Reviews from

The Piper

Viewing comments for Chapter 5 "The Piper, part 5"
Young Adult Fantasy

16 total reviews 
Comment from karenina
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

Beneath your gifted pen, the scene is set in such a way that I feel the anticipation rising in the audience, smell the candles, hear the troubadours setting up...and then...

Oh no, Not the Fae again! And this time he seems so clandestine and somewhat eerie.

I fear all is not well in the story ahead.

I'm going to beware of blue-tinged creatures henceforth!

Karenina




 Comment Written 19-Feb-2023


reply by the author on 20-Feb-2023
    You are so generous with your praise. Thank you for letting me know your reactions to the scene and the characters.
    Debi
reply by karenina on 20-Feb-2023
    That's what we do, right? Share?
Comment from May 1
Excellent
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I love the fact that you describe the smells so well that I can imagine them clearly. It's not as common for me to see those kinds of descriptions. Maybe I am being cruel but I am suspicious of Braun, I find it his request odd. It's interesting to see how cautious the Fae are, or at least I am thinking that's the same Fae from before. Quite an intriguing chapter.

 Comment Written 26-Jan-2020


reply by the author on 26-Jan-2020
    Thank you for the comments, especially about being able to imagine the smells. I appreciate your analysis of the characters. Yes, it is the same Fae.
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Excellent
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Hi, Debi

= Nice to see you pop up!
= This is a good, solid chapter.
= Excellent dialogue throughout.
= Nice end hook ... a mysterious stranger.

*** I apologize for my late response ***
= Just edited/published a new book of SHORT STORIES.
= Highlighted w/plugin to = amazon.com = on my profile page.
= Working on getting caught up on reviews/reviewing.

* Cheers & Blessings *
Keep Smilin'... Jackie <> Jax (*<*)

 Comment Written 16-Feb-2016


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2016
    Thank you for the encouraging review, Jax.

    How exciting about your newly published book of short stories. Congratulations! I'll be dropping in soon to check it out.

    Debi
Comment from Spitfire
Excellent
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I see where the fantasy part comes in, but the references to a guild and troubadours and stories to share makes me think of Old English literature, particular Beowulf. Your details bring the reader right into the festivities. Wonderful and frightening hook at the end.

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2016


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2016
    Thank you for sticking with the story, Shari. I appreciate your insights and the encouragement.
Comment from Writingfundimension
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

Hi, Debi

It's fascinating for me to see how this story is taking on its own life. It's depth and quality is quite remarkable, too. I love that Piper, and many of the characters, seem to be decent folk. You weave backstory into this chapter so well, too. We know now that Piper has an impressive lineage and background, making him not just another fledgling musician.

Great to see this wonderful chapter, my friend.

:) Bev

 Comment Written 15-Feb-2016


reply by the author on 17-Feb-2016
    Hi Bev,

    Thank you for the generous six stars! Also, for the comments about the story and the characters. Thanks for mentioning the backstory. That was a fun class. There haven't been too many classes offered lately. I have learned a lot in the classes taught on FS so I hope they continue.
    I appreciate your continued support. Thank you much!
    Debi
reply by Writingfundimension on 17-Feb-2016
    You're very welcome, Debi. You're doing a great job with this novel.

    :) Bev
Comment from Pam (respa)
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

-It's so good to see you back with another chapter about Piper.
-This chapter continues the mystery that encircles Piper.
-He always seems to begin in a very innocent like setting, and then the reader gets suspicious. You do that very well.
-Piper and his friend Rupert are excited to see a former troubadour named Braun.
-As with many concerts of today, even, there is waiting while everything is getting set, and musicians assemble.
-My suspicion creeps in as Braun needs Piper to get a lute from the guild, as guild members are not around, and he has broken a string.
-I am thinking things like is he telling the truth; is Piper going to get accused of stealing, or worse, because the Fae is always lurking around.
-Sure enough, he begins to follow Piper.
-Now the reader has to wait to see what else the Fae has in store; there is a sneaking feeling that it won't be good.





 Comment Written 14-Feb-2016


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2016
    What a fun review. Thank you for pointing out the parts you like. I appreciate the dedicated way you have followed the story and encouraged me. I am hoping to post and review more often now that work is slowing down. Thank you again for the delightful comments.
reply by Pam (respa) on 15-Feb-2016
    You are very welcome for the review. I really enjoy this story. You give just enough to keep interest, but get that small bit of question in there. You must have quite a demanding job, or is it a seasonal kind of thing? I am glad you will be able to do more on FS.
reply by the author on 16-Feb-2016
    It is seasonal, at least I hope so!
reply by Pam (respa) on 17-Feb-2016
    Thanks for the info.
Comment from rspoet
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

The return of the Piper
He has been gone far too long
He was missed
But now here he is with his friend and sidekick Rupert
and with Troubadour Braun
In the shadows lurks the fae
whose business with Piper
brings him to the castle
to the grand hall
He darts between the revealing moonbeams
for the meeting now eminent
And we wait... for fate is intervening
and history will soon be clear
Very fine chapter to the tale of Piper

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2016


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2016
    Thank you for the generous six stars and the enthusiastic review. I am sorry for the delay in posting. Work should be slowing down and all the overtime going away which will allow me to get to Piper more often. I appreciate you following the story with such dedication. It is very encouraging.
Comment from nancy_e_davis
Excellent
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I'm afraid the Fae is going to steal him away and if that happens the Troubadour Braun won't get what he needs for the
performance. He will lose favor with a valuable friend. Well done WJ. xsx Nancy

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2016


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2016
    Hi Nancy. Thank you for stopping in to read about Piper. I appreciate your analysis and the encouragement.
Comment from foxangie123
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

This is enjoyable for both the young adult and the old. I won't tell you which one I am okay but it begins with an oh..... Great, enjoyable writing...

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2016


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2016
    Thank you for the delightful review. I'm pleased that you enjoyed reading the story.
Comment from F. Wehr3
Excellent
Not yet exceptional. When the exceptional rating is reached this is highlighted

I remembered reading parts of this story, and I am glad you are continuing. You have some really good moments with visual imagery. I am enjoying Piper and the Fae.

' "I can't wait until we are journeyman troubadours and we can see all those far away places for ourselves."' Just need a comma before and.

Take care,
Russell

 Comment Written 14-Feb-2016


reply by the author on 14-Feb-2016
    Hi Russell. Thank your for the encouragement about the story and for pointing out the correct punctuation. I am pleased you enjoy the visual imagery, and Piper and the Fae.