Reviews from

To Last Forever

Viewing comments for Chapter 26 "Truth or Bare"
Poems by Michael

33 total reviews 
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
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A powerfully written poem with a message my son really should hear after threatening to shoot (loaded gun and all). I especially like your closing stanza:

manifested destiny belies
manslaughter's eye for eye
justified slow suicide

Well done, my friend~Debbie

 Comment Written 05-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 05-Jul-2016
    Hi Deb....smile.....thank you sweetheart. Well if he's living in his will it will be his last will in testament . Appreciate you. Love michael
Comment from Joan E.
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You must have some time off from work for good behavior or for the holiday, in order to be posting again! I liked your playful title even though the theme is dark and your famous tercets. "Solomon turned suddenly solemn" is memorable and the next stanza with more alliteration is very effective. I hope some of the Fourth's fireworks brightened your mood! Smiles- Joan

 Comment Written 04-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 05-Jul-2016
    I was motivated J ....-smile-.....prompted by acknowledgement....no I'm steady working and pursuing my put upon passion.. It seems we have a little organized crime ring of geriatric mobsters encircling their greatest liability. A psychopath who sincerely believes he's due the respect of kings.....pathetic weakling that he is....never granted genuinely. They run insurance scams....already been indicted once....his partner turned up dead....apparently carbon monoxide poisoning.....supposedly killed himself. Anyway....I'll fill you in When get there. love to you michael
reply by Joan E. on 05-Jul-2016
    Hey, that's material for a crime novel--your next passion? Happy day after and have a productive week. More hugs- Joan
reply by the author on 05-Jul-2016
    Yes ma'am.....that's exactly right.....I'm working on it.....smile....you too....stat safe
reply by Joan E. on 05-Jul-2016
    Yipee! I just wish you had more spare time. More hugs- Joan
Comment from foxangie123
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Wow this is truly a most moving piece of writing and I love the musician you chose as well. Way to go on this fine piece of great writing. I can relate to dwindling away.

 Comment Written 04-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 05-Jul-2016
    Hey Fox....-smile-
    thank you...I was under influence when I wrote it...I've since tweaked it, polished it bit. I read your poem. I hope you're okay. love to you. Michael
Comment from Gloria ....
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Michael what a fascinating poem. I won't pretend to understand all of it, but the general gist I get is we gotta do what we gotta do to survive cause sometimes we just encounter devils along the way.

A slow suicide eh? I guess "they" must've been really bad.

Great job my dear friend.

Gloria

 Comment Written 04-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 04-Jul-2016
    Gloria...my Dear Dear Friend...-smile-
    let me explain. first stanza....with hand over heart and repeat allegiance please....haha..."manslaughter"...in any and every form carries with it a "price tag"...."deliberate-purposeful..."manslaughter" especially so. Now when a ah mess like this...spends his adult years pursuing "manslaughter" as career legacy. well then God created a place for him and those like minded....this per say....like the demons of yesterday...is aware his heart is giving out after all these years of living off the breast of "other" men. and knows what next comes......and there you have it...as I've already said in my poetic musing...-smile-...love to you Michael
Comment from Susanne M. Psyris
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Oh, I truly like this poetry. Love free-verse, but have a hard time creating it to make sense. This is flawless and beautiful. Great job. God bless and hugs, Susanne

 Comment Written 04-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 05-Jul-2016
    Hi Sue...-smile-
    ah thank you...it certainly is real.
    I love hugs...-smile-...back at ya. love to you....Michael
Comment from Slythytove2
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I imagine you're too young to remember Berma-shave signs along the highway. The lay out and message of your work here bring that memory back to mind. It is tough reading. The transition from first line to the next is often stark and difficult to follow. I find myself having to reread each section several times before moving on to the next which puts the meaning and message further from understanding." Hairy-hip" went right over my head, I can't connect it to anything. I feel this piece needs more work and perhaps a lighter touch. I want to point out something positive and up lifting about this piece but if I can't understand it I can't appreciate its meaning, and that is what the writer's job is.

