Comment from OLA THOMAS

Excellent

Yes, a rose can dry up if not well nurtured. I like your thought behind this poem. If love and relationships are not well nurtured, they wither and dry up. But truly, true
love never dies because it never lacks nourishments. Nice job.

ola thomas

 Comment Written 09-Oct-2015

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reply by the author on 09-Oct-2015

Thank you Ola for this insightful review.

Comment from Joan E.

Excellent

I enjoyed your message about "true love" and the "book of life". You selected a lovely parallel artwork to reinforce your poem. Best wishes in the contest- Joan

 Comment Written 08-Oct-2015

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reply by the author on 08-Oct-2015

Thanks, Joan for the excellent review. I appreciate it.

Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin

Excellent

Hi, Leslie

_ Beautifully penned and presented with just as lovely artwork.
_ They both complement each other.
_ Nicely penned and presented entry.
_ Good luck in the contest.

Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'... Jax (*:*)

 Comment Written 08-Oct-2015

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reply by the author on 08-Oct-2015

Thanks, Jax for the lovely review. I appreciate it.

Comment from Unspoken94

Excellent

A wonderful and touching romantic Tanka. The contrasts are subtle, the syllable count is right there (forget the "a") and I think you will do well in the contest. I will be voting. -Bill

 Comment Written 08-Oct-2015

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reply by the author on 08-Oct-2015

Thanks Unspoken94 for the great review - I appreciate it.. I agree - I started without the "A" and prefer it. I did add the note so it will not be a problem for reviewers.

Comment from rspoet

Excellent

This is a very fine tanka for the contest
Excellent imagery in the dried red rose
and the pages in the book of life
Excellent concluding line
It has one small problem, I count four syllables in line one
If you agree, you could add an "a" to the beginning
Perfect picture to match
Excellent poem
Good luck in the contest


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 Comment Written 08-Oct-2015

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reply by the author on 08-Oct-2015

Merriam Webster dictionary counts pressed as 1 syllable but 2 others count it as 2. Even so, the contest rules said that 5-7-5-7-7 was just a guideline not required short- long-short-long-long form or even free form was allowed. I left off the "a" (even if line counted as 4) since it seemed more dramatic, but it seems to be a problem for reviewers so maybe I will add the a back in. What do you think?

reply by rspoet on 08-Oct-2015

I also checked on howmanysyllables.com: it said 1 syllable, as well. Since the committee uses many sources, you may be safe if you prefer your original line. It is slightly better without the "a", So if you feel strongly about it, use the original. But put an explanation in author notes, so reviewers won't mark you down.

Comment from MidnightReicheru

Excellent

Love how the picture and the poem fit together. Rod roses and poetry go really nicely together. Only thing I'd point out is that as a Tanka poem, you're missing a syllable in the first line. Great poem though, pressed flowers are really one of the most beautiful things.

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 Comment Written 08-Oct-2015

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reply by the author on 08-Oct-2015

Merriam Webster dictionary counts pressed as 1 syllable but 2 others count it as 2. Even so, the contest rules said that 5-7-5-7-7 was just a guideline not required short- long-short-long-long form or even free form was allowed. I left off the "A" (even if line counted as 4) since it seemed more dramatic, but it seems to be a problem for reviewers so maybe I will add the a back in. What do you think? If I decide to add the "A" back in, can you rerate" if you felt it was still necessary?.

reply by MidnightReicheru on 08-Oct-2015

I think, for sake of ease, putting "A" back in might clear up any confusion but if the contest isn't sticking rigidly to the rules then it shouldn't be a problem. (personally I agree it sounds better without the "A")

reply by the author on 08-Oct-2015

I agree it reads more smoothly with the "A" . I had just tried putting it back in. But without the Dried Red Rose is more prominent. I may put it in for now or if not, add an explanation in the notes about the contest requirements.

reply by MidnightReicheru on 08-Oct-2015

I think that's a good idea if you're going to leave it out, just to eliminate confusion.

reply by the author on 08-Oct-2015

I just did add an explanation in the notes since both reviews mentioned the syllable count.

reply by MidnightReicheru on 08-Oct-2015

Alright. Good luck in the contest!

reply by the author on 08-Oct-2015

Thanks for rerating after I explained the contest requirements. I added the note so not confusing.

reply by the author on 08-Oct-2015

Thanks!

reply by MidnightReicheru on 08-Oct-2015

Not a problem! I love your poem. :)