When Blood Collides
Viewing comments for Chapter 91 "One Angry Man "A family's love is tested.
26 total reviews
Comment from w.j.debi
Hi Shari,
Your masterful writing style weaves in humor, concern, and love. Your snide remarks, especially those you think of saying but don't, lighten the mood and add humor to the situation.
Your describe growing concern for your husband's changes in behavior in a caring way. I am thankful we live in an age when science understands what is happening. At least that helps. I wonder what they used to do in ancient times when these changes happened.
Excellent writing.
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2016
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Hi Shari,
Your masterful writing style weaves in humor, concern, and love. Your snide remarks, especially those you think of saying but don't, lighten the mood and add humor to the situation.
Your describe growing concern for your husband's changes in behavior in a caring way. I am thankful we live in an age when science understands what is happening. At least that helps. I wonder what they used to do in ancient times when these changes happened.
Excellent writing.
Comment Written 11-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 12-Jun-2016
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Aren't you a doll! Another sixer. (I've reviewing backwards)
Dementia and Alzheimer's were called senility at one time. I suspect a long time ago, they were consigned to a loony bin. Sad.
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Well deserved both times.
Comment from Mary Wakeford
Ah, this sounds all too familiar...I have a friend going through this with her husband. So challenging. A really terrific read and the reader is pulled literally into the marriage from the get go, even the scene with the daughter was so natural and familiar. Excellent read. Just one suggestion below:
He cut off a car in Walmart's, one headed for the parking spot he wanted. -> He cut off a car in the Walmart parking lot, it was headed for the spot he wanted.
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2016
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Ah, this sounds all too familiar...I have a friend going through this with her husband. So challenging. A really terrific read and the reader is pulled literally into the marriage from the get go, even the scene with the daughter was so natural and familiar. Excellent read. Just one suggestion below:
He cut off a car in Walmart's, one headed for the parking spot he wanted. -> He cut off a car in the Walmart parking lot, it was headed for the spot he wanted.
Comment Written 02-Jun-2016
reply by the author on 02-Jun-2016
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Thanks, Mary. Good suggestion. I'll use a variation of it. :-)
Comment from Helen Bach
Oh Shari, this is terrific writing that sadly puts us the reader squarely in a difficult position and one that you have lived through. To witness such a change in a loved one can be so unsettling at best and devastating at worst. The beginnings of an organic brain disease often presents this way and although your humour is very funny I understand it can also be a coping mechanism. I felt sad reading through this as I have worked in Memory assessment clinics and understand the impact this can have. I hope you had some support for yourself.
I close read this and it seems spag free.
(I cringed. Frank shuddered. The doctor continued.) was the only piece I noticed. I cringed(,) Frank shuddered(,) the Doctor continued. You are probably a better editor than I am and never sure whether doctor should be capitalised. Short sentences work and I use them myself but I'm not sure if comma's would be better. What do you think? It would help me too xxx
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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Oh Shari, this is terrific writing that sadly puts us the reader squarely in a difficult position and one that you have lived through. To witness such a change in a loved one can be so unsettling at best and devastating at worst. The beginnings of an organic brain disease often presents this way and although your humour is very funny I understand it can also be a coping mechanism. I felt sad reading through this as I have worked in Memory assessment clinics and understand the impact this can have. I hope you had some support for yourself.
I close read this and it seems spag free.
(I cringed. Frank shuddered. The doctor continued.) was the only piece I noticed. I cringed(,) Frank shuddered(,) the Doctor continued. You are probably a better editor than I am and never sure whether doctor should be capitalised. Short sentences work and I use them myself but I'm not sure if comma's would be better. What do you think? It would help me too xxx
Comment Written 30-May-2016
reply by the author on 30-May-2016
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Thanks, Helen. I have a lot of close women friend in the community who are there for me if I need it. As the punctuation, I suspect either way is okay. I liked the short sentences. For me it read as a chain reaction. Do what moves you, I say.
Shari xxx
Comment from Leen1
Oh my, this is truly an unexpected circumstance. Frank's change in behavior is certainly cause to be concerned. I am curious as what the cause may be. Another greatly interesting and concerning chapter.
reply by the author on 29-May-2016
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Oh my, this is truly an unexpected circumstance. Frank's change in behavior is certainly cause to be concerned. I am curious as what the cause may be. Another greatly interesting and concerning chapter.
Comment Written 29-May-2016
reply by the author on 29-May-2016
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Thanks, Leen. I'm poking through old medical records for accuracy.
Comment from konni
Well-written and developed. Kept my interest.
A few suggestions:
Best speaker attribution is "said" (it doesn't explain dialogue and is virtually invisible)
"she checked in" (THE NURSE CHECKED IN)"?
"How did you know" (SHE)
"eight years he drove (HE'D DRIVEN)
I liked your sense of humor. It's an especially good foil in a heart-rending situation/story like this.
reply by the author on 29-May-2016
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Well-written and developed. Kept my interest.
