Comment from Green Lake Girl

Excellent

So sorry for this incredibly late review. Your story intrigues me and I knew I'd eventually get to this post! I keep going back to the knowledge that this bizarre chain of events was set in motion by your Grandmother. Many lives severely impacted by her deeds.

I hope that you've been able to meet your Father. He sounds like a great guy, a bit cautious, but that's to be expected.

You do a very good job portraying the incredible array of emotions from all players in this story.

 Comment Written 24-Apr-2016

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reply by the author on 25-Apr-2016

Oh Melissa, I'm so pleased to hear from you and thanks for the great review. I will come back to the Quest soon and finish it off. I see you are back with my all favorite, Alejandro, and will hurry on to read. All the best. Ulla:)))

Comment from Curly Girly

Excellent

This took a surprising turn. It has been too much for the elderly man to digest in one go. It seems that he wishes to build a relationship before a meeting. It is understandable.
There was far too much information that nobody else could possibly have known."
There was far too much information for anyone else to have known."
Nicole

 Comment Written 03-Apr-2016

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reply by the author on 05-Apr-2016

Thank you so much., Nicole and I've made the correction. I'm so pleased you are back reviewing. All the best. Ulla

Comment from alexisleech

Exceptional

Apologies for taking so long to review this, Ulla, but it was well worth the wait! I at last had my internet satellite fitted on Friday, so I can return to writing and reviewing without fear of getting cut off -phew! The last couple of weeks have been busy and productive, with an excellent review from my first guest resulting in more bookings. I'm now in a frenzy to clean away all the woodburner grime around the house and have it sparkling before any more guests arrive. It's amazing what having something to look forward to can do for your motivation! Knowing I can use Skype again is also a huge relief, and I'm gradually getting reconnected to my friends and family without fear of going over my previous stingy data allowance.

I hope all is well with you, and I look forward to the next installment of your facinating story!

Hugs from a cold but sunny France,

Alexis xxx

Alan sat, took hold of my hand, caressing it gently, as he waited for my tears to subside.
suggest;
Alan sat, took hold of my hand, and caressed it gently as he waited for my tears to subside.

and a moment later was back handing me a glass of wine, (while) holding on to a glass of his own.

sipping our drink(s)

I smiled {throwing} as I threw Alan a mischievous look.

promise to keep her posted (about future news) no need to repeat the word 'news'

As I put down the phone(,) it dawned on me that I had a brother.
suggest
As I put down the phone, the knowledge that I had a brother filled my mind.

 Comment Written 27-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 30-Mar-2016

Hi Alexis, now I have to apology for not coming back earlier. My family has arrived from Denmark and I am so busy with my two small grandchildren. Both girls. One is four and the other one twenty months. I adore them.
Thanks also for your great review, and the stars. As you know they mean a lot to me. I have made changes.
I'm pleased that you are getting settled and that your business is going well. Very important. Also that you now have proper Internet connection. It must be such a relief. Will you find the time to write and post again? I hope so because I do miss it. If you would like I would love to skype and we could have a chat. I will send you my user name in a private message. Sorry again for being this late. Big hugs from sunny and warm Spain 25 degrees here today. Yeah, I know I'm bragging. LOL. Ulla xxx

Comment from RGstar

Excellent

SIX STARS

Loved this,Ulla.
I came to support your work as you do mine, and was not disappointed. I loved this write, and carried me through deep emotions contemplating if I should be in the same situation.

I almost did not want to stop reading.
Such an intimate part of a life.

Lovely to get to know through the write.

Have a great day

RGstar

 Comment Written 23-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 24-Mar-2016

Hello RGstar, thanks so much for the lovely review and the virtual six, and for paying me a visit. It's been a long journey this story of mine although it all happened within a few months in 2003. An amazing year it was. I am overjoyed that you like it and more is to follow. My journey to find my roots are not quite over yet. All the best. Ulla:))

Comment from Helen Bach

Exceptional

I love your story Ulla. I am hooked, and I now have another to read, that's one good thing about being ill for the last couple of weeks. You have a way of telling a story that shows such talent. Do you have any works that are published? I'm off to read the next part. Speak soon x

 Comment Written 23-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 24-Mar-2016

Hi Helen. Thank you so much and for the lovely stars. No I haven't anything published yet but would like to do so. In fact I'm quite keen. I am sorry to hear that you have been unwell. Hope you are much better now. All the best, and thanks again for your great support. Ulla xx

Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)

Excellent

This is another good chapter of your story which is fascinating to read. To have found your mother, spoken with your father and finding out you have a brother and on top of it all, moving to Spain. I look forward to reading more, my friend~Debbie

 Comment Written 23-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 24-Mar-2016

Hi Debbie, thanks a lot for this great review. Yes 2003 was an amazing year and quite beyond belief. Everything just happened. And within a few months. All the best. Ulla:)))

Comment from Jonesy

Excellent

Coming in this late it's impossible to comment on the overall story, so isolating it to the readability of just this chapter is the proper way to review.

And nothing to say here - I can't think of anything that might aid the author. SPAG, structure, flow, all seem top notch.

 Comment Written 23-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 24-Mar-2016

Thanks a lot for this great review. There are a few more chapters to come. I'm glad you are reading my work. All the best. Ulla:)

Comment from Writingfundimension

Excellent

Hi, Ulla

It appears, from this chapter, that your birth father, Reuben, was/is a gracious man not given to impulse. Then to find out you have a 'new' sibling, must have been astounding. Looking forward to learning more about this branch of your family.

Well done.

:) Bev

 Comment Written 22-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 24-Mar-2016

Hi Bev, yes it was amazing to realise that I have a brother. Thanks for your great review. All the best. Ulla:)))

Comment from THATSNOMOON1

Excellent

Great story! It's really interesting reading about people's lives in the past, though relatively speaking your story didn't take place that long ago, it still was well before I was born and times today are certainly different. Thanks for sharing! This definitely seems like publishing material/something you could write a book on. Reading this story, it makes sense why you want to write a novel!

 Comment Written 22-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 24-Mar-2016

Thank you so much. I hope you don't mind me asking, but when were you born? This bio of mine takes place in 2003 and if you were not yet born, that makes you twelve years of age at the most.?? Thanks for a very well articulated review if you are that young. LOL. All the best. Ulla:)))

reply by THATSNOMOON1 on 27-Mar-2016

Oh, I was born in the mid 1990's so I was around in 2003 haha. Sorry for the confusion, I meant the parts at the beginning of the story where you described your youth and parents.

Comment from S.M.E.Schultz

Good

This made me teary. I have searched from my father's half-sister for years and can't seem to track her down. I used to work in a government office and my job was to locate birth parents for adult adoptees, so I am familiar with range of emotions this brings out! This writing is very gentle, emotional and low key. It tells as much about the characters as the situation. I hope you have a happy ending!

This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.

 Comment Written 22-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 22-Mar-2016

Thanks. Please tell me what mistakes I made to give me four when you liked it so much. Ulla

reply by S.M.E.Schultz on 22-Mar-2016

Only small things like missing commas but more importantly, during this section I got the sense from the dialogue and the that you were skipping over information or holding back...like you were in a hurry to get past this initial contact and not talk about it. Maybe that is not what you intended but I missed the intimacy of your narratives in the the first parts.