The Daredevil Girls From Bunker Hil
Viewing comments for Chapter 26 "The Plan"A fantasy novel about good fighting evil.
22 total reviews
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Hi, Rhonda
= What a super chapter.
= Keeping us guessing, for sure.
= Love the great hook at the end.
= Great attention to detail of the events.
= Super writing, my friend.
(*<*) A Smile Is A Frown Turned Upside-Down (*>*)
Cheers & Blessings ... Jacqueline ~ Jackie ~ Jax
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2016
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Hi, Rhonda
= What a super chapter.
= Keeping us guessing, for sure.
= Love the great hook at the end.
= Great attention to detail of the events.
= Super writing, my friend.
(*<*) A Smile Is A Frown Turned Upside-Down (*>*)
Cheers & Blessings ... Jacqueline ~ Jackie ~ Jax
Comment Written 05-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2016
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Thank you so much, Jax! I appreciate the details in your review, and the continual support!
Rhonda
Comment from Walu Feral
G'day Sister. You have excelled again on the entertainment factor. I actually keep forgetting they are kids because the story is so riveting.
Some observations...
"I claim my kingdom here in League City, and this pyramid, the beginning of my great palace.'" (Sounds like on of these weirdo cult leaders to me lol.)
"'How did you become Akhenaten II?' he asked." (Damn good question!)
"Guarding it, where(were) three priests of Aten who explained the reanimation process."
"'That's some true devotion there. No offense, but I wouldn't do it.'" (Hahahaha! Me either)
"'But you haven't reanimated your father?' Bruce asked." (Oops!)
"'No, I've been waiting for the right person for him." (Ouch! Look out Bruce!)
"They don't have to be priests, nor do they have to be willing.'(Run guys run!)
"'No, we don't understand,' Tabby said, 'nor, I think, do you. This is wrong on many levels.'(Hahahaha! You betchya.)
"then looked down at my gloved hands. 'Oh, I guess not.'" (Damn)
One of the best stories I've read in a long time. I love the now and historical combination.
You are a star and i give you six of them.
Well done amiga.
Delia says Kumusta.
Cheers Fez
"'I have no earthly worries,' Bruce said. 'I'm only 12.'( Hahahaha! Brilliant Sis.)
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2016
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G'day Sister. You have excelled again on the entertainment factor. I actually keep forgetting they are kids because the story is so riveting.
Some observations...
"I claim my kingdom here in League City, and this pyramid, the beginning of my great palace.'" (Sounds like on of these weirdo cult leaders to me lol.)
"'How did you become Akhenaten II?' he asked." (Damn good question!)
"Guarding it, where(were) three priests of Aten who explained the reanimation process."
"'That's some true devotion there. No offense, but I wouldn't do it.'" (Hahahaha! Me either)
"'But you haven't reanimated your father?' Bruce asked." (Oops!)
"'No, I've been waiting for the right person for him." (Ouch! Look out Bruce!)
"They don't have to be priests, nor do they have to be willing.'(Run guys run!)
"'No, we don't understand,' Tabby said, 'nor, I think, do you. This is wrong on many levels.'(Hahahaha! You betchya.)
"then looked down at my gloved hands. 'Oh, I guess not.'" (Damn)
One of the best stories I've read in a long time. I love the now and historical combination.
You are a star and i give you six of them.
Well done amiga.
Delia says Kumusta.
Cheers Fez
"'I have no earthly worries,' Bruce said. 'I'm only 12.'( Hahahaha! Brilliant Sis.)
Comment Written 05-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2016
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Thank you, Feral! I always love the details of your brilliant reviews. You go by bit by bit and say what you think, and give suggestions. Now, that's helpful!
I appreciate the brilliant 6 stars. They glow in my heart, Padna!
Tell sweet Kwala, Kumusta, and both of you hang in their and be tough. We miss you when you're gone!
Cowgirl Rhonda
Comment from seaglass
Very good writing. Well explained and now this twisted mind will attempt to make human sacrifices. How the get out of this will cause you some serious plotting
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2016
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Very good writing. Well explained and now this twisted mind will attempt to make human sacrifices. How the get out of this will cause you some serious plotting
Comment Written 04-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 05-Jun-2016
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Thank you, my friend! You're right, it's not going to be easy to get them out of it...They are Daredevil Girls and Guy, though, and they'll think of something!
Thanks so much,
Rhonda
Comment from MTF1955
You have me intrigued on and the you know what they are going to get out of this situation. As always another great chapter. Look forward to the next. Mary
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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You have me intrigued on and the you know what they are going to get out of this situation. As always another great chapter. Look forward to the next. Mary
Comment Written 04-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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Thank you, Mary! I appreciate the review and the wonderful comments!
Rhonda
Comment from c_lucas
You must have your creativity on overdrive. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read. There is good imagery.
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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You must have your creativity on overdrive. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a very interesting read. There is good imagery.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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Thank you so much! I appreciate your comments on the smoothness of the flow of words, because I was trying to work in that aspect.
Have a great Weekend!
Rhonda
Comment from royowen
I'm enjoying you're imaginative series Rhonda.. The dare Devil girls,(and guy) from Bunker Hill, have sure got themselves in a bind at the moment, with a two bit, self proclaimed nutcase from nowhere in particular. He gasses all of the gang, and they all wake up, and Sally and Tabby are missing, where to from here? With a reincarnated Pharoah, at least the dare Devils are inner sanctum material! Well done, my friend, blessings, Roy.
