Dark Covenant
Viewing comments for Chapter 25 "Demon At Large"The Berwick Witches Series: Book One
22 total reviews
Comment from chasennov
Chapter 25 of the book Dark Covenant The Berwick Witches Series: Book 1 "Demon At Large" What another excellent chapter you have delivered here. I enjoyed the formulation and I thought the narrative was pretty good too. Very well done.
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2015
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Chapter 25 of the book Dark Covenant The Berwick Witches Series: Book 1 "Demon At Large" What another excellent chapter you have delivered here. I enjoyed the formulation and I thought the narrative was pretty good too. Very well done.
Comment Written 16-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2015
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Thank you chasennov.
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You are most welcome.
Comment from Mastery
Hi, Harriett. Splendid job here from start to finish. It has been a long time between posts but you sure haven't missed a beat.
Great dialogue:
"Oh."
"I have a jacket in the car. You want to go and get it?" She fingered in her handbag for her car keys.
"No. I'm good."
Also, concrete images throughout:like:
"The manager took the phone. "Hello?" he said, looking annoyed. Seconds into listening, his whole expression changed; his eyes grew wide and fixed. Holding the phone at his ear, he turned and slowly, walked over to a wall, pulled from it the master key--turned and walked back and faced Ward. "Seven twenty-three," the manager said like a bad recording and handed Ward the key."
Merry Christmas! Bob
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2015
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Hi, Harriett. Splendid job here from start to finish. It has been a long time between posts but you sure haven't missed a beat.
Great dialogue:
"Oh."
"I have a jacket in the car. You want to go and get it?" She fingered in her handbag for her car keys.
"No. I'm good."
Also, concrete images throughout:like:
"The manager took the phone. "Hello?" he said, looking annoyed. Seconds into listening, his whole expression changed; his eyes grew wide and fixed. Holding the phone at his ear, he turned and slowly, walked over to a wall, pulled from it the master key--turned and walked back and faced Ward. "Seven twenty-three," the manager said like a bad recording and handed Ward the key."
Merry Christmas! Bob
Comment Written 16-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2015
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Thank you, Bob. I'm glad you liked this chapter. And thanks for my first six star since coming back. :). You won't believe what I've got on my plate. I'm working with a narrator for my Glass Cat Eye Book. My editor did a fantastic job on The Animal Doctor, I'm really pleased. Your second book and mine looks like it's going to come out around the same time. I'm pushing for January for The Animal Doctor. When does your second book come out?
Oh, and Merry Christmas, Bob.
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Probably early 2017 (lots ofpromo etc before release. Bob
Comment from trumby
It comes across to me as more like a family squabble, mate. Jewel does seem to have some awesome abilities though.
I like the bit where Ward is in the apartment, and sees his reflection in the mirror. I can imagine how he jumped as the same thing has happened to me. However, I was cleaning up a murder scene at the time. I do contract cleaning of crime scenes. (Much to my wife's disgust) Murders, drug labs, rapes
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2015
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It comes across to me as more like a family squabble, mate. Jewel does seem to have some awesome abilities though.
I like the bit where Ward is in the apartment, and sees his reflection in the mirror. I can imagine how he jumped as the same thing has happened to me. However, I was cleaning up a murder scene at the time. I do contract cleaning of crime scenes. (Much to my wife's disgust) Murders, drug labs, rapes
Comment Written 16-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 17-Dec-2015
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Oh, wow, My God. I can you stomach such a profession. Well, I guess somebody has to do it. Have you written any stories about your profession? I bet it'll be awesome ready. And this is just the site to present such stories. Anyway, thank you for you interview. I'm glad you liked it.
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I think that I might have to write something about my jobs. do you think
Comment from F. Wehr3
Really nice work! I enjoyed this piece. Take a look at this sentence, it contains three 'thats'.
'Nancy whimpered on the phone and told Ward that Karl was still unconscious and that the experts sounded to her that they were giving up on Karl.'
I looking forward to reading more of your work, very engaging. All the best.
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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Really nice work! I enjoyed this piece. Take a look at this sentence, it contains three 'thats'.
'Nancy whimpered on the phone and told Ward that Karl was still unconscious and that the experts sounded to her that they were giving up on Karl.'
