Teddy the Imposter
A beloved pet goes missing-A Shih Tzu Shi*Show29 total reviews
Comment from giraffmang
Hi again,
Another entertaining and well written piece. IMposter dogs are not to be advised under any circumstances! Scandalous! LOL
As you may know, cats seem to thrive on people with feline phobia - this is so true. My wife's (then girlfriend) family cat did the same thing to me. Evil little bugger!
eyed full bred Shih Tzu's - no apostrophe needed for a simple plural.
it's sharks and finding - its.
and both brother's were not - brothers.
All the best
GMG
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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Hi again,
Another entertaining and well written piece. IMposter dogs are not to be advised under any circumstances! Scandalous! LOL
As you may know, cats seem to thrive on people with feline phobia - this is so true. My wife's (then girlfriend) family cat did the same thing to me. Evil little bugger!
eyed full bred Shih Tzu's - no apostrophe needed for a simple plural.
it's sharks and finding - its.
and both brother's were not - brothers.
All the best
GMG
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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What a great treat to return to FanStory following the Memorial weekend to a bevy of wonderful reviews. Thank you giraffmang for the RR&R. I didn't get to bed until 3am writing this one, and in reading all the wonderful reviews, I am happy to have sacrificed sleep for blessings, any day! I appreciate the catches...Thank you so very much!
Comment from Douglas Paul
I enjoyed your story, Mary. Your sense of humor shows through in a subtle and appealing way. The lobster incident showed that LOL. Dogs do become family members and it is always hard to lose one of them. I saw no errors in your writing
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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I enjoyed your story, Mary. Your sense of humor shows through in a subtle and appealing way. The lobster incident showed that LOL. Dogs do become family members and it is always hard to lose one of them. I saw no errors in your writing
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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What a great treat to return to FanStory following the Memorial weekend to a bevy of wonderful reviews. Thank you Doug for the RR&R. I didn't get to bed until 3am writing this one, and in reading all the wonderful reviews on it, I am happy to have sacrificed sleep for blessings, any day! Lobsters make for great pets too as long as the rubberbands hold! Thank you so very much!
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welcome back, my friend
Comment from bichonfrisegirl
You're a great story teller, Mary! This was SO entertaining all the way through. Loved the humour, and you create such vivid imagery (fun imagery) for your reader. I especially loved the bit about you and your brother playing with the lobsters for hours, only to then see them go into the pot, and your mom saying that she put wine in to numb them ... LOL. Mixed in with your humour, you have a great knack for making your characters (and I do know that they are real in this instance) lovable ... flaws and all.
Your story has heart, and it clearly conveys that the entire family (with the exception of your aunt) has a real soft spot for animals. This is especially noted by the reader with your line "My sister and I were at our respective husband enforced three-dog limit". ... clearly your husbands have soft spots too, being quite generous allowing three dogs into the family. :)
There are so many lines that I thought were great, so it's hard for me to say which one is my fave. Your "Aaarghh" tickled my funny bone when reading about your Teddy with his pirate patch ... clever and funny. "HE BROUGHT HOME A FAKE FOOOOKING TEDDY" had me in stitches, as that is exactly what one would think if in the same situation.
Great job on this write, Mary! I loved all of it! No suggestions for change. It's FOOOOKING GREAT!
Connie
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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You're a great story teller, Mary! This was SO entertaining all the way through. Loved the humour, and you create such vivid imagery (fun imagery) for your reader. I especially loved the bit about you and your brother playing with the lobsters for hours, only to then see them go into the pot, and your mom saying that she put wine in to numb them ... LOL. Mixed in with your humour, you have a great knack for making your characters (and I do know that they are real in this instance) lovable ... flaws and all.
