Drinking Problem -- The Book
Viewing comments for Chapter 6 "Teen Scene -- Conclusion"Alcohol destroys life long friendhip
15 total reviews
Comment from c_lucas
When you steal someone's girlfriend, you don't give them a chance to get even. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a good read.
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2015
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When you steal someone's girlfriend, you don't give them a chance to get even. This is very well written with a smooth flow of words, making for a good read.
Comment Written 01-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2015
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Glad you enjoyed this little tale. Your comments and support appreciated.
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You're Welcome, Brett. Charlie
Comment from frogbook
I read the end before thebeginning but I will go back now because it was a good story and a great era to write about. Characters were interesting and we'll written.
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2015
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I read the end before thebeginning but I will go back now because it was a good story and a great era to write about. Characters were interesting and we'll written.
Comment Written 01-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2015
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Glad you enjoyed this little tale. Your comments and support appreciated.
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Hi, Brett
_ It is so sad about the reality of this type thing happening all the time.
_ This was an excellent chapter/conclusion to the party.
_ Poor Kyle. So many lives shattered.
_ Good write.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax (*<*)
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2015
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Hi, Brett
_ It is so sad about the reality of this type thing happening all the time.
_ This was an excellent chapter/conclusion to the party.
_ Poor Kyle. So many lives shattered.
_ Good write.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax (*<*)
Comment Written 01-Nov-2015
reply by the author on 01-Nov-2015
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Lives shattered. That is what alcohol will do. Glad you enjoyed this little tale. Your comments and support appreciated.
Comment from GE Parson
Interesting story. Mark dies or lives? "It's appointed to everyone to die, after which comes Divine judgment." JHV
Well let's see; If he dies unsaved his judgment will be everlasting suffering in the lake of fire because he chose
to reject God's offer of forgiveness.
"But God is not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance" (Repentance -change of mind concerning faith in Christ; Turn from self righteousness
to Christ's righteousness.)
So inasmuch as God is not willing that he should die until he repents, than I 'm in agreement with God.
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2015
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Interesting story. Mark dies or lives? "It's appointed to everyone to die, after which comes Divine judgment." JHV
Well let's see; If he dies unsaved his judgment will be everlasting suffering in the lake of fire because he chose
to reject God's offer of forgiveness.
"But God is not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance" (Repentance -change of mind concerning faith in Christ; Turn from self righteousness
to Christ's righteousness.)
So inasmuch as God is not willing that he should die until he repents, than I 'm in agreement with God.
Comment Written 29-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 30-Oct-2015
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He died. Glad you enjoyed this story. Your comments and support appreciated.
Comment from Serendipity!
As the writer you must 'have a method in your madness' lol in why you feel Mark must die. I guess the best I can say is let you unfold it the way that seems most logical to you. I would like to see it having an upbuilding affect---somehow, sometime, on the other characters, though.
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2015
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As the writer you must 'have a method in your madness' lol in why you feel Mark must die. I guess the best I can say is let you unfold it the way that seems most logical to you. I would like to see it having an upbuilding affect---somehow, sometime, on the other characters, though.
Comment Written 26-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2015
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Glad you enjoyed this little tale. Your comments and support appreciated.
Comment from Chrissy710
Hi Brett a good finish to your story and you always write an interesting story but if I can be a little critical at times your grammar and spelling is a little awkward so I I may be so bold just a couple of things to look at
The use of coldbloodedily is incorrect the word is an adverb and spelt coldbloodedly ( no i)
when you say keep him breathing air ( seems an over use of the word air what else would he breathe Better to leave air off the sentence.( In fact he would be given oxygen in a hospital as he would be ventilated if critical)
and laying, dying (really awkward) should be lay dying in hospital.....
I dont mean to be too critical and I hope you don't mind me giving you some feedback .
Cheers Christine you are always entertaining though.ð???
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2015
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Hi Brett a good finish to your story and you always write an interesting story but if I can be a little critical at times your grammar and spelling is a little awkward so I I may be so bold just a couple of things to look at
The use of coldbloodedily is incorrect the word is an adverb and spelt coldbloodedly ( no i)
when you say keep him breathing air ( seems an over use of the word air what else would he breathe Better to leave air off the sentence.( In fact he would be given oxygen in a hospital as he would be ventilated if critical)
and laying, dying (really awkward) should be lay dying in hospital.....
