Texas Dream Catcher
Viewing comments for Chapter 51 "Chapter Diecsiete, Part Cuatro"Drug & human trafficking, can romance win?
43 total reviews
Comment from CALLAHANMR
Once again Agent Littleton shows his prejudice toward Indians, and may be framing Kuruk,although Miguel remains my main suspect in the latest murder. He always seems to disappears.
Jim was certainly angered by Littleton's trying to rush Sunni's eating of kuruk's healing herbs.
I wonder more about the identity of Jim. Littleton appears afraid to confront him.
Love and Irish Hugs for great interactions.
Roger
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2015
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Once again Agent Littleton shows his prejudice toward Indians, and may be framing Kuruk,although Miguel remains my main suspect in the latest murder. He always seems to disappears.
Jim was certainly angered by Littleton's trying to rush Sunni's eating of kuruk's healing herbs.
I wonder more about the identity of Jim. Littleton appears afraid to confront him.
Love and Irish Hugs for great interactions.
Roger
Comment Written 21-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 22-Aug-2015
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I so wish you could read them with money attached. Thank you.
Comment from --Turtle.
Hi Barbra, read through this chapter, can't comment too much on what is going on, coming in the middle and there are a lot of people talking, only noticed a few things for you to consider, though. There's a good mix of action with the dialogue, to help keep the people straight.
we were out here?" Soni waited a moment before she went on, (saying,) "I only saw
(suggest adding in the 'saying'... but it might be fine as is too.)
"So, nobody knows where Miguel is." Again, Soni tried to raise* herself. "I don't
Jim carefully forced her raised** shoulders back.
(odd image. I think you are meaning he eased her back on the ground.. as in forcing to lay back down, but it kind of looks like he pushed horizontal to the ground instead of vertical. I paused to get the image straight in my head. Something to recheck?)
Littleton came up to Soni. "As soon as you've finish(ed) eating we can get moving."
(typo?)
Jim stepped toward Ralph with his fist[ed] raised. Alex grabbed his wrist. "You don
(typo?)
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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Hi Barbra, read through this chapter, can't comment too much on what is going on, coming in the middle and there are a lot of people talking, only noticed a few things for you to consider, though. There's a good mix of action with the dialogue, to help keep the people straight.
we were out here?" Soni waited a moment before she went on, (saying,) "I only saw
(suggest adding in the 'saying'... but it might be fine as is too.)
"So, nobody knows where Miguel is." Again, Soni tried to raise* herself. "I don't
Jim carefully forced her raised** shoulders back.
(odd image. I think you are meaning he eased her back on the ground.. as in forcing to lay back down, but it kind of looks like he pushed horizontal to the ground instead of vertical. I paused to get the image straight in my head. Something to recheck?)
Littleton came up to Soni. "As soon as you've finish(ed) eating we can get moving."
(typo?)
Jim stepped toward Ralph with his fist[ed] raised. Alex grabbed his wrist. "You don
(typo?)
Comment Written 25-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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I have been on vacation, so this is very late. Thank you for taking time to review. I will make the corrections.
Comment from Janet7053
This is geographically and culturally accurate which goes a long way in raising interest. This dialogue is credible, and subtle sarcasm in bound to surface under these conditions.
Great Job as an intermediary chapter between climaxes and chapters with action.
one spag:
"...with his fist raised."
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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This is geographically and culturally accurate which goes a long way in raising interest. This dialogue is credible, and subtle sarcasm in bound to surface under these conditions.
Great Job as an intermediary chapter between climaxes and chapters with action.
one spag:
"...with his fist raised."
Comment Written 25-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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I have been on vacation, so this is very late. Thank you for taking time to review. I will make the correction.
Comment from Ric Myworld
Yep, they are going to keep messing with Soni until big Jim finally knocks somebody's butt off. I don't know if it's just an attraction or there is another reason for his protectiveness. Thanks for another fine chapter. :-)
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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Yep, they are going to keep messing with Soni until big Jim finally knocks somebody's butt off. I don't know if it's just an attraction or there is another reason for his protectiveness. Thanks for another fine chapter. :-)
Comment Written 24-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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I have been on vacation, so this is very late. Thank you for taking time to review.
