The Piano
Memories of my grandparents10 total reviews
Comment from MsPetra
I liked the picture you painted of a beautiful moment in time for you. I'll swear I smelled the blackberry cobbler, yum, yum, yummy.
My most fond memories are of the time I spent with my grandparents.
The only thing I saw that needed correcting was in the first chapter, the fifth sentence. You wrote "ever now and then." It should be "every now and then."
Good luck in the contest. I am pulling for you.
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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I liked the picture you painted of a beautiful moment in time for you. I'll swear I smelled the blackberry cobbler, yum, yum, yummy.
My most fond memories are of the time I spent with my grandparents.
The only thing I saw that needed correcting was in the first chapter, the fifth sentence. You wrote "ever now and then." It should be "every now and then."
Good luck in the contest. I am pulling for you.
Comment Written 17-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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MsPetra, thank you for reviewing my story. Also, thanks for catching my SPAG. I will fix it. I think I often write like I speak and I am guilty of say "ever" instead of every. :o) The Mississippi in me. LOL
Jo
Comment from Walu Feral
G'day Jo. I wish I could say I had such beautiful memories, but I'll enjoy yours instead. What a well written story this is, the imagery is superb. I wonder what little treasure are underneath that knot hole in the wall, that would be interesting. I can see everyone running around looking for things they've lost, and there is little Jo putting them through the hole LOL. Great work my friend and good luck in the contest.....
SPAG ALERT...
"I dust off the keys ever(every) now and then and sit down and bang out a fractured tune."
Cheers Fez
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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G'day Jo. I wish I could say I had such beautiful memories, but I'll enjoy yours instead. What a well written story this is, the imagery is superb. I wonder what little treasure are underneath that knot hole in the wall, that would be interesting. I can see everyone running around looking for things they've lost, and there is little Jo putting them through the hole LOL. Great work my friend and good luck in the contest.....
SPAG ALERT...
"I dust off the keys ever(every) now and then and sit down and bang out a fractured tune."
Cheers Fez
Comment Written 17-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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Fez, I am glad you liked my story. I will go back and change my SPAG. I think I am guilty of writing like I speak and I often say "ever" now and then...instead of every. Just the southern Mississippi girl in me. LOL.
Jo
Comment from Spitfire
A clever way to frame your memories with the first and last paragraph referring to the piano. Great stories especially about the punched out knot.:-)Your detailed descriptions take the reader back in time to enjoy similar memories of their own. (I remember peeing into the bushes rather than make a trip to the out house.)
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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A clever way to frame your memories with the first and last paragraph referring to the piano. Great stories especially about the punched out knot.:-)Your detailed descriptions take the reader back in time to enjoy similar memories of their own. (I remember peeing into the bushes rather than make a trip to the out house.)
Comment Written 16-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 18-Jul-2015
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I am glad to have you reviewing my work. Thanks a lot. I smiled when you wrote about peeing in the bushes. Those old out houses were scary in the daytime and night. :o)
Jo
Comment from meggie13
I enjoyed your recollection of the time spent with your grandparents (maw maw and paw paw). The description of the fun things you did. Your uncle winning the greased pig contest , the pig's escape and the uncles running after it.The old piano and you playing it. Very good imagery. I think your grandmother was a big influence in your life . Well written and a good picture to go with your write.
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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I enjoyed your recollection of the time spent with your grandparents (maw maw and paw paw). The description of the fun things you did. Your uncle winning the greased pig contest , the pig's escape and the uncles running after it.The old piano and you playing it. Very good imagery. I think your grandmother was a big influence in your life . Well written and a good picture to go with your write.
Comment Written 14-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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Thank you meggie for reviewing and commenting on my story. Yes, my grandmother was very special.
Jo
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You are very welcome , Jo. meggie:))
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You are very welcome , Jo. meggie:))
Comment from Clover77
A very well written prose. You did a wonderful job. I truly believe you have a talent. I bid you luck on future writings. Well done
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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A very well written prose. You did a wonderful job. I truly believe you have a talent. I bid you luck on future writings. Well done
Comment Written 14-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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Clover, thank you so much for your kind comments and reviewing my work.
Jo
Comment from abbasjoy
Memories are wonderful, and especially those of ones childhood. I too have many such memories, and yours take me right back to when I was ten years old and used to visit my Aunt and Uncle's house in the country during my summer holidays. Those were the best. They too had an old upright piano. I loved to bang away on those notes, some missing of course. Which old upright had all the notes intact?
Thank you for those memories, Jo. They are a great reminder of days almost long forgotten, but treasured nevertheless.
