you for your review.
Comment from Caressa_08
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Oh, I do like your poem, and your author notes too...And I have an animal companion, too, who kind of rules the roost at my house, even though she is just a cat, as she has such a wonderful nature about her, and truly, Amber inspires me at times when I also write poetry....and am guilty of spoiling her though she calms things down for me, and well, I think Chihuahuas are more energetic than I could take, though I bet yours is so cute being a "toy." And even littler than my cat, and probably has more of a muted type of energy than others of that breed.

Whoever you are...Thanks for sharing & Best Wishes for your entry!...C.

 Comment Written 08-Sep-2016


reply by the author on 09-Sep-2016
    Yes, Caressa, my toy Chihuahua, Mina, is energetic and is the source of love and inspiration. When I learned our poem placed second in the contest, I told her the good news and fed her a treat. Thank you for your review.
Comment from H.Buttercup
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This makes me laugh because my dogs do the exact same thing!

Of course, that's the whole point of taking them out anyhow, so they can enjoy the great outdoors and let you know where they want to go!

Cute piece, I could picture the dog leading the way, straining against the leash as it takes the owner for a walk. Nicely done!

 Comment Written 07-Sep-2016


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2016
    Thank you, H.Buttercup, for your empathetic review. Yes, dogs are like that. I am glad my poem made you laugh.
Comment from Mary Wakeford
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

A delightful senryu made even more so after reading your notes. Your choice in background color exudes Autumn and I found this quite xharming in content. Good luck in the contest!

 Comment Written 07-Sep-2016


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2016
    Thank you, Mary, for your review of my "delightful senryu." Thank you also for wishing me success in the contest.
Comment from l.raven
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I used to have a Dalmatian (Domino)...he would take me for walks as well...they keep us alive...like our grandkids do...LOL...very well written...and I love your story told...Love Linda xxoo

 Comment Written 07-Sep-2016


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2016
    Yes, Linda, dogs keep us alive. Because of Mina, I walked 30,000 steps in three days. Thank you for your review.
reply by l.raven on 08-Sep-2016
    you are so very welcome...xxoo Love
Comment from Pam (respa)
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

-I like your senyru.
-The format is good,
and you have a good topic.
-I also like the author notes;
your dog got you to walk and helped write the poem!
-Effective imagery in lines one and two.
-A good satirical line in line two, as well.
-Good satori line at the end.
-Good luck in the contest.

 Comment Written 07-Sep-2016


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2016
    Yes, respa1, my dog helped me write my poem. Because of her, on today's walk I noticed the smell of autumn leaves more. I am glad you appreciated my satirical and satori lines. Thank you for your review and for wishing me success in the contest.
reply by Pam (respa) on 08-Sep-2016
    It's nice to have a special 4 footed companion; I am glad the walk was beneficial in more ways than one. You are very welcome for the review and good luck wishes.
Comment from rspoet
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is a fine senryu for the contest
with a good syllable count
If it was a German Shepard or a Great Danes,
but a chihuahua!
That must be one strong little chihuahau
Excellent entry
Good luck in the contest

 Comment Written 07-Sep-2016


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2016
    Yes, a Chihuahua! They are strong but small. Thank you for your review and for wishing me success in the contest.
Comment from Leineco
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

LOL - Caesar Milan makes it look so easy! One hiss/click of his tongue
and the dog just submits to his will . . .
while our little darlings are determined to be the pack leader

Wonderful use of the senryu to highlight this iconic "human condition" :-) :-)

Best wishes in the voting booth!!!

 Comment Written 07-Sep-2016


reply by the author on 08-Sep-2016
    Yes, Leineco, many reviewers have remarked that my senryu "highlighted this iconic 'human condition.'" Those little darlings are determined to be the pack leader. Thank you for your review and for wishing me success in the contest.