The Elusive Metaphor
A Villanelle28 total reviews
Comment from Emily George
WELL penned I like the I thought I caught a metaphor. I have better luck with simile.
I did enjoy the wild life that had been done before and your fickle muse.
The picture of the gilted cage wrapped it all up nicely
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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WELL penned I like the I thought I caught a metaphor. I have better luck with simile.
I did enjoy the wild life that had been done before and your fickle muse.
The picture of the gilted cage wrapped it all up nicely
Comment Written 02-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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Thanks, Emily - glad you enjoyed.
Steve
Comment from Dawn Munro
Well, well, I am certainly glad I am not participating in this contest, because I honestly don't think I have seen a Villanelle to compare - this is marvelous! And what a grand idea, to incorporate bits of the poetry of such well-known and much loved bards!
Just fabulous! I'm afraid I am all out of sixes again, though I'm sure your reviews will be mostly sixes anyway, but this is SO exceptional!
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reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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Well, well, I am certainly glad I am not participating in this contest, because I honestly don't think I have seen a Villanelle to compare - this is marvelous! And what a grand idea, to incorporate bits of the poetry of such well-known and much loved bards!
Just fabulous! I'm afraid I am all out of sixes again, though I'm sure your reviews will be mostly sixes anyway, but this is SO exceptional!
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Comment Written 01-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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Dawn, thanks so much for the great review and the virtual six. yes, it's been popular, which is just as well because it's one of those poems where I wasn't really sure myself!
Steve
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You HAVE to be kidding! It's wonderful!
Comment from poetadeu
The villanelle is the most beautiful forms of
poetry that I have read. I have been working
on it for a month and can not get it. It has
eluded me and I think it is because I need to
have something to work toward. Maybe someday
it will fall on the page like Shaksspears feather
pen. Oh, my wouldn't that be a story. This is
fabulous...what more can I say. I love it!
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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The villanelle is the most beautiful forms of
poetry that I have read. I have been working
on it for a month and can not get it. It has
eluded me and I think it is because I need to
have something to work toward. Maybe someday
it will fall on the page like Shaksspears feather
pen. Oh, my wouldn't that be a story. This is
fabulous...what more can I say. I love it!
Comment Written 01-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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Thank you so much for the great review and the six shiny stars. Yes, it's a tricky form with all those repeating lines - good luck getting one done.
Steve
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Yepper, I'll need it...LOL
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Yepper, I'll need it...LOL
Comment from krys123
Steve;
-This Villanelle Is met the requirements for this type of format and in fact it was written quite well with a concept and topic that was very interesting. Or you would have pulled me of not telling me it was not a metaphorical poem for it did well seem so.
-Each of your rhyming words were contingent to the meaning and concept of each line therefore making the rhythm to flow smoothly and where the rhyming was neither force nor labored which was also helpful.
-The rhythmic meter, timing, tempo and cadence are all helpful in making the reading clear, fluid and very easy.
-The caged bird picture was very relative and complementary to your poem.
-There was good use of enjambment which is the running on of a thought in concept one stanza and line to the next without a syntactical break.
-Great imagery that was exquisitely expressive and vividly and demonstratively descriptive.
-Good luck in the contest and may the good Lord be with you always Steve.
Alex
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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Steve;
-This Villanelle Is met the requirements for this type of format and in fact it was written quite well with a concept and topic that was very interesting. Or you would have pulled me of not telling me it was not a metaphorical poem for it did well seem so.
-Each of your rhyming words were contingent to the meaning and concept of each line therefore making the rhythm to flow smoothly and where the rhyming was neither force nor labored which was also helpful.
-The rhythmic meter, timing, tempo and cadence are all helpful in making the reading clear, fluid and very easy.
-The caged bird picture was very relative and complementary to your poem.
-There was good use of enjambment which is the running on of a thought in concept one stanza and line to the next without a syntactical break.
-Great imagery that was exquisitely expressive and vividly and demonstratively descriptive.
-Good luck in the contest and may the good Lord be with you always Steve.
Alex
Comment Written 01-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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Alex, thank you for the great review.
