When Blood Collides
Viewing comments for Chapter 68 "Sisters Out of Sync, Part 2"A family's love is tested.
23 total reviews
Comment from CobiDawn
Your life has so many similar parallels to mine.
I'm so sorry for what you have endured. It is never easy to accept that sometimes the ones we love the most will never love us the same way back. It is even this way between my mom & I've always tried so hard despite what she's done. I finally had to let go because it was eating away at me.
But take comfort in knowing you're not alone. Also family doesn't have to be blood.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Your life has so many similar parallels to mine.
I'm so sorry for what you have endured. It is never easy to accept that sometimes the ones we love the most will never love us the same way back. It is even this way between my mom & I've always tried so hard despite what she's done. I finally had to let go because it was eating away at me.
But take comfort in knowing you're not alone. Also family doesn't have to be blood.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Thanks for the exceptional review, Cobi, and for sharing your personal story. My sister considered her friends to be her family and requested I not go to the funeral. (I wouldn't have anyway. The bond was broken.)
Comment from judiverse
You certainly do a great job of presenting Barbara's character, with her strong points and flaws. It seems strange that some with her looks and intelligence would be constantly in search of a new man. She certainly had a competitive streak, too, as she showed by her desire to get married before you. I think I can understand when you ask, "How can you mourn someone you don't know any more?" She didn't seem one to spend much time with her family. judi
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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You certainly do a great job of presenting Barbara's character, with her strong points and flaws. It seems strange that some with her looks and intelligence would be constantly in search of a new man. She certainly had a competitive streak, too, as she showed by her desire to get married before you. I think I can understand when you ask, "How can you mourn someone you don't know any more?" She didn't seem one to spend much time with her family. judi
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Barb held a grudge against my mother because of something that happened when she was just learning to walk. That will come out later -chapter 70, I'm thinking.
As for a new man, she was hard to please. She wanted someone like my father who was very romantic toward Mother.
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Wow! Your sister really could carry a grudge. Don't think I could remember that far back. judi
Comment from robyn corum
1.) She crossed her arms across her chest. Don't cross me in body language.
--> I think the 'across her chest' is implied
--> two (or three) 'crosses' close together.
2.) Unfortunately, when Barb called with break-up problems, I tried to help her see both (points of view).
3.) Anne wanted (our?) mother to head for South Dakota and stay at
4.) Barb was thrilled that I chose to care for her(remove space) and said(,) "Thank you so much for doing that. You can have my share of the inheritance." (D-.)
What a sad portion of your story, Shari! I think I can forgive a few loose typos when you're writing about something like this! Sending hugs--
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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1.) She crossed her arms across her chest. Don't cross me in body language.
--> I think the 'across her chest' is implied
--> two (or three) 'crosses' close together.
2.) Unfortunately, when Barb called with break-up problems, I tried to help her see both (points of view).
3.) Anne wanted (our?) mother to head for South Dakota and stay at
4.) Barb was thrilled that I chose to care for her(remove space) and said(,) "Thank you so much for doing that. You can have my share of the inheritance." (D-.)
What a sad portion of your story, Shari! I think I can forgive a few loose typos when you're writing about something like this! Sending hugs--
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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LOL. The second I spotted the list of corrections, I know it was you, Robyn. Can't believe I repeated "crosses" three times! I'm whipping myself with a wet noodle. :-)
I fixed everything and thank you profoundly.
I still want to know if you going to finish the story of the Benders. I miss it!
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Thanks, Shari! *smile* Glad you never take offense!
I AM planning to finish the story, but I got hung up on one chapter and it's giving me fits! Once I get it figured out, I can continue. Thanks for asking!
Comment from Louise Michelle
What on earth is a lantern jaw, LOL.
It's nice that you wanted to spare your mother, but Barb definitely wasn't receptive to seeing things objectively.
My sister is notorious for wasting money too.
Oh, wow, I can't wait to read about her final goodbyes.
This is another good chapter, Shari. Hugs, Lou
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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What on earth is a lantern jaw, LOL.
It's nice that you wanted to spare your mother, but Barb definitely wasn't receptive to seeing things objectively.
My sister is notorious for wasting money too.
Oh, wow, I can't wait to read about her final goodbyes.
This is another good chapter, Shari. Hugs, Lou
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Lantern jaw-. a distinctly protruding, often wide lower jaw. (I might add here that John was voted the ugliest man in his class--a joke, I suppose. But he was far from handsome.)
Wasting money is right. Barb thought nothing of buying a belt that cost fifty dollars and that was at least twenty-five years ago. Imagine the price now.
I can't wait to write the next chapter, but will wait until Sunday to post and hopefully get some sixes. I have four on this so far.
