When Blood Collides
Viewing comments for Chapter 93 "Dementia, Diabetes and a Fall "A family's love is tested.
19 total reviews
Comment from w.j.debi
Always the optimist, you look on the bright side and forge ahead even when things don't appear to be going well. Your nephew seems to have a good life. Frank does seem to be losing it. Hopefully, Nicole comes soon so she won't regret it later.
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2016
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Always the optimist, you look on the bright side and forge ahead even when things don't appear to be going well. Your nephew seems to have a good life. Frank does seem to be losing it. Hopefully, Nicole comes soon so she won't regret it later.
Comment Written 18-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2016
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I credit my spiritual lessons as well as the comfort of neighbors to stay positive.
Comment from Selina Stambi
If I fondled him as much as I do this gadget, he'd be using Viagra. ... I love the sprinkles of wry humour. It keeps the write fresh and un-heavy, despite the poignant weight of the story being told.
The write continues to touch and warm my heart, Shari, which is odd, considering it's biographical.
The highs and lows of life have been depicted with honesty and warmth. It encourages the reviewer to return to check out more.
xx
Sonali
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2016
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If I fondled him as much as I do this gadget, he'd be using Viagra. ... I love the sprinkles of wry humour. It keeps the write fresh and un-heavy, despite the poignant weight of the story being told.
The write continues to touch and warm my heart, Shari, which is odd, considering it's biographical.
The highs and lows of life have been depicted with honesty and warmth. It encourages the reviewer to return to check out more.
xx
Sonali
Comment Written 14-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2016
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Thank you, Sonali, for such an encouraging review. My son-inplaw wants to read it when I'm through. Not gonna happen unless I'm dead. LOL
Comment from Word Junkie
Hi Shari,
This is solidly written. It's so sad to see loved ones decline. I feel the pain beneath the humor, which helps to keep the caregiver sane.
No SPAG noted.
My parents live in a mobile home, and as space is at a premium, things are sometimes "stored" in the oven. Dad said Mom's turned the oven on several times without checking to be sure it's empty. I told him to place a piece of electrical tape across the oven control as a reminder to her to check prior to turning it on.
We do what we can.
Wishing you and yours well,
Lana
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2016
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Hi Shari,
This is solidly written. It's so sad to see loved ones decline. I feel the pain beneath the humor, which helps to keep the caregiver sane.
No SPAG noted.
My parents live in a mobile home, and as space is at a premium, things are sometimes "stored" in the oven. Dad said Mom's turned the oven on several times without checking to be sure it's empty. I told him to place a piece of electrical tape across the oven control as a reminder to her to check prior to turning it on.
We do what we can.
Wishing you and yours well,
Lana
Comment Written 14-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2016
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Thanks for the six, Lana, and for sharing your story. I have color coded the TV remote with nailpolish. LOL
I hope the tape solution works, but with dementia she's liable to forget what's it there for. Sigh...
Comment from boxergirl
Serious issue with bits of humor mixed in...fondling the remote was pretty funny.
So sad to watch the decline a loved one's mental status.
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2016
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Serious issue with bits of humor mixed in...fondling the remote was pretty funny.
So sad to watch the decline a loved one's mental status.
Comment Written 14-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 14-Jun-2016
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Thanks, BG. I'm just grateful I can get out of the house for an hour or two and not have to worry.
Comment from Unspoken94
When we were in NYC last month, one of the shows we saw was the play, "The Father," and Frank Langella plays the lead role. He won the Tony for Best Leading Actor in a Play. It's the story written from the perspective of a man with Dementia. It's a painful story of his steady decline and it ends with him on the ground being held by a caregiver in a nursing home, crying, "I want my mommy! I want my mommy."
Your piece is consistent with that painful story and I look forward to the continuing writes. -Bill
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2016
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When we were in NYC last month, one of the shows we saw was the play, "The Father," and Frank Langella plays the lead role. He won the Tony for Best Leading Actor in a Play. It's the story written from the perspective of a man with Dementia. It's a painful story of his steady decline and it ends with him on the ground being held by a caregiver in a nursing home, crying, "I want my mommy! I want my mommy."
Your piece is consistent with that painful story and I look forward to the continuing writes. -Bill
Comment Written 13-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2016
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Wow! Sounds powerful. I'm taped the Tonys and will watch for it. Maybe I'll order a copy of the play. Thanks for the info.
Comment from Muffins
Each paragraph reads like a piece of paper blowing in the wind. You want to catch it, but it keeps slipping out your reach and getting tougher to catch. Frank's decline is like that. You want to catch it, save it but it keeps slipping out your hands.
Franks' decline is cruel because it's not brought on by something he did to himself. Your sense of humor and strength is the best this he has.
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2016
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Each paragraph reads like a piece of paper blowing in the wind. You want to catch it, but it keeps slipping out your reach and getting tougher to catch. Frank's decline is like that. You want to catch it, save it but it keeps slipping out your hands.
Franks' decline is cruel because it's not brought on by something he did to himself. Your sense of humor and strength is the best this he has.
Comment Written 13-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2016
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What a smart analogy you wrote here. You grasped the nature of the caregiver exactly. Thank goodness, he still has a sense of humor too.
Comment from Louise Michelle
This is written well, with interjections of humor and vivid details. I think the cruelest thing about dementia is that it takes so long. Little by little the mind loses its strength. One day it seems as though everything is back to normal and then something else happens.