I looking forward to reading more of your work, very engaging. All the best.
Comment Written 16-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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I'll take a look at it. Thank you.
Comment from Neonewman
Damn, there is a lot going on in this chapter my dear! Karl, Jesse, ward etc. I love it. Very well crafted piece you have delivered with just enough temptation lol.
God bless!
Steve
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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Damn, there is a lot going on in this chapter my dear! Karl, Jesse, ward etc. I love it. Very well crafted piece you have delivered with just enough temptation lol.
God bless!
Steve
Comment Written 16-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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Thank you very much.
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My pleasure!
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My pleasure!
Comment from pbroussard209
Great chapter, I loved every part of this scene, it moved nicely and kept me engaged, and wanting to read more. You added just the right amount of humor and mystery and that part in the bedroom where he thought he heard something made me curious and a little nervous. Awesome.
that function better in a lower temperature than most people aren't(are) used to.
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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Great chapter, I loved every part of this scene, it moved nicely and kept me engaged, and wanting to read more. You added just the right amount of humor and mystery and that part in the bedroom where he thought he heard something made me curious and a little nervous. Awesome.
that function better in a lower temperature than most people aren't(are) used to.
Comment Written 16-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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Thank you very much. I'm glad you liked it.
Comment from Shirley McLain
I'm enjoying the story very much. It's interesting and active which keeps me reading. You did an excellent job and I didn't see any problems. Have a blessed day. Shirley
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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I'm enjoying the story very much. It's interesting and active which keeps me reading. You did an excellent job and I didn't see any problems. Have a blessed day. Shirley
Comment Written 16-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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Thank you, Shirley.
Comment from CEO2020
Very Good story and prose in my opinion. Ex. -
"Then he made his way to the bedroom. He walked past the bed and gasped loudly when he saw his own reflection in the mirror. He quickly recovered, holding his stomach and continued walking to a chest of drawers and picked up a hair brush; he also bent down and grabbed up a sneaker and the T-shirt lying next to it. He put the brush inside the sneaker and wrapped the sneaker in the T-shirt then stuffed it into his jacket pocket. An unfamiliar noise startled him. Ward high tailed it out of the apartment, down the hall and pushed the button on the elevator."
Happy Holidays!
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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Very Good story and prose in my opinion. Ex. -
"Then he made his way to the bedroom. He walked past the bed and gasped loudly when he saw his own reflection in the mirror. He quickly recovered, holding his stomach and continued walking to a chest of drawers and picked up a hair brush; he also bent down and grabbed up a sneaker and the T-shirt lying next to it. He put the brush inside the sneaker and wrapped the sneaker in the T-shirt then stuffed it into his jacket pocket. An unfamiliar noise startled him. Ward high tailed it out of the apartment, down the hall and pushed the button on the elevator."
Happy Holidays!
Comment Written 16-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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Thank you.
Comment from c_lucas
FEAR will always be man's greatest enemy. Roosevelt said it best; "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a good read.
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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FEAR will always be man's greatest enemy. Roosevelt said it best; "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself." This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a good read.
Comment Written 16-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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Thank you, Charlie.
Comment from royowen
I haven't been following this for awhile Amahra, so here goes, ward manages to get into the apartment of Karl, even though the police say everybody is forbidden by the police, although he is stopped by the manager, when he hands the phone to the manager, Jewel speaks to manager who hands the keys over to Ward. When he leaves the guard scratches his head wondering how he got in? Clever old Jewel, well done, Amahra, getting back into it, blessings, Roy
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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I haven't been following this for awhile Amahra, so here goes, ward manages to get into the apartment of Karl, even though the police say everybody is forbidden by the police, although he is stopped by the manager, when he hands the phone to the manager, Jewel speaks to manager who hands the keys over to Ward. When he leaves the guard scratches his head wondering how he got in? Clever old Jewel, well done, Amahra, getting back into it, blessings, Roy
Comment Written 16-Dec-2015
reply by the author on 16-Dec-2015
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Don't forget Jewel is a witch; she did more than just speak to the manager. Thank you for getting back into it, Roy. Really appreciate it.
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Yes I knew she was a witch, and has great powers, blessings, Roy
