Prosetry
Viewing comments for Chapter 23 "Why it hurts"Story telling poems
20 total reviews
Comment from Judvan2
You made me cry. Perfectly written to involve the reader in your message. I feel the grief, and the way you have moved me to acceptance. Beautiful, good luck!
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2016
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You made me cry. Perfectly written to involve the reader in your message. I feel the grief, and the way you have moved me to acceptance. Beautiful, good luck!
Comment Written 09-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2016
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thank you so much. It has been a hard year with the sudden death of my step son , Thirty seven, followed seventeen days later by the death of my best friend, complications from surgery. I have lots of love and support both at home and here on fanstory. It helps to write.
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You're welcome. Hugs to you. Judy
Comment from johnwilson
This piece rings true with your words of grief spoken to another. I could really feel your sense of loss as you empathized with another one's grief. Good luck in the contest!
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2016
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This piece rings true with your words of grief spoken to another. I could really feel your sense of loss as you empathized with another one's grief. Good luck in the contest!
Comment Written 09-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2016
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thank you so much. Fanstory has been a true blessing to me. It truly helps to write.
Comment from rydere
This one is sad like you wrote, but don't be down in do time things will it better with the help of family and friends plus the higher power too. Maybe I shouldn't be writing this but death is real to us all living creatures, oh yes even tree too. So please cry all you want it is a good thing to do so. He gives us what we can take good or bad but you are loved when you don't think so please cheer up you have a friend in me, and I feel the same way some times too don't let the sadness take you over, it is okay for a point of time but not all the time. He won't leave you plus you will have your family and friends too by your side with love your feeling are important too. And the picture is nice too, so don't think your in this all by yourself and you are not people do love you and he does too, and keep on writing poems keep up with the great work you have touch me!
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2016
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This one is sad like you wrote, but don't be down in do time things will it better with the help of family and friends plus the higher power too. Maybe I shouldn't be writing this but death is real to us all living creatures, oh yes even tree too. So please cry all you want it is a good thing to do so. He gives us what we can take good or bad but you are loved when you don't think so please cheer up you have a friend in me, and I feel the same way some times too don't let the sadness take you over, it is okay for a point of time but not all the time. He won't leave you plus you will have your family and friends too by your side with love your feeling are important too. And the picture is nice too, so don't think your in this all by yourself and you are not people do love you and he does too, and keep on writing poems keep up with the great work you have touch me!
Comment Written 09-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2016
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thank you so much. It truly does get better every day. Life is meant to live and I treasure your message to me. Thank you for taking the time to help me heal.
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You are welcome.
Comment from Susanne M. Psyris
Nice entry into the Empathy with Grief contest. I love free-verse and this one is done very nicely. Smooth flow. Good luck in the contest. God bless and hugs, Susanne
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2016
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Nice entry into the Empathy with Grief contest. I love free-verse and this one is done very nicely. Smooth flow. Good luck in the contest. God bless and hugs, Susanne
Comment Written 09-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 09-Jul-2016
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Thank you so much. Grief is so challenging and different for each person. I so appreciate your words.
Comment from Sis Cat
This is an excellent and a heartfelt poem about grief. I am reeling from the recent shootings and the deaths of my parents years ago. Your poem was direct and honest as you explain with empathy the experience of grief:
"You are dehydrated but still cry leaving salt paths under your eyes."
Your use of anaphora in the closing stanzas emphasized "the lessons you taught me."
You wrote your free verse with a sadness and awareness that spoke to me.
Thank you for sharing. I wish you success in the contest.
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This is an excellent and a heartfelt poem about grief. I am reeling from the recent shootings and the deaths of my parents years ago. Your poem was direct and honest as you explain with empathy the experience of grief:
"You are dehydrated but still cry leaving salt paths under your eyes."
Your use of anaphora in the closing stanzas emphasized "the lessons you taught me."
You wrote your free verse with a sadness and awareness that spoke to me.
Thank you for sharing. I wish you success in the contest.
Comment Written 09-Jul-2016
Comment from Bollie
This truly is a wonderful poem that highlights the need to focus on the memory of love as opposed to the feelings of loss. It is so well written and beautiful. I found myself eager to read the next verse as the poem seems to flow so beautifully. This is a really great poem, thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2016
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This truly is a wonderful poem that highlights the need to focus on the memory of love as opposed to the feelings of loss. It is so well written and beautiful. I found myself eager to read the next verse as the poem seems to flow so beautifully. This is a really great poem, thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2016
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thank you so much, I lost two wonderful people this year within seventeen days of each other, My step son, thirty seven, Heart attack and my best friend Krissie, complications from knee surgery. I struggled with both because I thought they were so unfair. Thank you for reading my writing.
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I'm touched by your story and I pray that God blesses your heart with peace.
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I'm touched by your story and I pray that God blesses your heart with peace.
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I'm touched by your story and I pray that God blesses your heart with peace.
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I'm touched by your story and I pray that God blesses your heart with peace.
Comment from Teri7
This is a very good contest entry you have penned. Death and grief is something very hard to go through with. Very good wording and great imagery. good luck in the contest. teri
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2016
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This is a very good contest entry you have penned. Death and grief is something very hard to go through with. Very good wording and great imagery. good luck in the contest. teri
Comment Written 08-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2016
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thank you so much. It has been a hard year for me with two major deaths in my life. It helped me to put it down on paper. I so appreciate your understanding.
Comment from William Ross
very nice, The bible says not to grieve for the dead for they are the living, that grieving can actually hold the soul here and not let it enter heaven. But people have to grieve over loved ones lost it's natural.
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2016
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very nice, The bible says not to grieve for the dead for they are the living, that grieving can actually hold the soul here and not let it enter heaven. But people have to grieve over loved ones lost it's natural.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2016
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Hi William. It has been a hard year for me with two major deaths in my life. It helped me to put it down on paper. I so appreciate your understanding. I always appreciate your words.
Comment from joannakruk
What a lovely piece that oozes empathy and understanding. Clearly th I e author has experienced loss and is drawing on this to comfort the subject. Well done, a soulful creation.
Jo :-)
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reply by the author on 08-Jul-2016
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What a lovely piece that oozes empathy and understanding. Clearly th I e author has experienced loss and is drawing on this to comfort the subject. Well done, a soulful creation.
Jo :-)
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 08-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2016
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thank you so much. Yes , I loss two wonderful people in one month, my step son, thirty seven, heart attack and my best friend complications from knee surgery. It's been a hard road but I am making it . Thank you for your compasssion.
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
This contest had a clear subject matter. And I think you did an excellent job of writing to it. Very well written. Very personal but I could also relate to it. Well written.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2016
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This contest had a clear subject matter. And I think you did an excellent job of writing to it. Very well written. Very personal but I could also relate to it. Well written.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 07-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2016
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thank you so much. Grief is so personal but also universal.
