Softly Comes The Morning Dusk
Picture Prompt for August22 total reviews
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
A nice poem. I especially like the first line. The rhyming is inconsistent which threw me off a bit when reading it the first time. A good response to the challenge, my friend~Debbie
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2016
A nice poem. I especially like the first line. The rhyming is inconsistent which threw me off a bit when reading it the first time. A good response to the challenge, my friend~Debbie
Comment Written 01-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2016
-
Thanks for the comments.
Comment from sage17611
It's amazing how everyone writing about this picture see it in a different way. I like your description of the night ending and the beginning of a new day. Your words are very relaxing and reassuring. The flow is good, with nice rhyming. Good job with this write.
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2016
It's amazing how everyone writing about this picture see it in a different way. I like your description of the night ending and the beginning of a new day. Your words are very relaxing and reassuring. The flow is good, with nice rhyming. Good job with this write.
Comment Written 01-Sep-2016
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2016
-
Thanks for the comments.
Comment from Thomas Bowling
Good inspirational poem. You should use a diierent picture. There are three poems that use tis same picture on this page. When I look for a poem to read i first look at the picture to see if I have already read it. I passed this poem up several times because I recognized the picture.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2016
Good inspirational poem. You should use a diierent picture. There are three poems that use tis same picture on this page. When I look for a poem to read i first look at the picture to see if I have already read it. I passed this poem up several times because I recognized the picture.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 31-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2016
-
Thanks for the comments. This picture is used by a group to write on. Every two weeks we receive the picture to write a poem with it. That is why there are many with the same picture it is a picture prompt group.
-
Thanks for the explanation. Sorry I didn't know. I take back my complaint. Again, please accept my apology.
-
No problem I understood you did not know so I just explained.
Comment from Dean Kuch
Prayer does rise with the sun
Bringing forth life to abide
Soon the night will come again
May this day with God begin
Let in ev'ry heart there be
full of love, not enmity,
hapiness, frivolity,
rich with peace and harmony
Never Him should thou forsake
nor give evil nary break
Read His word, thus be inspired
there the flames of hope are fired...
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2016
Prayer does rise with the sun
Bringing forth life to abide
Soon the night will come again
May this day with God begin
Let in ev'ry heart there be
full of love, not enmity,
hapiness, frivolity,
rich with peace and harmony
Never Him should thou forsake
nor give evil nary break
Read His word, thus be inspired
there the flames of hope are fired...
Comment Written 31-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2016
-
Thanks for the comments. Thank you very much for the poem as well with deep insight we all need to read and let touch the soul.
Comment from rockinm76233
Great read, beautiful words. I very much enjoyed the read. Your relationship with our Lord and Savior is beautiful. And your ending is great. Keep writing and praising his holy name.
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2016
Great read, beautiful words. I very much enjoyed the read. Your relationship with our Lord and Savior is beautiful. And your ending is great. Keep writing and praising his holy name.
Comment Written 31-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 01-Sep-2016
-
Thanks for the comments.
-
Your welcome.
Comment from PoemsOfDD
Danpald, this is an enjoyable interpretation you have written for the picture challenge. It gives appreciate to nature and adds a spiritual side in prayer.
Just a couple of comments if I may. I would suggest a different word for 'come' in the second stanza as you used it in the the first, second and third lines.
Soon the bright day will come
Now the moment to pray has come
With the dawn of new found light
Comes the desire toward a better life' ........get rid of apostrophe.
Perhaps consider a tweak - for example
Soon the bright of day will shine
Now the moment to pray has come
With the dawn of new define
Gives desire to better life
You have also used the word 'light' in the first, second and third stanza. Perhaps change it slightly so there is no over use and keep the rhythm more consistent in meter.
I would also remove the word 'now' in the last line.
I hope this helps. Normally this many adjustments would warrant a four star but I feel you will make the amendments and I like what you have written so happy to award the 5 stars if that's ok :-) ~DD
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2016
Danpald, this is an enjoyable interpretation you have written for the picture challenge. It gives appreciate to nature and adds a spiritual side in prayer.
Just a couple of comments if I may. I would suggest a different word for 'come' in the second stanza as you used it in the the first, second and third lines.
Soon the bright day will come
Now the moment to pray has come
With the dawn of new found light
Comes the desire toward a better life' ........get rid of apostrophe.
Perhaps consider a tweak - for example
Soon the bright of day will shine
Now the moment to pray has come
With the dawn of new define
Gives desire to better life
You have also used the word 'light' in the first, second and third stanza. Perhaps change it slightly so there is no over use and keep the rhythm more consistent in meter.
I would also remove the word 'now' in the last line.
I hope this helps. Normally this many adjustments would warrant a four star but I feel you will make the amendments and I like what you have written so happy to award the 5 stars if that's ok :-) ~DD
Comment Written 31-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2016
-
Thank you for the comments and suggestions. I always listen to your insights and made adjustments.
-
Always my pleasure :-) ~DD
-
Always my pleasure :-) ~DD
Comment from RoostyNester
Very nice poem about the rising of the sun. I liked the poem in the words your chose to use to describe the beauty of the beginning of each day with God.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2016
Very nice poem about the rising of the sun. I liked the poem in the words your chose to use to describe the beauty of the beginning of each day with God.
Comment Written 30-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2016
-
Thanks for the comments.
Comment from pattipac
Dan, I like how you use the sunrise as a call to prayer of thanksgiving and guidance throughout the day. Your faith shines forth from this poem.
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2016
Dan, I like how you use the sunrise as a call to prayer of thanksgiving and guidance throughout the day. Your faith shines forth from this poem.
Comment Written 30-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 31-Aug-2016
-
Thanks for the comments.
Comment from Irish Rain
Awww....this is pretty! May this day now with God begin, has a lovely humbleness to it. I like the whole poem, searching for a better life with the new day....lovely. Blessings...
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2016
Awww....this is pretty! May this day now with God begin, has a lovely humbleness to it. I like the whole poem, searching for a better life with the new day....lovely. Blessings...
Comment Written 30-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2016
-
Thanks for the comments.
Comment from heyjude
Dan, good job on this picture challenge. I like the thoughts about morning and especially beginning the day with God. God's beauty does shine forth in sunrises and sunsets
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2016
Dan, good job on this picture challenge. I like the thoughts about morning and especially beginning the day with God. God's beauty does shine forth in sunrises and sunsets
Comment Written 30-Aug-2016
reply by the author on 30-Aug-2016
-
Thanks for the comments.