Comment from Benjamin Valencia

Excellent

Hi Royowen..Just read your testimonial. I may be interpreting your 'illusions wraith' a bit differently. It sounds as if Spring is simply a façade, a temporary departure from humanity remembering what He did for us. Good work and I wouldn't change a thing in your poem. Good effort on the background info. This is definitely historical. Cheers.

 Comment Written 29-Jul-2015

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reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015

Thanks Benjamin, for the great review and and comments, blessings Roy.

Comment from Amy Greta

Excellent

An incredibly insightful piece connected to Janis Joplin's song, war, slavery, freedom and Jesus Christ. I love how you included weather analogies that are unique and full of action; my favorite is the lifting, swirling whirlwind dumping things who knows where, and then it hides and laughs.
Very thought-provoking how you explain that freedom is bought vs won and not just nothing left to lose. Ending, appropriately, with surrender is the ideal closing for your piece,
Excellent!
Amy

 Comment Written 29-Jul-2015

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reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015

Thanks Amy, for the great review and and comments, blessings Roy.

Comment from Glasstruth

Excellent

Freedom is one word that's definitely overused, and often the wrong way. Nice rhythm and rhyming. Has an elegance to its smooth flow. Our future, freedom is like dust that's swirling, but to where? Wonderfully done. Les

 Comment Written 29-Jul-2015

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reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015

Thanks Les, for the great review and and comments, blessings Roy.

Comment from JourneyHolm

Excellent

I quite enjoyed this poem. My suggestions are in brackets for the following two lines:

rains vanish [in the] sand.

[The] whirlwind lifts and swirls the dust

I don't think you need to make these, rather they were what I thought as I read. Thank you for sharing :)

 Comment Written 28-Jul-2015

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reply by the author on 28-Jul-2015

Thank you for the great review, comments and suggestions, Blessings, Roy

Comment from Jay Squires

Excellent

A lovely and inspiring poem.

I do believe that freedom's bought
with blood, a cross, a thorn,
absolved am I from guilt and shame,
my peace from chaos' torn.

One of the most beautiful stanza's of poetry you've written, Roy. I wish I had a six for this.

God Bless.

Jay

 Comment Written 28-Jul-2015

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reply by the author on 28-Jul-2015

Thanks Jay for the wonderful review, and great comments, your approval is payment enough, Blessings Roy

Comment from Phyllis Stewart

Excellent

Beautiful poem, Roy. Bravo! Found somehing to fix:

my peace from chaos' torn. << Remove apostrophe, just CHAOS.

and like a cloud's caught in a storm << You do not NEED the apostrophe on CLOUD.

As it stands, the meaning is "like a cloud IS caught..."

But without the apostrophe it works fine as "like a cloud (that is) caught..."

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 Comment Written 28-Jul-2015

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reply by the author on 28-Jul-2015

Thanks Phyllis for the great review and the grammar tips, blessingsngs, Roy.