The Wonder
Viewing comments for Chapter 8 "Somber Affair"miscellaneous poems
11 total reviews
Comment from Ricky1024
"$$@@!!Slipknot"!!$$@@
By Ricky1024
"Slipknot noosr around my neck!"
"Now p,ull it tight!"
"Necktie feels alright...
...
"Now stand back...
"And cover eyes...
"Never watch for I may not die...
"Don't stare, pull lever but now beware....
....
"Beware of trap door!"
"Release is down...
"And down the drain I must say...
"Perhaps it would have been better with heroin stuck in my vein?"
...
"Forget my name as neck cracks...
"Ain't no coming back...
"Dangling corpse...
"Body to mind now divorced...
...
"Everyone now looks and laughs for this is my life....
"Lost the only Son...
"Then the wife...
"This is my loss and this is for me...
....
"No more shall I then go through this pain...
"I have some perpous now....
"I feel but feel knot....
"For me Michael but do not fear....
....
"Walk with me but not close to me ....
"My dear touch my grave stone and cry not for if I was never here...
"I was never gone....
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2016
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"$$@@!!Slipknot"!!$$@@
By Ricky1024
"Slipknot noosr around my neck!"
"Now p,ull it tight!"
"Necktie feels alright...
...
"Now stand back...
"And cover eyes...
"Never watch for I may not die...
"Don't stare, pull lever but now beware....
....
"Beware of trap door!"
"Release is down...
"And down the drain I must say...
"Perhaps it would have been better with heroin stuck in my vein?"
...
"Forget my name as neck cracks...
"Ain't no coming back...
"Dangling corpse...
"Body to mind now divorced...
...
"Everyone now looks and laughs for this is my life....
"Lost the only Son...
"Then the wife...
"This is my loss and this is for me...
....
"No more shall I then go through this pain...
"I have some perpous now....
"I feel but feel knot....
"For me Michael but do not fear....
....
"Walk with me but not close to me ....
"My dear touch my grave stone and cry not for if I was never here...
"I was never gone....
Comment Written 29-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 29-Jan-2016
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Hey Rick....-smile-
I know man..........what its like to have a hole you cant fill.
to retrace every moment , dissect every second, convinced if I could just recognize it...I could understand it....and overcome it....but I dont think I ever will understand....not sure any explanation would be good enough anyway. I dont have an answer....not yet anyway. I'm sorry about that....find someone who needs you rick....help someone....you be the world you want to live in....love Michael
Comment from snooker155
very good shows the drudgery and the traps the addiction to gambling can bring. Accompanying music perfect how a gambler makes empty promises only to let even those closest to him down hence the words full of broken thorns I cannot repair from snooker155x
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2016
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very good shows the drudgery and the traps the addiction to gambling can bring. Accompanying music perfect how a gambler makes empty promises only to let even those closest to him down hence the words full of broken thorns I cannot repair from snooker155x
Comment Written 26-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 26-Jan-2016
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Hey Snook...-smile- how are ya man...? ya know, when I write most of the time...when I write for me anyway...I just find a sound , song, video....that moves me in some way....and then I just start writing in that moment while its playing. I'm not saying this is only way to...or I do...communicate. Its just what I've grown into ...it relaxes me sometimes....comforts I guess in a way.
I'm listening to it now....this is me in the here and now. or more precise where I was in that moments capture. Its about saying goodbye and believing in seeing again. Its about being so disappointed um, not being able to understand the why's of how...lost I guess uh in the same place for what seems like forever. Its about treating yourself like you feel you've been treated. Its a mess dude...its life. -smile- thank you Bud for stopping by...I noticed I'm still muted. love Michael
Comment from amada
I'm intrigued by this "eclipsed life I blinked see the sunrise while yours sets
horizon over.." It sound a little disastrous to me. Hope you are all right, my friend.
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2016
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I'm intrigued by this "eclipsed life I blinked see the sunrise while yours sets
horizon over.." It sound a little disastrous to me. Hope you are all right, my friend.