I know I would not be able to handle it as well as you are if it happened to David. You are a remarkable woman, Shari. Hugs, Lou
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2016
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This is written well, with interjections of humor and vivid details. I think the cruelest thing about dementia is that it takes so long. Little by little the mind loses its strength. One day it seems as though everything is back to normal and then something else happens.
I know I would not be able to handle it as well as you are if it happened to David. You are a remarkable woman, Shari. Hugs, Lou
Comment Written 13-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 13-Jun-2016
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You hit it right on the head. Good days, bad days. Looooooong. Yesterday, he asked our lawn mower man of 12 years, "How did you know where he lived?"
You'd be surprised what strength you have when it comes to the man you love.
Thank you for the compliment. I bet you'd be remarkable too.
Comment from abbasjoy
This is sad, yet I can see the humor at some of the things that Frank might have said or done, but you almost want to cry because you know it is a perpetual downward spiral.
The medication is one of the scariest things to encounter, because of the possible overdose or not taking the medication at all.
I had a situation with a lady at our church, who is in the early throws of dementia. I called her on Thursday, and she was so happy to hear my voice, even though she called me Clare; my name is Joan. I didn't have the heart to remind her.
Anyway, she couldn't remember if she had taken her medication, and she was starting to panic. I asked her when she had started taking the medication, how many was she to take per day, and how many she had left in the bottle. Thankfully
the count came out correctly.
It really is a sad thing to see the deterioration of the memory.
Is Frank in a nursing home or are you still the care giver?
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2016
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This is sad, yet I can see the humor at some of the things that Frank might have said or done, but you almost want to cry because you know it is a perpetual downward spiral.
The medication is one of the scariest things to encounter, because of the possible overdose or not taking the medication at all.
I had a situation with a lady at our church, who is in the early throws of dementia. I called her on Thursday, and she was so happy to hear my voice, even though she called me Clare; my name is Joan. I didn't have the heart to remind her.
Anyway, she couldn't remember if she had taken her medication, and she was starting to panic. I asked her when she had started taking the medication, how many was she to take per day, and how many she had left in the bottle. Thankfully
the count came out correctly.
It really is a sad thing to see the deterioration of the memory.
Is Frank in a nursing home or are you still the care giver?
Comment Written 12-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2016
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No, he's hit a plateau and so far I'm in control. He's good about letting me know when he takes his meds, but if I'm not here to remind him, he forgets. Smart woman, not to remind the lady your name was Joan. That would really confuse her even more. Thank goodness she still could count!
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That's good that he's hit a plateau. Let's hope it stays that way for a long time.
Yes, I'm surprised she did so well in the counting and she was doing it in twos.
Comment from Sasha
I am not sure if I have missed any chapters, I'll have to check. Great work with this one. Serious subject but I love how you were able to insert several humorous sections. My mother had dementia and it was so hard. Fortunately, hers came and went and she didn't have to many accidents. I am getting a slow start to reviewing again. Please have patience with me.
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2016
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I am not sure if I have missed any chapters, I'll have to check. Great work with this one. Serious subject but I love how you were able to insert several humorous sections. My mother had dementia and it was so hard. Fortunately, hers came and went and she didn't have to many accidents. I am getting a slow start to reviewing again. Please have patience with me.
Comment Written 12-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2016
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Oh Sasha, it's so good to hear from you. I'm hoping you write about your recovery. You always find humor in the worst situations too.
Love,
Shari
Comment from Kaydoe
This story is well written about the decline of your husband and sad. Though Frank does funny things at times because his mental status is deteriorating, the reality
sets in that may be your daughter needs to see him before he forgets it all. So many people can relate to your story. I know when my step-son Eric (who had a brain tumor) his mental status declined he would do strange things.One time he ordered all these magazines that came to the house, which I had to cancel. He never remembered doing that. Every Thursday I would take him to Bingo which was about 6 blocks away on the same street. One time I told him I would meet him there and he could go with Aunt Barbara. I waited and waited and finally get a phone call from Barbara saying they are in the middle of town and Eric is lost. I thought for sure that he could remember, just down the street. When Eric first lived with us the doctor's said he had encephalitis. It wasn't until a year later that he was diagnosed with a brain tumor. He had a very rare form of the glioma and did not present on MRI as other tumors. It wasn't until he had a biopsy that it was confirmed and he died about 10months later. Well I know this must be so difficult for you and hope your daughter visits.
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2016
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This story is well written about the decline of your husband and sad. Though Frank does funny things at times because his mental status is deteriorating, the reality
sets in that may be your daughter needs to see him before he forgets it all. So many people can relate to your story. I know when my step-son Eric (who had a brain tumor) his mental status declined he would do strange things.One time he ordered all these magazines that came to the house, which I had to cancel. He never remembered doing that. Every Thursday I would take him to Bingo which was about 6 blocks away on the same street. One time I told him I would meet him there and he could go with Aunt Barbara. I waited and waited and finally get a phone call from Barbara saying they are in the middle of town and Eric is lost. I thought for sure that he could remember, just down the street. When Eric first lived with us the doctor's said he had encephalitis. It wasn't until a year later that he was diagnosed with a brain tumor. He had a very rare form of the glioma and did not present on MRI as other tumors. It wasn't until he had a biopsy that it was confirmed and he died about 10months later. Well I know this must be so difficult for you and hope your daughter visits.
Comment Written 12-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2016
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Thanks for sharing your story, Kaydoe. It must be harder to bear when the victim is younger than seventy. Annoying that doctors can't make a proper diagnosis. I'm fortunate that Frank's legs hurt when he walks and he has so interest in leaving the house.
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At least Frank stays at home. Hang in there and I look forward to the next chapter.
