Three Old Friends. Part Four
More Bitching33 total reviews
Comment from mfowler
I'm starting to believe this Audrey has ice in her veins. After dropping the news about Brian as if it was a piece of information secondary to her main purpose in calling the meeting, she asks how their lives have been. And they don't hold back in telling her either. Susan tells her she's lived a life of broken relationships all because of her theft of he one true love. Yet, Audrey still insists on finishing the meal before divulging the secret of her invitation. The story is reaching high boiling point at this stage. The preliminaries and background details have gradually leaked out. Now, it's time to find out. You must have some big moment planned for us all, Ulla. Nicely done again. Look forward to the climax.
Why can't you just tell us why you've asked us here...?
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2016
  |
I'm starting to believe this Audrey has ice in her veins. After dropping the news about Brian as if it was a piece of information secondary to her main purpose in calling the meeting, she asks how their lives have been. And they don't hold back in telling her either. Susan tells her she's lived a life of broken relationships all because of her theft of he one true love. Yet, Audrey still insists on finishing the meal before divulging the secret of her invitation. The story is reaching high boiling point at this stage. The preliminaries and background details have gradually leaked out. Now, it's time to find out. You must have some big moment planned for us all, Ulla. Nicely done again. Look forward to the climax.
Why can't you just tell us why you've asked us here...?
Comment Written 01-Jul-2016
reply by the author on 01-Jul-2016
-
Thank you so much, Mark. Yes, it is going to be revealed what this is about in the next instalment. All the best. Ulla;))
Comment from Bryana
I'm surprised that they blame only the woman for
taking the boy friend away from her friend, but
what happened to the man? If he was faithful he
wouldn't have gone with the other one.
As always, excellent writing, it's a pleasure to
read your work my friend.
Un abrazo para ti.
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2016
 |
I'm surprised that they blame only the woman for
taking the boy friend away from her friend, but
what happened to the man? If he was faithful he
wouldn't have gone with the other one.
As always, excellent writing, it's a pleasure to
read your work my friend.
Un abrazo para ti.
Comment Written 30-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 30-Jun-2016
-
Hi Bryana, thanks a lot for this great review. Audrey stole Marjory's fiancee and then married him. Marjory has never forgiven that. His name was Brian and died recently in a car accident. Thanks so much for the lovely six. You've made my day. Un abrazo para ti, Ulla:)))
Comment from seaglass
I think this is warming up to what could turn into a cat fight. You are describing these woman with accurate human nature and realistic feelings. Each post makes me more curious of the cause for the meeting.
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2016
|
I think this is warming up to what could turn into a cat fight. You are describing these woman with accurate human nature and realistic feelings. Each post makes me more curious of the cause for the meeting.
Comment Written 29-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 02-Jul-2016
-
Hi Seaglass, I'm very pleased that you like it. I'm really enjoying writing this story. All the best. Ulla:)))
Comment from RPSaxena
Hello Ulla,
Lovely piece of General Fiction depicting its theme, the three friends' actions and reactions, in a beautiful and natural way!
Charming phraseology, and perfectly matching the theme.
Smooth, spontaneous, and captivating flow from the beginning to the end.
Interesting, and the coming part is certainly going to be more interesting.
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2016
|
Hello Ulla,
Lovely piece of General Fiction depicting its theme, the three friends' actions and reactions, in a beautiful and natural way!
Charming phraseology, and perfectly matching the theme.
Smooth, spontaneous, and captivating flow from the beginning to the end.
Interesting, and the coming part is certainly going to be more interesting.
Comment Written 29-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2016
-
Oh, RP, You've done it again! Making my day. I am so pleased that you liked it and thanks for the lovely six. I so appreciate your reviews and all your support. Thanks again. All the best. Ulla:))
Comment from Zue65
Well, this story is getting to be very interesting. I am really curious as to what is the motive of Aubrey in meeting her two friends that she had offended. The author puts the readers on edge and make them wait for the next post, i believe.
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2016
|
Well, this story is getting to be very interesting. I am really curious as to what is the motive of Aubrey in meeting her two friends that she had offended. The author puts the readers on edge and make them wait for the next post, i believe.
Comment Written 29-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2016
-
Thanks a lot for the review and comments. All the best. Ulla:))
Comment from Marvin Calloway
A very good installment. The emotions are real and justified. The dialog, although unexpected, is perfectly natural.