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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Memories are wonderful, and especially those of ones childhood. I too have many such memories, and yours take me right back to when I was ten years old and used to visit my Aunt and Uncle's house in the country during my summer holidays. Those were the best. They too had an old upright piano. I loved to bang away on those notes, some missing of course. Which old upright had all the notes intact?
Thank you for those memories, Jo. They are a great reminder of days almost long forgotten, but treasured nevertheless.
Comment Written 14-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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I am so glad my memories jogged some of yours. Thank you so much for always being so kind with your comments.
Jo
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You are so welcome.
Comment from writeapoem
I adored this story and how I could relate to it so much. Although Grandma had no piano, she had a rocking chair so many stories she told from there. In the days of the 1890's craze. My two Aunts in the 1950's would take me outback of the farm where wild blackberry vines grew. I too loved Grandmas Blackberry cobbler. This tasty culinary treat is the only reason I would endure the briar cuts, the chiggers, and my aunts tomfoolery. Memories, I heard once are god gifts that death can't destroy. What memories this brought back that brought joy remembering my grandparents, Uncles and Aunts. I now share with my grandchildren.
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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I adored this story and how I could relate to it so much. Although Grandma had no piano, she had a rocking chair so many stories she told from there. In the days of the 1890's craze. My two Aunts in the 1950's would take me outback of the farm where wild blackberry vines grew. I too loved Grandmas Blackberry cobbler. This tasty culinary treat is the only reason I would endure the briar cuts, the chiggers, and my aunts tomfoolery. Memories, I heard once are god gifts that death can't destroy. What memories this brought back that brought joy remembering my grandparents, Uncles and Aunts. I now share with my grandchildren.
Comment Written 14-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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Writeapoem, I am so glad you enjoyed my story and it brought back good memories of your own.
Jo
Comment from Misrael
Count your blessings that you have all those great memories as a lot of people don't have memories like that. Your story is very soothing to the soul and it puts a person in a sort of dream state. Great read and keep on writing.
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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Count your blessings that you have all those great memories as a lot of people don't have memories like that. Your story is very soothing to the soul and it puts a person in a sort of dream state. Great read and keep on writing.
Comment Written 14-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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Misrael, Yes, I do count my blessings every day. My home life was very unstable. My dad was an alcoholic and very abusive to my mother. My grandparents were a haven every summer for one month out of the year.
*My dad later in his late 50's got cirrhosis of the liver and stopped drinking and treated my mom differently. By that time all of us were grown. I have forgiven him and love him very much. He went to be with the Lord eleven years ago. It was a love/hate relationship that has affected me my entire life.
Jo
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I am so sorry to hear that and I too had an abusive father in more ways than one. Not only did he molest me but he was verbally abusive as well. It was also a love hate relationship between the two of us. When my husband and I moved from CA to MN I talked with my parents on the phone and tried to reconcile the relationship between my father and myself and he would have nothing to do with it. He laughed about it I could hear him in the background laughing and saying I was a wimp or something dirogitory about me. Which was nothing new to me. But it still hurt. Two weeks later he was dead. But my conscience is clear because I did what I could and he rejected me once again. But he has been gone since 1991. Yes how we are raised does affect us for our entire lives.
May God bless you richly.
Comment from Eric1
Hi justjo, this is a truly wonderful entry for this particular competition,A lovely revelation of your close knit family and the excellent memories of the old upright piano, I love the way you describe them as paw paw and maw maw, I wish you the best of luck in the contest my friend.
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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Hi justjo, this is a truly wonderful entry for this particular competition,A lovely revelation of your close knit family and the excellent memories of the old upright piano, I love the way you describe them as paw paw and maw maw, I wish you the best of luck in the contest my friend.
Comment Written 14-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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Eric, thank you so much for reviewing and commenting on my story. I am so glad you liked it.
Jo
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You are welcome my friend, apologies for the late reply.
Comment from Michael Ludwinder
I thought this was wonderful. You do an excellent job of showing us this story. My only suggestion is I think there is room to expand upon it. For example, when you swam in the cold water - what was that like. Set a scene and show us a day of swimming in the water. The hesitation to go in - why are we going in - and the joy of entering the water. Great job overall.
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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I thought this was wonderful. You do an excellent job of showing us this story. My only suggestion is I think there is room to expand upon it. For example, when you swam in the cold water - what was that like. Set a scene and show us a day of swimming in the water. The hesitation to go in - why are we going in - and the joy of entering the water. Great job overall.
Comment Written 14-Jul-2015
reply by the author on 15-Jul-2015
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Wow, Michael, thank you so much for the six stars. I am so glad you liked my story. Hmmm, great idea...maybe, my next story will be about the "blue hole" where I swam as a kid. :o)
Jo
