Oh to capture.
Moonlight's beams109 total reviews
Comment from Eigle Rull
Thank you, my friend, for sharing this very well written poem of God's love. It brightens my day when it's low, as it is. It is a dedication to the love of God. and how he is love. I enjoyed reading it very much. You have brightened up my day, my friend. I wish I had a six to give you.
Always with respect,
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2015
Thank you, my friend, for sharing this very well written poem of God's love. It brightens my day when it's low, as it is. It is a dedication to the love of God. and how he is love. I enjoyed reading it very much. You have brightened up my day, my friend. I wish I had a six to give you.
Always with respect,
Comment Written 01-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2015
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Thanks Eigle, for this wonderful review, the excellent comments and great rating, and your ever present encouragement, you always brighten mine, blessings, Roy.
Comment from dejohnsrld (Debbie)
But I'm not God I cannot bring,(comma after God)
Just a thought --change the last line of stanza one
speaking like thunder, hope I'd craft.
It's lovely the way it is too. Have a blessed day, my friend~Debbie
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2015
But I'm not God I cannot bring,(comma after God)
Just a thought --change the last line of stanza one
speaking like thunder, hope I'd craft.
It's lovely the way it is too. Have a blessed day, my friend~Debbie
Comment Written 01-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2015
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Thanks Debbie, for this wonderful review, the excellent comments and great rating, and suggestions, I always take notice of you. blessings, Roy.
Comment from Glasstruth
The flow and rhyming here is one of your best. It just rolled off my tongue. The rhythm and meaning is that what's within if true, is all that matters. Wish everybody could see that. Wonderful writing. Les
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2015
The flow and rhyming here is one of your best. It just rolled off my tongue. The rhythm and meaning is that what's within if true, is all that matters. Wish everybody could see that. Wonderful writing. Les
Comment Written 01-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2015
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Thanks Les, for this wonderful review, the excellent comments and great rating, blessings, Roy.
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
What a beautiful, upbeat poem! I love it, Roy. Just needs two more bits of punctuation:
If I a scribe, wrote words like gems
If I, a scribe, wrote words like gems << Corrected
Reason: "a scribe" is between two commas since it is extra info not required. Same for this: My dad, a retired vet, passed away this month. Etc.
But I'm not God I cannot bring
But I'm not God; I cannot bring << Corrected
Reason: You need punctuation to break this line into it's two messages. A comma is not enough, and I think a period breaking it into two sentences is too much. This is a good time to use a semi-colon.
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2015
What a beautiful, upbeat poem! I love it, Roy. Just needs two more bits of punctuation:
If I a scribe, wrote words like gems
If I, a scribe, wrote words like gems << Corrected
Reason: "a scribe" is between two commas since it is extra info not required. Same for this: My dad, a retired vet, passed away this month. Etc.
But I'm not God I cannot bring
But I'm not God; I cannot bring << Corrected
Reason: You need punctuation to break this line into it's two messages. A comma is not enough, and I think a period breaking it into two sentences is too much. This is a good time to use a semi-colon.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 01-Aug-2015
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Thanks Phyllis, for this wonderful review, the excellent comments and great rating, they were like that originally, I always take notice of you, thanks Phyllis, blessings, Roy.
Comment from Angel Debbie
So sweet are your words here. Great rhyme and flow.
I love lightening and storms too. I know once God is done with His thing a rainbow burst through. And all things are better!
Thanks for reminding me. Take care and have a wonderful weekend.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2015
So sweet are your words here. Great rhyme and flow.
I love lightening and storms too. I know once God is done with His thing a rainbow burst through. And all things are better!
Thanks for reminding me. Take care and have a wonderful weekend.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2015
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Thanks Debbie, for the great review and uplifting comments, blessings, Roy.
Comment from Quire's Gal
Hi there. I love the "craft" theme you worked into this poem.. This line is my favorite...
if I could grant all dreams come true
then purest love in cups I'd brew.
Excellent aabb scheme with perfect rhymes and rhythm.
Enjoyed the read.
Quire's gal
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2015
Hi there. I love the "craft" theme you worked into this poem.. This line is my favorite...
if I could grant all dreams come true
then purest love in cups I'd brew.
Excellent aabb scheme with perfect rhymes and rhythm.
Enjoyed the read.
Quire's gal
Comment Written 31-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2015
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Thanks, for the great review and uplifting comments, blessings, Roy.
Comment from Cass Carlton
This is beautiful. What lovely images your words evoke! A couple of things I would suggest you change is the last line of the 3rd verse. Try On golden looms. two withs sounds awkward. Also, what about a comma in the first line of second verse
If I, a scribe, << and lastly, all your apostrophes are correct except the last one. If you read it through it is just a multiple possessive noun Hearts << not heart's.
Lovely piece of work well done cheers Cass
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2015
This is beautiful. What lovely images your words evoke! A couple of things I would suggest you change is the last line of the 3rd verse. Try On golden looms. two withs sounds awkward. Also, what about a comma in the first line of second verse
If I, a scribe, << and lastly, all your apostrophes are correct except the last one. If you read it through it is just a multiple possessive noun Hearts << not heart's.
Lovely piece of work well done cheers Cass
Comment Written 31-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2015
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Thanks Cass for this wonderful review and great comments, very constructive, blessings, Roy
Comment from Sasha
This is beautifully written, deeply moving, excellent rhyme and uplifting tone with equally superb imagery. I enjoyed this very much. Keep up the great work.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2015
This is beautifully written, deeply moving, excellent rhyme and uplifting tone with equally superb imagery. I enjoyed this very much. Keep up the great work.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2015
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Thanks Sasha for the great review and uplifting comments, blessings, Roy.
Comment from Janet7053
This is delightful in a fanciful kind of way. It lilts along with a joyous tone that someone would spread happiness and loveliness this way. Roy, you have several lines in these perfectly rhyming couplets that ignite special thought or consideration:
1. light with silver stems
2. purest love in cups I'd brew
3. sew these worthwhile dreams
I think you mean "makes hearts sing" - plural, not possessive.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2015
This is delightful in a fanciful kind of way. It lilts along with a joyous tone that someone would spread happiness and loveliness this way. Roy, you have several lines in these perfectly rhyming couplets that ignite special thought or consideration:
1. light with silver stems
2. purest love in cups I'd brew
3. sew these worthwhile dreams
I think you mean "makes hearts sing" - plural, not possessive.
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 31-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 31-Jul-2015
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Thanks Janet, for the great review and uplifting comments, I realised the mistake early, but thanks my friend, blessings, Roy.