Comment Written 25-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2016
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yea....just had good dream. -smile-...thank you Nancy, but dont worry I'm gonna live forever...-smile- love you Michael
Comment from Liberty Justice
Poet transends in hundreds of thouhmghts as his outcries and strong convictions race down the
page. Must be the eclipse of moon causing drastic reactions in author. liberty justice
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2016
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Poet transends in hundreds of thouhmghts as his outcries and strong convictions race down the
page. Must be the eclipse of moon causing drastic reactions in author. liberty justice
Comment Written 25-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 25-Jan-2016
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Amen...full moon and memories make a wolfman...-wink- Appreciate ya man. love Michael
-
correction: thoughts. My keyboard keeps
typing its own words.
Comment from NicciFaye
Crucifixion becomes its own crystal cathedral...such a powerful image of metaphoric essence. This one felt different Michael....almost close to home personal...the...I hurt myself again today seem to cut me every time I read it...I felt it.
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2016
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Crucifixion becomes its own crystal cathedral...such a powerful image of metaphoric essence. This one felt different Michael....almost close to home personal...the...I hurt myself again today seem to cut me every time I read it...I felt it.
Comment Written 24-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2016
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yea...-smile- i'm sure it is....it came out of me.
you ever want something so bad the want turns to need ....just to breathe. you know deep like you used to...I'm getting old Nicci and running out of time....-smile- love you Michael
-
Everyone is getting old Michael...some quicker than others, but that is just the physical. The mental and spiritual will always be as young as we nourish it. Where are you not being nourished? What is missing? I do pray, because you are in my prayers and on my prayer list that ...you desires are met before...we meet Jesus..
-
He knows the desire of my heart...very well. -smile-....thank you Nicci for praying for me...I swear to God it means everything to me. love you-
Comment from Ronni
Pain and faith have one perpetual irony, neither one is as visible as it is deep,
nor as inconsequential to even loves penitent and pleading release. This
so grippingly vibrates in your 4th and last phrases; a repetitive pain.
Exceptional presentation, love your lead in with the lunar eclipse .sets
the heightened tone and transcendence with great pic .Thanks for
sharing. Always you create another world experience in your writes..
this is one of your best indeed. Awesome by nature as many know.
Very best wishes always, Ronni
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2016
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Pain and faith have one perpetual irony, neither one is as visible as it is deep,
nor as inconsequential to even loves penitent and pleading release. This
so grippingly vibrates in your 4th and last phrases; a repetitive pain.
Exceptional presentation, love your lead in with the lunar eclipse .sets
the heightened tone and transcendence with great pic .Thanks for
sharing. Always you create another world experience in your writes..
this is one of your best indeed. Awesome by nature as many know.
Very best wishes always, Ronni
Comment Written 24-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2016
-
-smile-...thank you- I've missed you. It hurt me to read that-
yes maam....pain comes with birth, from my experience anyway...-smile- ah but then there are moments filled with so much joy we hold out hope for more...just one more. love Michael
-
Yes, there is always 'at least one more'
and all the more deserved. Especially
by you. Amen! Always, Ronni
-
Yes, there is always 'at least one more'
and all the more deserved. Especially
by you. Amen! Always, Ronni
Comment from I am Cat
Hello Handsome... how are you? did you REALLY hurt yourself? I hope not.
Don't be falling off things... ok? :(
This is really amazing, this poem. I love the wording in it. It's quite different from your last, which I haven't reviewed yet, but have read. ;)
I had my daughter here this weekend and didn't review much.
I really love this part:
'I've pleaded with an auditorium of stars
mercy free me from this apostleship
cup a joe in trade for truth
my church burnt to ashes
nothing left worth worship
crucifixion becomes its own crystal cathedral '
wonderfully stated..
in short, I really liked this easy style... very easy to follow... gave me a great feeling.