I dont mean to be too critical and I hope you don't mind me giving you some feedback .
Cheers Christine you are always entertaining though.ð???
Comment Written 26-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2015
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"Your brother is lay, dying in the hospital"? Not sure I want to change that sentence that way. Glad you enjoyed this. Your comments and support appreciated.
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Hi Brett thanks for considering my comments, and I will read that sentence perhaps I misread that. but appreciate your comsiderations I will get back to you Cheers Christine
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I Brett I have re read that Your brother is laying, dying in the hospital. If you take out the (is) just have Your brother is dying in the hospital or Your brothers lays dying in the hospital I believe it would read much smoother, however it is your story and I guess we all have out way to express things . I know for one I am far from perfect at times with grammar , punctuation and spelling, but sometimes things just stand out. Cheers Anyway Christine
Comment from MizKat
Hi Brett,
This chapter is very interesting even with it's sadness. I don't like the idea of Mark dying though. He's a good part of your story. You are such a great writer I'm sure you could leave Mark in the story and I know you'd be able to figure out how to advance the story with him in it.
Kat
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2015
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Hi Brett,
This chapter is very interesting even with it's sadness. I don't like the idea of Mark dying though. He's a good part of your story. You are such a great writer I'm sure you could leave Mark in the story and I know you'd be able to figure out how to advance the story with him in it.
Kat
Comment Written 25-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2015
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Glad you enjoyed this little tale. Mark's days may be numbered. Vote has not been tallied yet. Running neck in neck. Your comments and support appreciated.
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I look forward to seeing what's going to happen. Will Mark die or stay? Kat
Comment from MelB
A very good story, Brett. What a terrible decision Rex made. Now, he may pay for it for the rest of his life. Very abusive words from father to Kyle. Look forward to the next chapter.
Vote - No
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2015
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A very good story, Brett. What a terrible decision Rex made. Now, he may pay for it for the rest of his life. Very abusive words from father to Kyle. Look forward to the next chapter.
Vote - No
Comment Written 25-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2015
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Glad you enjoyed this little tale. Much more to follow. Your comments and support appreciated.
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You're welcome, Brett.
Comment from doggymad
Great chapter and conclusion. Although I was surprised that this was the last post.
So sad that all this should happen as a result of petty jealousy.
One comment. Over in Ireland lollygagging is sexual in it's usage
hugs
Freda
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2015
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Great chapter and conclusion. Although I was surprised that this was the last post.
So sad that all this should happen as a result of petty jealousy.
One comment. Over in Ireland lollygagging is sexual in it's usage
hugs
Freda
Comment Written 25-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2015
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This is not the last story in this series. Stay tuned. Much more to come. Glad you enjoyed this little tale. Your comments and support appreciated.
Comment from Aiona
I can overlook the typos, because this is such an engaging story. Example of Typos: persistency - I think you needed a noun here, right? "Persistent" is an adjective, but "persistence" is the noun. Is there such a word as "persistency"? According to Google, yes, there is. And it means "persistence." LOL! So I guess this isn't a typo after all. Just a word choice.
Another typo: "pultry" I think you meant "paltry," or possibly "poultry" but I'm pretty sure you meant "paltry."
Well written piece. I think he should die.
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2015
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I can overlook the typos, because this is such an engaging story. Example of Typos: persistency - I think you needed a noun here, right? "Persistent" is an adjective, but "persistence" is the noun. Is there such a word as "persistency"? According to Google, yes, there is. And it means "persistence." LOL! So I guess this isn't a typo after all. Just a word choice.
Another typo: "pultry" I think you meant "paltry," or possibly "poultry" but I'm pretty sure you meant "paltry."
Well written piece. I think he should die.
Comment Written 25-Oct-2015
reply by the author on 25-Oct-2015
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Glad you are enjoying these little tales. Much more to come. Your comments and support appreciated.
