A Promise Kept
She never lost her faith.43 total reviews
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Wonderful story, beautifully told. He WAS there with you, even though his body had died. God allowed him to be with you when you needed him. A real tear jerker. Gotta be the winner. :)
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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Wonderful story, beautifully told. He WAS there with you, even though his body had died. God allowed him to be with you when you needed him. A real tear jerker. Gotta be the winner. :)
Comment Written 27-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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Thank you for your kind review and the six stars. They are appreciated. This is not a true story but I have heard of such things happening.
Comment from Beverly Botelho
http://www.fanstory.com/help/helppanel.htm
This is a beautiful story, and fits the category beautifully. I had tears running down my cheeks at the end: indicative of a powerful story!
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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http://www.fanstory.com/help/helppanel.htm
This is a beautiful story, and fits the category beautifully. I had tears running down my cheeks at the end: indicative of a powerful story!
Comment Written 27-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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Thank you for the kind review and the five stars. I'm so glad you liked the story. I know I rushed too fast writing it. I did go back and edit some the next day.
Comment from ioana.u
It's a very emotional story. And it's at the same time spiritual and anchored in everyday reality. It mixed sadness with hope and faith perfectly.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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It's a very emotional story. And it's at the same time spiritual and anchored in everyday reality. It mixed sadness with hope and faith perfectly.
Comment Written 27-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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Thank you for the five stars and the great review. This is not a true story but I have heard dof such things happening.
Comment from melyuki
Hi prettybluebird thanks for sharing this riveting story which held my attention on the edge of my seat from the beginning to end. Have no idea if it is real or fiction, but it is packed with emotion and beautifully penned. Having faith in someone, trusting them to honor their word means so much and it's sad if that is lost between two souls. Your story is realistic and though very sad that Fred passed, your ending brings to life that true meaning of faith. well done and very best of luck in the contest.. great story and much enjoyed. cheers and smiles melxx
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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Hi prettybluebird thanks for sharing this riveting story which held my attention on the edge of my seat from the beginning to end. Have no idea if it is real or fiction, but it is packed with emotion and beautifully penned. Having faith in someone, trusting them to honor their word means so much and it's sad if that is lost between two souls. Your story is realistic and though very sad that Fred passed, your ending brings to life that true meaning of faith. well done and very best of luck in the contest.. great story and much enjoyed. cheers and smiles melxx
Comment Written 27-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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Thank you. The story is fiction, but I suppose it could happen. You often hear of things like this. I want to thank you for the six stars, they are appreciated.
Comment from Helen Bach
A well written story packed with meaning. Your words held me from beginning to end. I expect this to do well in the contest. Good luck Helen x
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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A well written story packed with meaning. Your words held me from beginning to end. I expect this to do well in the contest. Good luck Helen x
Comment Written 27-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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Thank you. This is not a true story but I have heard of things such as this happening. I'm glad you enjoyed the story.
Comment from Phoenix Rysing
This is heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time. Not sure if this is a true story, or if that even matters...but my God...I can't even imagine. The errors are there, but it would take reading it over again for anyone to even notice. The story overpowers any grammatical or punctuation errors. WELL DONE.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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This is heartbreaking and beautiful at the same time. Not sure if this is a true story, or if that even matters...but my God...I can't even imagine. The errors are there, but it would take reading it over again for anyone to even notice. The story overpowers any grammatical or punctuation errors. WELL DONE.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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Thank you. The story is not true. I need to take some grammar lessons so I can do a better job on these stories. Thank you for taking the time to read the story and the five stars.
Comment from N.K. Wagner
A well written story about faith destroyed and too late restored. The first person POV is very effectively used here. The reader immediately makes . a connection with the protagonist. :) Nancy
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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A well written story about faith destroyed and too late restored. The first person POV is very effectively used here. The reader immediately makes . a connection with the protagonist. :) Nancy
Comment Written 26-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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Thank you for the great review and the five stars. I'm so glad you liked the story. I need to take some grammar lessons so I can do a better job on these stories.
Comment from mfowler
You weren't in too big a hurry as I found your work to be free of error and very well written. The story is a tale of faith on two levels. Firstly, there's the husband who couldn't be relied on, not even to attend the birth of his child. Secondly, there is the spiritual dimension where a presence, spirit of Fred is by the mother's side when she needs him. That is subtly exposed and is at the emotional crux of the story. Your narrative structure is strong in this short story as you build from a discussion about Fred's unreliability to the climax of 'the visit', and on to the resolution where you tell hold your daughter and acknowledge Fred's honouring of his promise. Evocative, emotionally powerful, but not mawkish - an excellent entry in this particular competition. Best of luck.
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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You weren't in too big a hurry as I found your work to be free of error and very well written. The story is a tale of faith on two levels. Firstly, there's the husband who couldn't be relied on, not even to attend the birth of his child. Secondly, there is the spiritual dimension where a presence, spirit of Fred is by the mother's side when she needs him. That is subtly exposed and is at the emotional crux of the story. Your narrative structure is strong in this short story as you build from a discussion about Fred's unreliability to the climax of 'the visit', and on to the resolution where you tell hold your daughter and acknowledge Fred's honouring of his promise. Evocative, emotionally powerful, but not mawkish - an excellent entry in this particular competition. Best of luck.
Comment Written 26-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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Thank you for the five stars and the inspiring review. I edited the story three times before I could feel good about it. I intend to take some writing classes and get better with the grammar part.
Comment from alvina224224
A strong and emotional story, author, and one that brought tears to my eyes. The images are vivid, and reinvent one's vision of faith. Good luck in the contest
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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A strong and emotional story, author, and one that brought tears to my eyes. The images are vivid, and reinvent one's vision of faith. Good luck in the contest
Comment Written 26-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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Thank you for your wonderful review and the six stars. I truly appreciate them. This story is not true but I suppose something like this could happen.
Comment from RGstar
My word, I thought this was biographical until after I scrolled up o reading...as your story touched me even halfway through.
I felt every emotion when he grabbed your hand. So pleased it was fiction, but how well you filled it with emotion.
Bravo.
Good luck.
My best wishes.
RGstar
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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My word, I thought this was biographical until after I scrolled up o reading...as your story touched me even halfway through.
I felt every emotion when he grabbed your hand. So pleased it was fiction, but how well you filled it with emotion.
Bravo.
Good luck.
My best wishes.
RGstar
Comment Written 26-Mar-2016
reply by the author on 27-Mar-2016
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Thank you for the beautiful review and the five stars. It means so much to me when a reviewer encourages me. Hugs to you.
