Comment from Joan E.

Excellent

You took on a very credible persona and conveyed the lesson well in this story poem. I enjoyed your rhymed quatrains and the picture to match your description of "a small child". Cheers- Joan

 Comment Written 04-Apr-2016

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reply by the author on 05-Apr-2016

Hi Joan. Thank you friend, for those comments and observations, and your generous review of Dreads and Tatts.. Warmest regards, Marijke :o)

Comment from ~Dovey

Excellent

I absolutely love this poem on so many levels! First, the message is strong and important. How many of us actually get to find proof in our lives of that age old adage. I've actually heard a preacher do a sermon that I found offensive because I couldn't get past the fact the fact that he was judging the young man in his story based on how he looked, not who he was.

Your rhyme is perfect and this is such an enjoyable read! My favorite lines, they are so true:

Some passenger laughed others turned their heads
Yet others stared into space
Teenagers texted on their phones
No expressions on their face

Excellent work! Thanks for sharing!

Kim

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2016

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reply by the author on 03-Apr-2016

Hi Kim. I'm so pleased you loved the poem. Yes, it is so easy to prejudge on appearance. And yes, the watch people on buses, trains and anywhere, is a favourite hobby of mine. Always interesting and intriguing. Thanks again for your positive and generous feedback. Warmest regards, Marijke :o)

Comment from Leineco

Excellent

I think what I like most about this poem is that the
event itself was worthy of being lauded. . .what I
mean is, all too often we take good behavior and
good news for granted. We seem conditioned to
take note of things we can complain about - this
was a great example of "and the moral is..." poetry.

(not to mention, validation of the well known adage :-)

 Comment Written 02-Apr-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Apr-2016

Thank you, JLeineco, for those obserrvations (I totally agree) and your generous review. Warmest regards, Marijke :o)

Comment from Douglas Paul

Excellent

This a touching story. I guess you can't judge a book by it's cover. Your poem flows well making this a pleasant read. I am a big fan of simple kindness

 Comment Written 02-Apr-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Apr-2016

Hi Douglas. I like that term 'simple kindness', DP. Thank you so much for your kind comments and observations and your generous review and ratings. Warmest regards,. Marijke :o)

Comment from Dawn of Tomorrow

Excellent

Great way of sharing that observation. Most young people do not notice anything but themselves so that was very kind of the young man. I like where you went with this one. Nice work.

 Comment Written 02-Apr-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Apr-2016

Hi Dawn. Thank you so much for your kind comments and observations and your generous review and ratings. Warmest regards,. Marijke :o)

Comment from AnnaLinda

Excellent

Marijke,

I appreciate the fact that you shared this lesson in a poem
with us. I think you did a fantastic job of conveying the
message with the rhymes on alternating lines. Is that a
b/d rhyme scheme?

Speaking in the voice of this woman works well and it
felt like I was right there on the train...seeing the various
people who were indifferent, busy and uncaring except
this one person.

I particularly liked the stanza where the woman reflects
after she was home...
This is very well written,

Linda

 Comment Written 02-Apr-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Apr-2016

Hi Linda. Thank you so much for your kind comments and observations (abcb rhyme?) and your generous review and ratings. Warmest regards, my friend. Marijke :o)

Comment from Eric1

Excellent

Hi fiona, this is a sad indictment of the non caring society we live in today, I wouldn't have hesitated to give up my seat for a lady - elderly or not, you wonderful well structured poem tells the story in brilliant rhyming verse, the rhythm and flow are excellent my friend.

 Comment Written 02-Apr-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Apr-2016

Hi Eric, thank you for reading and for your kind and generous review. Warmest regards, Marijke :o)

reply by Eric1 on 03-Apr-2016

You are very welcome my friend.

Comment from robina1978

Excellent

Nice to see you posted again. The image is great and complements your poem very well. An excellent and well written story you told in this poem. A youngster offered his chair to an old lady. You would not expect this from his looks. Nice rhyme and flow all the way.

 Comment Written 02-Apr-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Apr-2016

Hi Ine, thank you for reading and for your kind and generous review. Warmest regards, Marijke :o)

Comment from lindafisher

Excellent

I really enjoyed your poem Fionageorge. The rhyme was rhythm were easy to read with no effort at all. Your story is one that I see often as I travel to work on a school bus.

 Comment Written 02-Apr-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Apr-2016

Hi Linda, thank you for reading and for your kind and generous review. Warmest regards, Marijke :o)

Comment from William Ross

Excellent

a good poem and write a message for all as to not judge a person by the way they look. Great rhyming and great read flows right along. thanks for the share.

 Comment Written 02-Apr-2016

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reply by the author on 02-Apr-2016

Hi William, thank you for reading and for your kind and generous review. Warmest regards, Marijke :o)