Comment from Mabaker

Good

Prettybluebirds, you have reviewed me and said great things, now I'm going to break your heart. I love cats, I love cat stories, but dear girl please use your synonym. I counted in the brief story six 'little's' as little guy, little creature, little guy, little kitten. Now here are some alternatives to little. small, diminutive, slight, weak. Also kitten way overused. Now Prettybluebirds I tell you this as your friend. I couldn't write a story without checking my synonyms. Please do, as you are such a good writer Regards Anne Mabaker.

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 Comment Written 12-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Mar-2016

Thank you. I appreciate good, honest reviews. I will edit and replace some of those words. You are right, I have caught myself over-using words before. It is a habit I am trying to break.

reply by Mabaker on 12-Mar-2016

I am so happy I didn't lose a good friend. I used to overuse as well, I think we get into a 'zone' and forget to look. Regards Anne.

Comment from jmdg1954

Excellent

A nice heartwarming story. I like how it was told in that POV.

As I'm reading this, I continually waited for the hammer to fall. Waited for the gruesome end to the kitten. I'm glad it didn't come to that.
Nicely done. John

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Mar-2016

Thank you. This is a true story. My brother was a mailman for many years and tried to catch any lost cat or dog he found dumped along the roads.

Comment from johngie

Exceptional

Thanks for sharing this story Aunt Ruth. I don't remember Dad telling that one. I can hear Dad speaking in your story. (wiping tears, again) I can also hear you in your story. Very well done Auntie. I wish you the best in the contest. Miss you lots. Love and hugs.

 Comment Written 12-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Mar-2016

Thank you, Angie. I remember your dad telling me this story. The only thing I made up was the girl's name. He never said who she was, but he did give her the kitten. What amused your dad was the kitten running up his arm and into the mailboxes.

Comment from mfowler

Excellent

I really enjoyed your tale of the feline Good Samaritan. The excellent descriptive section which complemented the contest image, led the reader into the story very well. The mischievous kitten is charming and the little gir's entrance into the story made for a charming conclusion. The one thing that distracts in this piece is the chop and change in verbal tense which begins in the paragraph 'I continued down the road'. Present switches to past again in a few places. You still have time to fix it. Good luck with the contest.

 Comment Written 11-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Mar-2016

Thank you. I was trying to watch that so I will edit and double check. Thanks for the advice.

Comment from Dawn Munro

Excellent

Awwwwwwwwwwwwww! Does that tell you what I think of your story? It is so sweet and it's well-written, easy to get lost in it. I was done before I knew it. :) Your author's notes have me ticked off though - how can people do such a thing intentionally? Great narrative, believable characters, good description.

 Comment Written 11-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Mar-2016

Thank you. Dumping animals happens all the time. I have seven cats and they were all dumped along different. roads.

reply by Dawn Munro on 12-Mar-2016

I know it does - such a shame! Good for you for taking in the strays! Blessings.

Comment from DonandVicki

Excellent

A very touching and moving story about the plight of lost and abandoned animals, your story moves very well and captures the heart. I only have a small suggestion and that is check your title for the spelling of Kitten, I think you mistakenly caped the i.

 Comment Written 11-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Mar-2016

Thank you. Yep, you are right. I will edit and correct.

Comment from LishaG

Excellent

Thanks for the sweet story and the happy ending. I'm glad that the protagonist notes the cruelty of the kitten's previous owner, but doesn't dwell on it. I also enjoyed reading your author's notes. This helped me understand your story's inspiration. It's great to know that there are kind heroic people in this world.

 Comment Written 11-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Mar-2016

Thank you. This is a true story. My brother often found lost animals on his mail route. He would always try to catch them and find homes for them.

Comment from Annette Gulliver

Excellent

A lovely feel good story. Your brother has a kind heart, and the little kitten that he found is very fortunate. Not only did he save the kitten's life, he brought happiness to a little girl.
I can relate to this. I was always finding stray kittens as a child, and one who was ready to give birth. My dad was not impressed, but my mum let me keep at least 2 of the kittens.
Very well written, and easy to follow.
Good luck, Annette

 Comment Written 11-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Mar-2016

Thank you. I'm glad to see you have a kind heart too.

Comment from RPSaxena

Exceptional

Hello Pretty Blue Birds,
Lovely piece of General Non-Fiction beautifully depicting its theme!
Wording is simple as well as impressive and perfectly matching with the theme.
Smooth and captivating flow from the beginning to the end with lively imagery.
These lines are particularly noteworthy:
"So, I have no choice other than to stop and pick the poor little kitten up. I don't need any more cats, but I won't leave the little creature here to die."
&
"Oh well, I'm so glad things turned out as they did. The kitten has a wonderful home instead of dying a terrible death out there in the woods."
Best of Luck!

 Comment Written 11-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Mar-2016

Thank you. Thanks for the six stars, I appreciate them. My brother had a kind heart and it made him so angry when folks dumped animals.

Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)

Excellent

When the kitten wakes up he stretches ( comma after up)

When I stopped at the next mailbox the kitten ran up (comma after mailbox)

I stick my hand out the window( stuck--to keep tense consistent)

I love a happy ending. I have taken in many homeless kittens over the years. They have all passed away now, and I have a beagle, my baby, who would be insanely jealous if I had another pet. I hope somewhere there are good people taking my place in helping these poor little angels. Thank you for sharing this, my friend~Debbie

 Comment Written 11-Mar-2016

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reply by the author on 12-Mar-2016

Thank you. Thanks for the tips too. I need to take some grammar lessons.