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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I'm enjoying you're imaginative series Rhonda.. The dare Devil girls,(and guy) from Bunker Hill, have sure got themselves in a bind at the moment, with a two bit, self proclaimed nutcase from nowhere in particular. He gasses all of the gang, and they all wake up, and Sally and Tabby are missing, where to from here? With a reincarnated Pharoah, at least the dare Devils are inner sanctum material! Well done, my friend, blessings, Roy.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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Thank you, Roy. Inner Sanctum. I haven't thought about that show in years! Thanks for the comparison.
Thank you, as well, for reading and commenting. I value you opinion!
Rhonda
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Most welcome
Comment from A.A.A.EXHILARATING RIDE
Hi! The complexity and tension deepens, and with it the memories it resurrects. As a still very naïve young mother, we made our first trip back to England, stopping visit to Egypt on the way. It was my first sight of third world reality intertwined with its historical pride and glory. And, it was in war, 1974, I think. Anyway, awestruck I was excitedly taking photos of the amazing street life, particularly layers of bodies clinging top, bottom and sides of buses. And found this little Cinderella arrested. Then taken through this tiled, damp passages way that felt like I was being led into some public toilets! All this rushed back feeling the tension of your Daredevil Girls being ordered up the stairway at gunpoint!
So, I'm especially thrilled to tune in feeling new potential and vast memories stirring anew. And thank you for your research on quotation marks; although I don't have the formal education to see myself using them in such expert and enticing gifts as you share. Thanks so much, happy adventuring, Maureen*&*
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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Hi! The complexity and tension deepens, and with it the memories it resurrects. As a still very naïve young mother, we made our first trip back to England, stopping visit to Egypt on the way. It was my first sight of third world reality intertwined with its historical pride and glory. And, it was in war, 1974, I think. Anyway, awestruck I was excitedly taking photos of the amazing street life, particularly layers of bodies clinging top, bottom and sides of buses. And found this little Cinderella arrested. Then taken through this tiled, damp passages way that felt like I was being led into some public toilets! All this rushed back feeling the tension of your Daredevil Girls being ordered up the stairway at gunpoint!
So, I'm especially thrilled to tune in feeling new potential and vast memories stirring anew. And thank you for your research on quotation marks; although I don't have the formal education to see myself using them in such expert and enticing gifts as you share. Thanks so much, happy adventuring, Maureen*&*
Comment Written 04-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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Thank you, Maureen. You are so sweet to give me a 6 star rating!
Thank you for sharing your story of your "adventure" in Egypt. How terrified you must have been.
Yeah, the whole quotation mark thing is a pain, but it's sort of fun learning something new.
Glad to hear from you!
Rhonda
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How lucky we are to be able to keep learning and having fun, and adventures all the way; quite a miracle that pain oft so blest with new life, leads us forth in facing it, until hopefully it it time to pass beyond the veils. Happy days, Rhonda. Maureen*&*
Comment from Mike Stevens
Another fine chapter, Rhonda--and I don't like the sound of two missing people, although, I'm sure the just wandered off, looking for a restroom--am I right?
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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Another fine chapter, Rhonda--and I don't like the sound of two missing people, although, I'm sure the just wandered off, looking for a restroom--am I right?
Comment Written 04-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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Oh, I'm sure that's where they are. It happens in a huge pyramidal building with lots of open spaces. haha,
Thanks, Mike!
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Yeah, you know those huge pyramidal building with lots of open spaces--you can never find a bathroom when you need one!
Comment from sage17611
This chapter kept me on the edge of my seat with the events that Akie has disclosed about being a mummy and going through the process of reanimation. I can only imagine what the others are feeling. The story flow well, and the dialog between character is smooth which adds to the enjoyment and interest of the read. Very thought provoking and imaginative. Thanks for sharing.
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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This chapter kept me on the edge of my seat with the events that Akie has disclosed about being a mummy and going through the process of reanimation. I can only imagine what the others are feeling. The story flow well, and the dialog between character is smooth which adds to the enjoyment and interest of the read. Very thought provoking and imaginative. Thanks for sharing.
Comment Written 04-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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Thank you, Sage, and I am so happy to see you "fanned" me. You have encouraged me with your review, and I look forward to continual reviews.
Have a great weekend,
Rhonda
Comment from Jim Lorson Sr
Rhonda, I like how you export this disillusioned character. I like the combative nature of these kids, but I am wondering how they will eventually get out of this situation.
As always your story contains mystery, intensity and great dialogue. I am anxious to see how Tabby and Sally can get out of this. Rhonda, I cannot believe we are in chapter 26. You have done a great job with telling a truly interesting story.
Take care my friend and enjoy the weekend,,,,,Jim
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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Rhonda, I like how you export this disillusioned character. I like the combative nature of these kids, but I am wondering how they will eventually get out of this situation.
As always your story contains mystery, intensity and great dialogue. I am anxious to see how Tabby and Sally can get out of this. Rhonda, I cannot believe we are in chapter 26. You have done a great job with telling a truly interesting story.
Take care my friend and enjoy the weekend,,,,,Jim
Comment Written 04-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 04-Jun-2016
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Thank you, Jim. It's good to hear from you.
Yes, the kids are in for quite an adventure. I'm glad you mentioned intensity, because that's what I was going for. Sometimes it comes off a bit to flippant to be scary, so I try to ramp it up.
The kids are combatant and have been for two years. Someone reviewed and asked why they weren't more terrified. Point is, that's what the Daredevil Girls and Guy do--fight evil.
Again, thanks, and hope all is well,
Rhonda
