Let's Talk Dirty!
Viewing comments for Chapter 82 "An Introduction To The Characters"The story about three women who need to make money
17 total reviews
Comment from rwilliam
OH MY GOSH this was SUPERB!!! Bravo! You did an amazing job with script writing my friend. In fact it was more visual than before and I loved it!
I am so excited for you and for this amazing opportunity. CONGRATULATIONS!!! You've got this! Keep going girl! I can't wait to see the finished product! :-D
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2015
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OH MY GOSH this was SUPERB!!! Bravo! You did an amazing job with script writing my friend. In fact it was more visual than before and I loved it!
I am so excited for you and for this amazing opportunity. CONGRATULATIONS!!! You've got this! Keep going girl! I can't wait to see the finished product! :-D
Comment Written 30-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2015
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I have to admit, I'm really enjoying the challenge. Your encouragement, as always, is a great help, as is your very complimentary six. There I've been trying to do more 'showing' than telling, and now I've been gagged because I can't do any 'showing' at all! I need to be finished by mid-September, so I better keep my nose to the grindstone! Alexis xxx
Comment from Glasstruth
You've done an excellent job in turning this section into a screenplay. There's a lot of tension and a dialogue that begs for further reading. I must admit it's Laura's and Colin's fault for not checking the fine print. In business you can't count on friends from the outside. Money talks. The conflict here sets up further scenes that should be interesting. Awesome start! Les
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2015
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You've done an excellent job in turning this section into a screenplay. There's a lot of tension and a dialogue that begs for further reading. I must admit it's Laura's and Colin's fault for not checking the fine print. In business you can't count on friends from the outside. Money talks. The conflict here sets up further scenes that should be interesting. Awesome start! Les
Comment Written 29-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 30-Jul-2015
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You're absolutely right, Les. They were too wrapped up in building up the business to get a mortgage, so missed the small print. Sad, but true. The beginning of this book has always been difficult because I had to show why each of the women were in such dire straights they had to work for a chat line. The hotel scene was never in the book, nor was the party because I could show it as a memory, which is not possible on film except as a flashback. I've got to say, I'm really enjoying the experience of writing in this format! Alexis xxx
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So far it looks like you're handling it well. Write on! Les
Comment from Walu Feral
G'day Alexis. Top job mate, but not what I was expecting, it was a shock to the system. So are you going to post scripts and the stories or how is it going to work? Great work on this venture. Cheers Fez
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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G'day Alexis. Top job mate, but not what I was expecting, it was a shock to the system. So are you going to post scripts and the stories or how is it going to work? Great work on this venture. Cheers Fez
Comment Written 29-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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I know - it's completely different to prose, isn't it? To be honest, I'm rather enjoying the challenge. Never mind, it's keeping this old dear on her toes!
Alexis xxx
Comment from Ulla
Wow Alexis, I think you have done an absolutely amazing job here. I read with great interest and each scene is so well played out. That is my humble opinion. I don't know the first thing about writing Script but I think you have done a great job. To have to write the screenplay yourself must be an enormous task. I hope it will be well received. You must be busy. Congratulations. Ulla xxx
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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Wow Alexis, I think you have done an absolutely amazing job here. I read with great interest and each scene is so well played out. That is my humble opinion. I don't know the first thing about writing Script but I think you have done a great job. To have to write the screenplay yourself must be an enormous task. I hope it will be well received. You must be busy. Congratulations. Ulla xxx
Comment Written 29-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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I can't believe how much I'm enjoying it, Ulla. At first I was petrified, having never tried scriptwriting in my life, but I'm beginning to learn the technique required. Hopefully, I'll suss it out completely in the end! Alexis xxx
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I am sure you will master it to perfection Alexis. It must exciting, Ulla xxx
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
Well, I know nothing about script
writing, but reading through it, it
all looks pretty good to me, alexis.
I think you've made a good job of it.
and this is wonderful news - good luck, my friend.
Margaret
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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Well, I know nothing about script
writing, but reading through it, it
all looks pretty good to me, alexis.
I think you've made a good job of it.
and this is wonderful news - good luck, my friend.