 Comment Written 04-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 04-Jul-2016
    Yea well....maybe you should have skipped to the lou my darling....enjoy your dollar...smile
reply by Slythytove2 on 06-Jul-2016
    You pays you dime....
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2016
    You dumb as quarter...
reply by Slythytove2 on 06-Jul-2016
    Yes, but I make a coherent statements with proper English that my readers can understand.
reply by the author on 06-Jul-2016
    good....I'm proud of you. now... work on poetic expression...then get back to me...I'll take another look...-wink-
reply by Slythytove2 on 07-Jul-2016
    Just tell me what-"hairy-hip" means (in context) and I'll be happy.
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2016
    it means batchelorette no. one was the wrong choice...-wink-
reply by Slythytove2 on 07-Jul-2016
    Thanks-
    Now let me give you a chance to pick one of mine apart. Coming soon-" Apostasy"
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2016
    well yer welcome...its always best to test the fabric before you buy it....or else you might fall away from the truth. whole lot a made up takes place. I'll read it-
reply by Slythytove2 on 07-Jul-2016
    If you can't wait you could go to my Portfolio and sample. Slythytove2
Comment from Sandra du Plessis
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A very well-written poem. To kill for religion, cannot be right. That is not what my religion expect from me to do to be accepted.

 Comment Written 04-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 04-Jul-2016
    No....it's not. But some folks religion is murder. The man I honored in this write , spent his whole life killing......like demons before him he believes and trembles now for tomorrow's hour approaches with his reward.....love to you michael
Comment from barbara.wilkey
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I wanted to play the song, but my I think one of the cats unplugged my speakers. My desk right n ow is too messy to fix it. Oh my!!! I did however enjoy reading your poem. It's extremely descriptive and flowed smoothly.

 Comment Written 04-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 05-Jul-2016
    Hi Barb....-smile-
    oh no....you have to....with all mine...but especially this one.
    I always listen to the song that becomes part of my poems....while I'm writing them. Oh okay....love to you Michael
Comment from Neonewman
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Lucifer's con peddler
Brilliant analogy my friend. I always enjoy and look forward to reviewing your talent.
God bless my friend.
Steve

 Comment Written 04-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 05-Jul-2016
    Hey Steve....-smile-
    ah thanks Bro....appreciate you telling me.
    you too man...God bless you. love Michael
reply by Neonewman on 06-Jul-2016
    My pleasure!
reply by Anonymous Member on 07-Jul-2016
    My pleasure!
reply by the author on 07-Jul-2016
    alright, alright.....Hey Steve...have you released anything lately...? what ya been up too man...?
reply by Neonewman on 08-Jul-2016
    I have not been on in awhile due to unfortunate weather conditions(Mother nature has Texas in her sight this year)but hope to get back to normal soon. I have so many ideas that need to hit the market.
    God bless and thank your interest my friend.
    Steve
reply by the author on 08-Jul-2016
    you got it man...-smile- what part of Texas...? I'm ...here. haha..ah you too Bro-
reply by Neonewman on 09-Jul-2016
    Close to Houston. A place called Decker's Prairie.
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2016
    Conroe...right on the boarder of the woodlands. Never heard of Decker's prarie...sounds about as big as Crockett....haha
reply by Neonewman on 10-Jul-2016
    This is true my friend. It's in between Tomball and Magnolia. I know Conroe well.
reply by the author on 10-Jul-2016
    thats right around the corner...you know its a small world when you run into Decker's prairie...ahaha...were neighbors Brother...-smile-
Comment from nomi338
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The sin that is acknowledged but never atoned can wear the soul down to a frazzled mess. We have an inborn need to be forgiven. Anyone able to overcome that need is a dangerous individual for he has no moral compass to hold his actions in check. He is capable of doing anything, committing any horrible act and sleeping like an innocent babe afterwards. The rest of us suffer a troubled and oft interrupted sleep over a minor infraction.

 Comment Written 04-Jul-2016


reply by the author on 07-Jul-2016
    yes....I've experienced it.
    ah..."they" encircle themselves with lies, confirming one another's sin Saving Grace. Brought ah out in the open in bright white light "they" crumble. but entombed together "they" sustain each other.

    the story of the "Roman Centurion comes to mind for some reason. The "ought-most" world authority at the time....ah I'm sorry I dont remember off hand the exact Gospel...but he travels a distance ...desperate to reach Jesus. When he comes upon Jesus...he bows as before a King. then pleads for the life of his daughter. but it is how he "comes"...saying only, Thou speak it...it shall be. Jesus was moved to tears saying "truly I have never seen such faith in all of Israel"

    I dont really know why I thought of that....-smile-...thanks. love to you...Michael