Your story has heart, and it clearly conveys that the entire family (with the exception of your aunt) has a real soft spot for animals. This is especially noted by the reader with your line "My sister and I were at our respective husband enforced three-dog limit". ... clearly your husbands have soft spots too, being quite generous allowing three dogs into the family. :)
There are so many lines that I thought were great, so it's hard for me to say which one is my fave. Your "Aaarghh" tickled my funny bone when reading about your Teddy with his pirate patch ... clever and funny. "HE BROUGHT HOME A FAKE FOOOOKING TEDDY" had me in stitches, as that is exactly what one would think if in the same situation.
Great job on this write, Mary! I loved all of it! No suggestions for change. It's FOOOOKING GREAT!
Connie
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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What a great treat to return to FanStory following the Memorial weekend to a bevy of wonderful reviews. Thank you bichonfriesegirl for the RR&R and SIX STAR RATING!! I didn't get to bed until 3am writing this one, and in reading all the wonderful reviews on it, I am happy to have sacrificed sleep for blessings, any day! I love your reviews in that you share the relevant parts and that helps to make me a better writer. It is so amazing for me to think of all the wonderful writers reading my work from places on the planet I've never seen. So remarkable for me! Thank you so very much! Have a fooooooking great day! FYI, my son is headed to your country on a plane as I type this for a Special Olympics event. :)
Comment from C.J. 16
Mary, this is an interesting, well written, entertaining story, though it was sad that Teddy was lost. As a dog lover, I usually enjoy all stories featuring dogs.
In a story of this length, there are bound to be typos. This is as far as I got:
(P4) much as fun (delete "as")
(P7 ) little ones schedules (ones')
(P7) dad (Dad)
(P8) traveling grand's (grands)
(P8) Sky Harbor airport (Airport)
(P8) dad remarked (Dad)
(P9) dad grew up (Dad)
(P9) dad returned home (Dad)
(P10) Me and my eight year old brother (My eight-year-old brother and I)
Check for other typos, especially with the words "Dad" and "Mom"
Examples (not from your story):
My dad said...
but
I was surprised when Dad said...
I enjoyed reading this. You really have a wonderful writing style. All the best.
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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Mary, this is an interesting, well written, entertaining story, though it was sad that Teddy was lost. As a dog lover, I usually enjoy all stories featuring dogs.
In a story of this length, there are bound to be typos. This is as far as I got:
(P4) much as fun (delete "as")
(P7 ) little ones schedules (ones')
(P7) dad (Dad)
(P8) traveling grand's (grands)
(P8) Sky Harbor airport (Airport)
(P8) dad remarked (Dad)
(P9) dad grew up (Dad)
(P9) dad returned home (Dad)
(P10) Me and my eight year old brother (My eight-year-old brother and I)
Check for other typos, especially with the words "Dad" and "Mom"
Examples (not from your story):
My dad said...
but
I was surprised when Dad said...
I enjoyed reading this. You really have a wonderful writing style. All the best.
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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Thank you so very much, Linda, for your thorough review on this write. I get so confused on the noun capitalization and in referencing my 'proper English book' felt I shouldn't capitalize. So I took it to the internet and found more substantiation to your suggesting, so will head back and clean it up. I thank you for that, and for the keen eye on the other catches as well. I put this to bed at 3am Saturday night, following many edits, but always seem to miss...you'd be surprised at how many I catch!!!
Thank you again, for your continued interest and help with grammar! Much appreciated!
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You're very welcome Mary. I find typos in my writing too. I'm sure we all do.
Linda
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You're very welcome Mary. I find typos in my writing too. I'm sure we all do.
Linda
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Thanks, Linda. Went are you showing up as anonymous Member?
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You're welcome. I have no idea why it says Anonymous Member.
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You're welcome. I have no idea why it says Anonymous Member.
Comment from Salli Haberman
Cute and funny story. I can visualize many of the scenes with the brief and concise, yet colorful, description included!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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Cute and funny story. I can visualize many of the scenes with the brief and concise, yet colorful, description included!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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What a great treat to return to FanStory following the Memorial weekend to a bevy of wonderful reviews. Thank you Salli, for your four star review. I didn't get to bed until 3am writing this one, and in reading all the wonderful reviews on it, I am happy to have sacrificed sleep for blessings, any day!