Margaret
Comment Written 28-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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Lol, that makes two of us, Margaret, but I must admit, I'm enjoying the learning curve. Fingers crossed I can suss it out! Thank you so much for your encouragement, my friend.
Alexis xxx
Comment from Ric Myworld
I can't be much help on my comments or any suggestions about the first scene of your script since I don't know the first thing about writing scripts. However, it appears to cover very everything that makes it a script very well. Good Luck, and wishing you the best!
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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I can't be much help on my comments or any suggestions about the first scene of your script since I don't know the first thing about writing scripts. However, it appears to cover very everything that makes it a script very well. Good Luck, and wishing you the best!
Comment Written 28-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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Lol, I think I've confused a few people with this turn of events - including myself! Thank you so much for your good wishes, Ric. At times like this, I need all the encouragement I can get!
Alexis xxx
Comment from jpduck
First, my disclaimer. (!!) Despite having spent a good part of my life acting in and directing plays, I know nothing about script writing. But I would tentatively make one or two points:
You mention that sounds and character names are normally put in capitals. But, in the scripts of existing plays to be found in books (as used by theatre companies when learning/rehearsing the play) stage directions are written in italics. This may or may not apply to film scripts. But for FS purposes, I think it would be very helpful, and make it easier for people to read.
The second thing that struck me straight away is that for productions designed for the theatre or radio, as opposed to TV/cinema, there is so much that a prose author can do, which a script writer cannot. (eg back story; descriptions of the environment; emotion; reports of a conversation held yesterday; and so forth). But that does not apply to TV/cinema. OK, emotions are down to the actor, but all the rest can be done visually with the freedom offered by the camera. There are some indications in your script that you are trying to use dialogue to do some of those things that are better done visually, normally with additional scenes. A 'scene' in a film is a very different animal from a 'scene' in a stage play. A film scene can last anything from a few seconds upwards, and there are usually hundreds, even thousands of them.
To give an example of this ramble: Much of what is included in the second scene, about what was and wasn't agreed with Abdul, could be better done in one or more previous scenes with Abdul. There could also be a montage sequence of the renovation work. This is all, really, the equivalent of the difference between 'active' and 'passive' writing for the author.
Your courageous leap into script-writing has made me realise what a huge step it is for a prose writer. It has also brought home to me that a film script, in essence, is 90% visual and 10% verbal (although, of course, visual things need to be translated into words in a script).
Please, Alexis, I beg of you, feel free, metaphorically, to throw this into the bin. For, like Manuel, "I know nothing" (even if I'm not from Barcelona).
However, never mind all that; CONGRATULATIONS on being asked by the film producer to write this. I'll be asking for your autograph in a few weeks.
With love and huge respect,
Adrian
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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First, my disclaimer. (!!) Despite having spent a good part of my life acting in and directing plays, I know nothing about script writing. But I would tentatively make one or two points:
You mention that sounds and character names are normally put in capitals. But, in the scripts of existing plays to be found in books (as used by theatre companies when learning/rehearsing the play) stage directions are written in italics. This may or may not apply to film scripts. But for FS purposes, I think it would be very helpful, and make it easier for people to read.
The second thing that struck me straight away is that for productions designed for the theatre or radio, as opposed to TV/cinema, there is so much that a prose author can do, which a script writer cannot. (eg back story; descriptions of the environment; emotion; reports of a conversation held yesterday; and so forth). But that does not apply to TV/cinema. OK, emotions are down to the actor, but all the rest can be done visually with the freedom offered by the camera. There are some indications in your script that you are trying to use dialogue to do some of those things that are better done visually, normally with additional scenes. A 'scene' in a film is a very different animal from a 'scene' in a stage play. A film scene can last anything from a few seconds upwards, and there are usually hundreds, even thousands of them.
To give an example of this ramble: Much of what is included in the second scene, about what was and wasn't agreed with Abdul, could be better done in one or more previous scenes with Abdul. There could also be a montage sequence of the renovation work. This is all, really, the equivalent of the difference between 'active' and 'passive' writing for the author.
Your courageous leap into script-writing has made me realise what a huge step it is for a prose writer. It has also brought home to me that a film script, in essence, is 90% visual and 10% verbal (although, of course, visual things need to be translated into words in a script).