Comment from Eigle Rull
This seemed like an emotional roller coaster. I can only imagine the many feeling you went through. I enjoyed reading this chapter. It is interesting to me to be able to read true stories and events. A person gets to feel the same emotions as the writer. This definitely held my attention very well. Thank you for sharing it, my good friend. Best wishes to you and yours and have a wonderful Christmas.
Always with respect,
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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This seemed like an emotional roller coaster. I can only imagine the many feeling you went through. I enjoyed reading this chapter. It is interesting to me to be able to read true stories and events. A person gets to feel the same emotions as the writer. This definitely held my attention very well. Thank you for sharing it, my good friend. Best wishes to you and yours and have a wonderful Christmas.
Always with respect,
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Thanks, Eigle, for a review that shows I brought in the reader.
I so appreciate the exceptional rating. Hope you and your family are well.
Comment from sibhus
Ah, the ups and downs of the typical sibling relationship. If someone has brothers or sisters there is always a merry-go-round of disputes, most of the time over something trivial, in hindsight. I understand this so well, my mother has two sons the good one and the other one. I'm sure you can guess who the other one is, even after they stopped speaking. An interesting and well written chapter, Spitfire.
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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Ah, the ups and downs of the typical sibling relationship. If someone has brothers or sisters there is always a merry-go-round of disputes, most of the time over something trivial, in hindsight. I understand this so well, my mother has two sons the good one and the other one. I'm sure you can guess who the other one is, even after they stopped speaking. An interesting and well written chapter, Spitfire.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 30-Nov-2015
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I hear you. Sister considered me the black sheep of the family because I didn't care if the seams in my nylons were straight.
LOL. Both Barb and my daughter would have preferred to be an only child and get all the attention.
Comment from Muffins
Your sister sounded like a person who was in a deep insecure hole. She probably saw you as the strong one, the one without her hang ups.
People like that make it hard to love or even like them, and they are the ones who need it the most. Great background information on your relationship.
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2015
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Your sister sounded like a person who was in a deep insecure hole. She probably saw you as the strong one, the one without her hang ups.
People like that make it hard to love or even like them, and they are the ones who need it the most. Great background information on your relationship.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2015
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Thanks, Muffins. The next two chapters will show her better side.
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
What a complex emotional situation you were in due to Barbara's ego problems. She sounds like a very weak person trying to be strong, which is the worst thing she could have done. I'm sure she wasn't happy, and no doubt blamed everyone but herself. I don't know how you reach people like that, unless they acknowledge their part in the problem and will see a good therapist. Having her die in that awful way had to bother you, since you'd been prevented from being as close as you would have liked. She lost out too, but at least it would all be over for her. Those who went on must have had undeserved regrets to deal with. I admire you for the courage to pour your heart out in this book. I think a lot of readers might learn from your experience, though I don't know if understanding the problem can be much help if the cause of the problem refuses to see it. Sad.
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2015
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What a complex emotional situation you were in due to Barbara's ego problems. She sounds like a very weak person trying to be strong, which is the worst thing she could have done. I'm sure she wasn't happy, and no doubt blamed everyone but herself. I don't know how you reach people like that, unless they acknowledge their part in the problem and will see a good therapist. Having her die in that awful way had to bother you, since you'd been prevented from being as close as you would have liked. She lost out too, but at least it would all be over for her. Those who went on must have had undeserved regrets to deal with. I admire you for the courage to pour your heart out in this book. I think a lot of readers might learn from your experience, though I don't know if understanding the problem can be much help if the cause of the problem refuses to see it. Sad.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2015
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I appreciate your compassionate review. I can't recall if Barb ever went to a therapist, but I doubt it. At least she returned to the church after her marriage to norm. Organized religion is not my thing, but I know it gives some great comfort.
Comment from barkingdog
This is a very comprehensive lead up to the meeting you are about to have with your sister. Facing death, I wonder what she'll act like. Cold and self-centered, she didn't hug during your mother's illness or funeral; will she want a hug or accept one now?
: ellen
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2015
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This is a very comprehensive lead up to the meeting you are about to have with your sister. Facing death, I wonder what she'll act like. Cold and self-centered, she didn't hug during your mother's illness or funeral; will she want a hug or accept one now?
: ellen
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2015
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Yes, I felt our final meeting would have more impact if the reader had more background information.
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Well written story with plenty of high rising action in this one.
Depicts that even though you may be related, individuality can cause distance separation between you.
Wearing a professional mask around siblings, who are not as successful, can cause a divide.
Stage four cancer is a time for families to put their differences aside and come together.
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2015
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Well written story with plenty of high rising action in this one.
Depicts that even though you may be related, individuality can cause distance separation between you.
Wearing a professional mask around siblings, who are not as successful, can cause a divide.
Stage four cancer is a time for families to put their differences aside and come together.
Comment Written 30-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 02-Dec-2015
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Thank you for the insightful review, Brett. Too bad it takes a death sentence for families to forgive one another.