Steve
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You are so very welcome Steve
Comment from MissMerri
A Villanelle is, in my opinion, one of the most difficult of forms to do well. This is incredible. It flows completely naturally, in spite of required repetitions, has all the ingredients of a first-class poem and just for good measure, a strong dose of humor thrown in. It is clever, fun, delightful. Need I say more? Obviously, I loved it.
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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A Villanelle is, in my opinion, one of the most difficult of forms to do well. This is incredible. It flows completely naturally, in spite of required repetitions, has all the ingredients of a first-class poem and just for good measure, a strong dose of humor thrown in. It is clever, fun, delightful. Need I say more? Obviously, I loved it.
Comment Written 01-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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Adonna, thanks so much for the great review and the six stars.
I think this is the first time I have tried a villanelle and I did find it awkward to get the repeating lines to be at all natural. Plus I was rapidly running out of suitable -AGE rhymes!
Steve
Comment from LIJ Red
The albatross fell off and sank like stone into the sea. Yeah, even the vulture, condor and jaybird have had their verses. Great referencing, sound verses, excellent post.
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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The albatross fell off and sank like stone into the sea. Yeah, even the vulture, condor and jaybird have had their verses. Great referencing, sound verses, excellent post.
Comment Written 01-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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Thank you. You're right, once I started thinking about it, there were multiple bird references by our most famous poets...
Steve
Comment from Giddy Nielsen-Sweep
Up there with Dylan Thomas, Steve!! Definitely, and Pete says so too! I love villanelles - they are my favourite form of poetry, but are so hard to write well. This one is superb. I loved the metaphor of the birds in the guise of a metaphor, LOL.You give us all such reading pleasure, Giddy
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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Up there with Dylan Thomas, Steve!! Definitely, and Pete says so too! I love villanelles - they are my favourite form of poetry, but are so hard to write well. This one is superb. I loved the metaphor of the birds in the guise of a metaphor, LOL.You give us all such reading pleasure, Giddy
Comment Written 01-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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Giddy, thanks so much for the lovely review and the six stars.
I have been a little surprised by how popular this poem has been - it's one of those where I started having doubts about whether it was any good or not!
Steve
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Steve, I thought your villanelle had a special sophistication and elegance about it, Giddy
Comment from Bicpen
Excellent ... why don't you use the whore as a metaphor but that also has been penned before ... there is hardly a free thought left in this cage the great intuitive poet will find in similar metaphor different meaning and emphasis hence the genius that is recreation and poetry. Superb !!!
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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Excellent ... why don't you use the whore as a metaphor but that also has been penned before ... there is hardly a free thought left in this cage the great intuitive poet will find in similar metaphor different meaning and emphasis hence the genius that is recreation and poetry. Superb !!!
Comment Written 01-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 02-Sep-2015
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Thanks so much for the great review and the six stars.
Steve
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... anytime ...
Comment from Nosha17
Nice poetic form with excellent rhyming. I liked the way you used references to my two of my favourite poets-Tennyson and Blake. I am glad you didn't fit Angelou in, I do not like her poetry one bit. Nice imagery of the bird-I love them. Good luck in the contest. Faye
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Nice poetic form with excellent rhyming. I liked the way you used references to my two of my favourite poets-Tennyson and Blake. I am glad you didn't fit Angelou in, I do not like her poetry one bit. Nice imagery of the bird-I love them. Good luck in the contest. Faye
Comment Written 01-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Thanks, Faye - glad you enjoyed.
Steve
Comment from sgalletti
Great entry Steve! I hope you had a much fun writing this as I had reading it. This is an extremely clever approach to what could be a very boring prompt. Your use of the repeating lines in different contexts while carrying out the theme of birds in metaphors is brilliant! Excellent entry and I wish you the best of luck in the contest. Sue
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Great entry Steve! I hope you had a much fun writing this as I had reading it. This is an extremely clever approach to what could be a very boring prompt. Your use of the repeating lines in different contexts while carrying out the theme of birds in metaphors is brilliant! Excellent entry and I wish you the best of luck in the contest. Sue
Comment Written 01-Sep-2015
reply by the author on 06-Sep-2015
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Thanks, Sue. You're right, this was a little bit tongue in cheek. i suspect a more serious piece will carry off the prize.
Steve