Please, Alexis, I beg of you, feel free, metaphorically, to throw this into the bin. For, like Manuel, "I know nothing" (even if I'm not from Barcelona).
However, never mind all that; CONGRATULATIONS on being asked by the film producer to write this. I'll be asking for your autograph in a few weeks.
With love and huge respect,
Adrian
Comment Written 28-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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I'm glad to say, there are thousands of scripts you can download from the internet free of charge, the most recent being BBC productions. Yes, it is different from stage writing, because the scenes change so often. You have 90 A4 pages (one page per minute if written in Courier New size 12) and the capitals for characters is obviously for the actors ease of referrence, the NOISES for the sound effect guys in case they need a dog barking etc. Fortunately there are also several free to download templates as well, although they all seem slightly different. I'm sticking to the BBC format because I'm pitching to them in September when I get back from France. So far it's just the case of an old dog learning new tricks, but I'm enjoying it immensely!
Thank you so much for your help and encouragement, Adrian. It really does mean a lot to me.
Alexis xxx
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As a matter of interest, how did your meeting with the commissioning producer arise? Please, only answer if you have the time.
Adrian
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Via LinkedIn, where I have over three hundred contacts in the film and publishing industry. Six months ago, I only had a couple of dozen contacts, so I'm delighted to be linked with so many now. Another advantage of social Media!
Comment from Curly Girly
Congratulations in getting a film producer interested.
I don't know much about script, but I was interested to note:
1. What you see and hear is what you get.
2. No thoughts! They can't be seen or heard. Mmm ...
So, how are WE going to celebrate
Suggest:
So, how are we going to celebrate / put the 'we' in italics (slanted font).
when this lot go to bed... any
when this lot go to bed ... any /space
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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Congratulations in getting a film producer interested.
I don't know much about script, but I was interested to note:
1. What you see and hear is what you get.
2. No thoughts! They can't be seen or heard. Mmm ...
So, how are WE going to celebrate
Suggest:
So, how are we going to celebrate / put the 'we' in italics (slanted font).
when this lot go to bed... any
when this lot go to bed ... any /space
Comment Written 27-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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As usual, that's a good suggestion, Nicole. I don't know if the producer's interest will come to anything, but at least it's got me learning a new craft, and I'm really enjoying the challenge. As they say, 'You've got to be in it to win it!'
Alexis xxx
Comment from wordsfromsue
I think it's really good, but I'm not well versed in screenplays. You got the important set up of Colin and Laura's situation across pretty well.
I felt like I was watching a stage play, with the way this was set up. That's good, right?
Exciting cliffhanger at the end!
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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I think it's really good, but I'm not well versed in screenplays. You got the important set up of Colin and Laura's situation across pretty well.
I felt like I was watching a stage play, with the way this was set up. That's good, right?
Exciting cliffhanger at the end!
Comment Written 27-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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Lol, that makes two of us, Sue. I reckon it's been one of the biggest learning curves of my life. There are so many things to memorise, and it's VERY different to writing prose. It's all 'telling' and no 'showing' because the actors and directors want to do their own take on things. As they say, you're never too old to learn new tricks! Thank you again, my friend. Your support has been fantastic.
Alexis xxx
Comment from Spitfire
Congrats on getting a film bite for this! The opening would certainly pique my interest. Dialogue carries the story. As for format, it looks good to me. You might asks Tomes or Ben Colder to check it out. They write screenplays. Their names are high on the script writer list. Congrats again. Now I know how Laura lost Colin and her income as well.
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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Congrats on getting a film bite for this! The opening would certainly pique my interest. Dialogue carries the story. As for format, it looks good to me. You might asks Tomes or Ben Colder to check it out. They write screenplays. Their names are high on the script writer list. Congrats again. Now I know how Laura lost Colin and her income as well.
Comment Written 27-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 29-Jul-2015
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Well, it's early days, but at least it's motivated me to get on with it. The beginning has to be so different from the book because there was only about three lines of dialogue in the first full chapter. Getting there slowly!
Alexis xxx