WEll done,
cat
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2016
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Hello Handsome... how are you? did you REALLY hurt yourself? I hope not.
Don't be falling off things... ok? :(
This is really amazing, this poem. I love the wording in it. It's quite different from your last, which I haven't reviewed yet, but have read. ;)
I had my daughter here this weekend and didn't review much.
I really love this part:
'I've pleaded with an auditorium of stars
mercy free me from this apostleship
cup a joe in trade for truth
my church burnt to ashes
nothing left worth worship
crucifixion becomes its own crystal cathedral '
wonderfully stated..
in short, I really liked this easy style... very easy to follow... gave me a great feeling.
WEll done,
cat
Comment Written 24-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2016
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Hello Sexy...-smile- ...i'm alright...could be better but couldn't we all. haha...yea, I've hurt myself, doesn't everybody...-headtilt-...-smile- ...choices kitten come and go...and ah ya never know. ya just have trust...-smile-....and sometimes that costs more than you were aware it would. so is it worth it...-headshake- yea...because God....and what cant....He can....and so hope still has a heartbeat love Michael
-
Are you alright? (((((((sending gentle hugs))))))))
Comment from IndianaIrish
A powerful poem, Michael. Reads as if inspired by the song...one of my favorites. Written by Trent of Nine Inch Nails. But my favorite version is the one by Johnny Cash. Emotional heart-grabbing words...ya did good!
Smiles,
Karyn :-)
"Everyone I know
goes away n the end."
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2016
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A powerful poem, Michael. Reads as if inspired by the song...one of my favorites. Written by Trent of Nine Inch Nails. But my favorite version is the one by Johnny Cash. Emotional heart-grabbing words...ya did good!
Smiles,
Karyn :-)
"Everyone I know
goes away n the end."
Comment Written 24-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2016
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Hey Beautiful...-smile-...yea I watched the cash one...I think Jaq used it once upon a time...something about this one that just kept me I guess. yea....seems like it dont it....love you michael
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
You're hurting, Michael. It's times like these that we question our faith, just for a while, it doesn't last. When someone you love hurts, you hurt, it's the human in us. We will all get the answers one day, the 'why?' it won't be answered down here, trust me, I've asked the question dozens of times. I still don't know why. Just keep her in your prayers, that's all any of us can do...and have faith. Love you, my sweet friend. xxx Sandy.
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reply by the author on 24-Jan-2016
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You're hurting, Michael. It's times like these that we question our faith, just for a while, it doesn't last. When someone you love hurts, you hurt, it's the human in us. We will all get the answers one day, the 'why?' it won't be answered down here, trust me, I've asked the question dozens of times. I still don't know why. Just keep her in your prayers, that's all any of us can do...and have faith. Love you, my sweet friend. xxx Sandy.
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Comment Written 24-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2016
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Hi Sandy...-smile- thanks. ah just helpless to will my way with some things I guess. I know...because I've been there. to want saving grace that stays just out of reach. I cant fix the way things are by myself. love you too Michael
Comment from LIJ Red
So, I make the first comment. This time you are easier to understand. Or misunderstand. You are a weary peace-corps worker in northern Iraq,
having a crisis of faith. Or some metaphorical parallel. Good clip of a lunar
eclipse. Good images in the lines.
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reply by the author on 24-Jan-2016
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So, I make the first comment. This time you are easier to understand. Or misunderstand. You are a weary peace-corps worker in northern Iraq,
having a crisis of faith. Or some metaphorical parallel. Good clip of a lunar
eclipse. Good images in the lines.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 24-Jan-2016
reply by the author on 24-Jan-2016
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-smile-...no not Northern Iraq...in Country. I'm not sure...as usual....I just wrote it listening to the song. I think it probably has to do with the ah human who has tasted Divine um and ah ....spends a lifetime living a faith unseen. Its not always easy to remain firm in its sureity. But...someday I'll know...-wink- thanks man. love Michael