Typo:. . . but that's (how) far as it goes . . . Replace 'how', with 'as.'
You might reconsider: 'Must have done.'
I look forward to the next chapter.
Marv
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2016
|
A very good installment. The emotions are real and justified. The dialog, although unexpected, is perfectly natural.
Typo:. . . but that's (how) far as it goes . . . Replace 'how', with 'as.'
You might reconsider: 'Must have done.'
I look forward to the next chapter.
Marv
Comment Written 28-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2016
-
Hi Marv, thank you very much for the review and comments. I go and correct right now. Thanks for seeing that. All the best. Ulla:))
-
Thank you. Happy Fourth.
Comment from Mastery
Hi, Ulla Fantastic writing from start to finish here. such a tricky plot to play with. I envy you, It can go so many ways...no matter how it proceeded....just let the characters write the book from here on: I love this:
"I ... I am so sorry, Audrey. No wonder you're a bit thin. I wish I'd never asked."
Audrey threw a tight smile. "That's okay. You were not to know, after all. How could you?"
And this: "Marjory almost felt sorry for Audrey, but only almost. "
Great writing, my friend.
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2016
|
Hi, Ulla Fantastic writing from start to finish here. such a tricky plot to play with. I envy you, It can go so many ways...no matter how it proceeded....just let the characters write the book from here on: I love this:
"I ... I am so sorry, Audrey. No wonder you're a bit thin. I wish I'd never asked."
Audrey threw a tight smile. "That's okay. You were not to know, after all. How could you?"
And this: "Marjory almost felt sorry for Audrey, but only almost. "
Great writing, my friend.
Comment Written 28-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2016
-
Awww, thanks a lot, Bob. What a great review. I'm so glad you like it. It's right the characters are writing the story now. It's a lovely process and feeling. You've made my day. Thanks again. All the best. Ulla:))
-
Isn't it great? Allows so much freedom and yu don't have toworry about sticking to an outline etc. Your characters won't let you down unless you stop writing, my friend. Bless you, Ulla.
Comment from Dellabananas
I wonder how Brian died. If it was me, I wouldn't even be meeting up with the woman who stole my man. But it makes you wonder why she has called them all there to meet. Thank you for your writing. Very easy to read.
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2016
|
I wonder how Brian died. If it was me, I wouldn't even be meeting up with the woman who stole my man. But it makes you wonder why she has called them all there to meet. Thank you for your writing. Very easy to read.
Comment Written 28-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2016
-
Hi There, Well Brian died in a car accident as it says in the chapter. Thanks a lot for reading and your comments. All the best. Ulla:)
Comment from Cumbrianlass
Hi Ulla,
I like how you're unraveling this mystery meeting slowly, keeping the reader wanting to know more. It's mean, but effective! LOL!
A few minor suggestions:
Well, I can't talk for Marjory, - suggest 'speak' rather than 'talk'.
"Audrey, do you know what we can agree on?" Marjory felt the pent up anger surge through her. - close space between here and the continuing dialogue.
Susan looked at Marjory() in amazement. "Whatever next?" (s)he exclaimed. - delete comma, and put the 's' in lower case.
Well done! I'm eager to know what this is all about. :)
Av
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2016
|
Hi Ulla,
I like how you're unraveling this mystery meeting slowly, keeping the reader wanting to know more. It's mean, but effective! LOL!
A few minor suggestions:
Well, I can't talk for Marjory, - suggest 'speak' rather than 'talk'.
"Audrey, do you know what we can agree on?" Marjory felt the pent up anger surge through her. - close space between here and the continuing dialogue.
Susan looked at Marjory() in amazement. "Whatever next?" (s)he exclaimed. - delete comma, and put the 's' in lower case.
Well done! I'm eager to know what this is all about. :)
Av
Comment Written 28-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 29-Jun-2016
-
Hi Av, thanks for a great review, and I've made the changes. I'm so glad you liked it. All the best. Ulla:))
Comment from Kooky Clown
Another chapter and another good read I am enjoying each chapter although the story does not seem to be moving on. I know it is, but the suspense is killing me.
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2016
|
Another chapter and another good read I am enjoying each chapter although the story does not seem to be moving on. I know it is, but the suspense is killing me.
Comment Written 28-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 28-Jun-2016
-
Thanks so much. It is moving on leading to where it's going to end in the next part. I know it seems a bit slow. I'm glad you like it. All the best. Ulla:))