A few suggestions:
Best speaker attribution is "said" (it doesn't explain dialogue and is virtually invisible)
"she checked in" (THE NURSE CHECKED IN)"?
"How did you know" (SHE)
"eight years he drove (HE'D DRIVEN)
I liked your sense of humor. It's an especially good foil in a heart-rending situation/story like this.
Comment Written 29-May-2016
reply by the author on 29-May-2016
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Thank you so much for the corrections and lovely comments. You're a new name to me, so welcome to FS.
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Thank you for the welcome and the nomination. You're welcome for the review.
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Seems "people need to be told how stupid they are" indicates how ignorant the man speaking those words is.
His day will come in a big way. They always do to people like him.
Well written story with an interesting story line included.
reply by the author on 29-May-2016
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Seems "people need to be told how stupid they are" indicates how ignorant the man speaking those words is.
His day will come in a big way. They always do to people like him.
Well written story with an interesting story line included.
Comment Written 29-May-2016
reply by the author on 29-May-2016
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LOL. Ignorant people in my life would include husband, daughter, and son-in-law. What goes around comes around. Thanks, Brett for reading and commenting.
Trust me, I've done the ignorant thing too with a doctor's receptionist who insisted I co-pay for a shot. This happened three times and I always proved her wrong. On the fourth time I lost it!
Comment from mermaids
Often with Alzheimer's, people do become crabby and it is very unlike them. The problem with his heel is so sad, another problem to add to his diabetes. Many can relate to this part of your story.
reply by the author on 28-May-2016
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Often with Alzheimer's, people do become crabby and it is very unlike them. The problem with his heel is so sad, another problem to add to his diabetes. Many can relate to this part of your story.
Comment Written 28-May-2016
reply by the author on 28-May-2016
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Thanks, mermaids. He had those two health issues that made it difficult for me to figure out the cause.
Comment from Kaydoe
This is a story that held my interest and there were times I laughed, especially
about the graft from the corpse and your reaction. It 's no fun getting old and I think some elderly people become impatient. This may be early signs of mental
status changes and if it worsens check with his doctor. Sounds like this is really outside his character. Check his thyroid levels because this effects mental status and mood. May need a work up!
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
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This is a story that held my interest and there were times I laughed, especially
about the graft from the corpse and your reaction. It 's no fun getting old and I think some elderly people become impatient. This may be early signs of mental
status changes and if it worsens check with his doctor. Sounds like this is really outside his character. Check his thyroid levels because this effects mental status and mood. May need a work up!
Comment Written 27-May-2016
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
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Thyroid was my first thought. Thanks for reminding me so I can be sure to include it in the next chapter. Unfortunately, that wasn't the problem. It would have been so easy to fix.
Thank you so much, Kay, for the six.
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
How hard it must have been to see your husband changing like that, and then finding out why. Mark used to have a tee shirt that said, "Life is hard. Then you die." Very true. It's a real challenge when you get older. Be grateful for your health.
I had achilles tendonitis in my twenties. The doctor fixed it with several treatments of sonic energy... forget what he called it. But I had to drop out of college for one term to have it treated because it hurt so much to walk that I couldn't walk to classes.
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
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How hard it must have been to see your husband changing like that, and then finding out why. Mark used to have a tee shirt that said, "Life is hard. Then you die." Very true. It's a real challenge when you get older. Be grateful for your health.
I had achilles tendonitis in my twenties. The doctor fixed it with several treatments of sonic energy... forget what he called it. But I had to drop out of college for one term to have it treated because it hurt so much to walk that I couldn't walk to classes.
Comment Written 27-May-2016
reply by the author on 27-May-2016
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I suffered pain from a heel spur for a year before deciding to risk surgery. Fortunately, it turned out well, but I had to go to my high school reunion wearing a big padded shoe!
Except for his sense of humor and unconditional love for me, he continues to change. Hate to go anywhere anymore. For the most part, he watches TV all day.
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My hubby just found out he has bunions on his toes and spurs on his thumbs. Hand and foot surgery have to be the worst!
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Kind of like hoof and hand disease. Oh well, he can't kick and slap you around for awhile. LOL
Comment from Muffins
When sickness affects the mind of a love one, it's like living with a stranger who happens to have your love one's face. I can feel the confusion and frustration dealing with this new experience. The examples are tough to read as I imagine they were tough to live with.
reply by the author on 28-May-2016
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When sickness affects the mind of a love one, it's like living with a stranger who happens to have your love one's face. I can feel the confusion and frustration dealing with this new experience. The examples are tough to read as I imagine they were tough to live with.
Comment Written 27-May-2016
reply by the author on 28-May-2016
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Good analogy, Muffins. He certainly isn't the man I married when it comes to going places.
