Comment from Kate Tompkins

Excellent

I do love a story of comeuppance, and this is definitely that. In general, it flows very well, and the rhymes all work--which is about as technical as I know how to get with poetry.

There were a couple of lines I thought didn't quite scan, though maybe it's my non-Brit pronunciation throwing things off:

believed that where they lived would make their credence better still.
They bought some portraits of nobility from times long past,

and one line that does scan, but doesn't quite work for me:

The moat had taken all their cash and in the water sank

My brain refuses to grant poetic license and wants the word "it" in there.

Also, in the second last line, you need "that stands" rather than "that's stands."

Otherwise, excellent!

 Comment Written 01-Aug-2016

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reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016

Thank you, Kate, the last one, I had already corrected as someone else pointed that out. The rest, well, it could be your pronunciation, UK English is spoken slightly different to US English, and we do phrase sentences differently at times. I've often found Americans pronounce a word which we would say with three syllables, you would use two, which changes the rhyme totally. But, I never change lines for that reason, it would go against my own language. I do accept though, that it makes it a bit off for you. Thank you for your thoughts, Kate, I do appreciate you reading my take on the picture! :) Sandra. xx

reply by Kate Tompkins on 01-Aug-2016

I'm actually Canadian, but yes, there are differences in pronunciation. You're right not to change it for that reason--unless you're going after the North American market, of course.

reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016

LOL! No, I wouldn't try to sell my poetry, the competition is too good out there. I do sell my children's poetry stories, though, and had an illustrated book of 11 poem-stories published by a mainstream publisher back in 2012. Thanks, Kate! xxx

Comment from robina1978

Excellent

I read three previous poems about this photo. I enjoyed yours most so far. A house for rich people, it was the house on the hill. But they bought so much they went in bankruptcy. I don't think buying it is a good idea, you will go the same way. Nice rhyme and meter/flow.

 Comment Written 01-Aug-2016

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reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016

No, I wouldn't want to buy a house that big, think of all the cleaning I'd have to do!! Thank you so much, Ine, for your really nice review. I appreciate you a lot. :) Sandra xxx

Comment from aryr

Excellent

This was great to read. It does great justice to the picture. It had a comfortable easy flow to it. It reflects the reality of keeping up with the Jones for the sake of keeping up. It is sad that people live that way but in reality nothing has changed over the centuries. Great job, thank you.

PS how is your brother?

 Comment Written 01-Aug-2016

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reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016

Thank you so much, my friend, for this lovely review. Ian, is holding up reasonably well, but he's nervous. We have watched our parents pass over recently, and of course he is feeling vulnerable. It's the not being able to do anything that's the worse part. Thank you for asking, that was so nice of you. :) Sandra xx

Comment from Phyllis Stewart

Excellent

LOL! Cute story, not unlike what a lot of folks have done here lately. Reach for too much and lose it all. No one plans ahead anymore... just dive in head first.

The Big House standing on the hill, is now owned by the bank <-- Remove comma.

So if you're looking for a home, that's stands high on the hill <-- Remove comma and apostrophe-S.

 Comment Written 01-Aug-2016

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reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016

Thank you, Phyllis! I have made those corrections, I don't know why I put an apostrophe S there. It was probably another of my senior moments! lol. Having too many of them lately. :( xsx Sandra xx

Comment from Jannypan (Jan)

Excellent

Sandra,
I enjoyed your interpretation for the picture this poem. The image is beautiful. It would be easy to get caught up in the high & mighty--I'm better than you feeling as you expressed. It takes work to be 'normal'.

You did a great job developing your train of thoughts. Your reasoning was explained well. It reminds me of the saying 'all that glitters is not gold.' Also, I thought of 'beauty is in the eye of the beholder.'

I love the image. You present another reasonable side of how living there might be. Good job. Your lines flow smoothly with great rhymes.

Thanks for sharing. Jan

 Comment Written 01-Aug-2016

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reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016

Thank you so much, Jan, for this lovely review. I have just reviewed yours, it was fabulous, the story you saw in the picture, was excellent. I love these challenges, but I must admit, the last one was a hard one. Thanks again, my friend. xsx Sandra

Comment from Ric Myworld

Excellent

Oh, the views you create from the pictures you see, makes for memorable visions for readers like me. Always the right words, a pinch and a shake, no finer a dish can an exquisite chef make. Great job. :-)

 Comment Written 01-Aug-2016

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reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016

LOL! How poetic was this review! Definitely a 6star review! Thanks my friend, you always make me smile! :) Sandra xxx

Comment from Pantygynt

Excellent

Well I've written a sillier one than this. Lol. Yours has more than a grain of truth in it these days. Mine is complete nonsense. I had better go and post it I suppose. Now yours is up it must be time.

 Comment Written 01-Aug-2016

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reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016

LOL, more than a grain, these days. I will go and look for yours. I always wait for Bees Knees, Marilyn to post, and it's always around 3pm our time. I can't keep up with all these different times! Thanks Jim, so glad you liked my bit of nonsense. :) Sandra xx

reply by Pantygynt on 01-Aug-2016

It's up now.

reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016

Seen it, reviewed it, now trying to get rid of the stitch in my side! LOL!

Comment from Joy Graham

Excellent

I didn't even notice a house in the picture until I saw your post. I like that you got the most out of his picture and gave it a fairy tale spin. Too bad it didn't have a happy ending. Always a pleasure to read your interpretations :)

 Comment Written 01-Aug-2016

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reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016

Thank you, Joy. I had to have a closer look, you can only just see it. Thanks for the lovely comments, my friend. :) Sandra xxx

Comment from Sandra du Plessis

Excellent

A very well-written poem. Great imagination about the hostory and future of the hoise in the hill. Anyone who is wiling to buy the house on the hill must let me know. I will be happy to look after the place while they work to pay the mortgage. Lol.

 Comment Written 01-Aug-2016

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reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016

Thank you so much, Sandra. LOL, that will be my job if it came up!! :) Sandra xx

Comment from patcelaw

Excellent

Sandrea, I enjoyed reading this. So often people plan for riches and never stop and think that they should be happy with what they have. Then they lose it all be becoming over committed in their finances and lose it all to the bank. Patricia

 Comment Written 01-Aug-2016

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reply by the author on 01-Aug-2016

That's right, sometimes people aspire to be something they never can be and end up with nothing! Thank you, Patricia, for your lovely review. :) Sandra x