Can you help me with letting me know what I could do to improve the piece and get it to a five star? Thank you!
Comment from Kooky Clown
A great story which had me chuckling in places and sad in others I think this is well written and most enjoyable I was sorry that your Mum lost her husband and Teddy within such a short time. I hope karma caught those who took Teddy as well.
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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A great story which had me chuckling in places and sad in others I think this is well written and most enjoyable I was sorry that your Mum lost her husband and Teddy within such a short time. I hope karma caught those who took Teddy as well.
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 31-May-2016
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What a great treat to return to FanStory following the Memorial weekend to a bevy of wonderful reviews. Thank you Kooky Clown for the RR&R and SIX STAR RATING!! I didn't get to bed until 3am writing this one, and in reading all the wonderful reviews on it, I am happy to have sacrificed sleep for blessings, any day! It is so amazing for me to think of all the wonderful writers reading my work from places on the planet I've never visited. So remarkable for me! Thank you so very much!
Comment from patcelaw
mary, what a wonderfully told story of imposter dog. I enjoyed the reading of it very much during the middle of the night. Blessings for a good holiday. Patrricia
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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mary, what a wonderfully told story of imposter dog. I enjoyed the reading of it very much during the middle of the night. Blessings for a good holiday. Patrricia
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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Thank you, Patricia. I am busting with the same insomnia! Early call at the Veteran's cemetery tomorrow too :/ Thank you so much for the lovely review and time to read a longer read. I appreciate you!
Comment from Helen Bach
Oh Mary, what a beautiful story. It touches both the heart and soul. It leaves a lasting impression of the deep love your father held for Teddy and how that was transferred to your mum after losing your dad. Only a beautiful soul can love an animal in such a way.
You have a lovely way with words, even when you are writing something sad you are able to thread humour within your story.
I saw no spag or strange characters but I was immersed within your tale so I wasn't paying attention. Nothing threw me out though.
This deserves a six my dear for you had me close to tears and as a kid I would have donned a red cape to help you free those lobsters.
So sad your mum was denied the comfort of Teddy's presence at the end. You are a lovely soul xxx
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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Oh Mary, what a beautiful story. It touches both the heart and soul. It leaves a lasting impression of the deep love your father held for Teddy and how that was transferred to your mum after losing your dad. Only a beautiful soul can love an animal in such a way.
You have a lovely way with words, even when you are writing something sad you are able to thread humour within your story.
I saw no spag or strange characters but I was immersed within your tale so I wasn't paying attention. Nothing threw me out though.
This deserves a six my dear for you had me close to tears and as a kid I would have donned a red cape to help you free those lobsters.
So sad your mum was denied the comfort of Teddy's presence at the end. You are a lovely soul xxx
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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Thank you, Helen. What a beautiful gift you have given me with your review and words. Thank you, thank you, thank you. My very best to you this Memorial weekend.
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You are very welcome. I will look forward to your writing x
Comment from Word Junkie
Hi Mary,
A virtual ****** for this engaging story. What a rare talent you have for storytelling! The writing draws the reader in and holds him until the final word, when he cries, "Bravissimo! More!"
I enjoyed this happy/sad story, and I agree with your brother; that was the best $75 he ever spent.
Thanks for sharing,
Lana
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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Hi Mary,
A virtual ****** for this engaging story. What a rare talent you have for storytelling! The writing draws the reader in and holds him until the final word, when he cries, "Bravissimo! More!"
I enjoyed this happy/sad story, and I agree with your brother; that was the best $75 he ever spent.
Thanks for sharing,
Lana
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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Thank you so much, Lana, for your awesome review. I very much appreciate it and your Bravissimo!! I very much appreciate you taking the time on a longer read. Thank you.