Comment from Mastery
Hi, Barbara. Your chapter rolls right along as usual very good flow and imagery throughout. Dialogue is superb.
Suggestions: (from recap of last post) "Alex put his hand on Jim's left shoulder" (Unless it has some big bearing on the story...just "shoulder" is fine..otherwise it seems like overdone)
This post: " Kuruk placed his hand on Soni's arm. (My personal feeling is that the word "placed" in this case sounds too formal and stiff. Just "put" or "lay" would be better, I think, Barbara.
And: "Soni tried to tease but cringed in pain instead. (reword: "Soni was attempting to tease, but cringed in pain"
I don't care what tom says, barbara...The chapter thing is bad news. I am one of many I would guess that do not know Spanish and therefore the titles etc are meaningless. There must be a solution. something is wrong. Just my opinion, mind you. Bob
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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Hi, Barbara. Your chapter rolls right along as usual very good flow and imagery throughout. Dialogue is superb.
Suggestions: (from recap of last post) "Alex put his hand on Jim's left shoulder" (Unless it has some big bearing on the story...just "shoulder" is fine..otherwise it seems like overdone)
This post: " Kuruk placed his hand on Soni's arm. (My personal feeling is that the word "placed" in this case sounds too formal and stiff. Just "put" or "lay" would be better, I think, Barbara.
And: "Soni tried to tease but cringed in pain instead. (reword: "Soni was attempting to tease, but cringed in pain"
I don't care what tom says, barbara...The chapter thing is bad news. I am one of many I would guess that do not know Spanish and therefore the titles etc are meaningless. There must be a solution. something is wrong. Just my opinion, mind you. Bob
Comment Written 24-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 11-Jul-2015
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I have been on vacation, so this is very late. Thank you for taking time to review. I will make the corrections.
Comment from christianpowers
Oh, my gosh.. I just can't do it. I can't read romance fiction. Every time I try my eyes blur, my attention wanders and I think about taking out the trash or washing the dishes while I'm reading.
But I wanted this dollar twenty so bad I could taste it, so I tried and tried and tried...
Hmmm, and it was strange, jumpin' right in the middle of this at this particular spot. I thought it was a western at first, and my hopes rose up, but then I saw I must have just missed the chapter with all the action in it. All the fighting and dying was over with.
Then the end had that little blurb in it about something going wrong with the childbirth and a helicopter coming, so I was left, in the end, realizing this couldn't be a western either. : (
lol
It was well written, although in parts it seemed like the dialog took on that 'talking head' aspect a lot of dialog can acquire. Otherwise, I saw nothing wrong with this at all.
Thanks for the cash.
Christian
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2015
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Oh, my gosh.. I just can't do it. I can't read romance fiction. Every time I try my eyes blur, my attention wanders and I think about taking out the trash or washing the dishes while I'm reading.
But I wanted this dollar twenty so bad I could taste it, so I tried and tried and tried...
Hmmm, and it was strange, jumpin' right in the middle of this at this particular spot. I thought it was a western at first, and my hopes rose up, but then I saw I must have just missed the chapter with all the action in it. All the fighting and dying was over with.
Then the end had that little blurb in it about something going wrong with the childbirth and a helicopter coming, so I was left, in the end, realizing this couldn't be a western either. : (
lol
It was well written, although in parts it seemed like the dialog took on that 'talking head' aspect a lot of dialog can acquire. Otherwise, I saw nothing wrong with this at all.
Thanks for the cash.
Christian
Comment Written 24-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 24-Jun-2015
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It is a romance set in the 21st century. LOL Thank you for the kind review. Sorry to disappoint.
Comment from Writingfundimension
I find the backstory about Soni's mother fascinating, Barbara. The use of the the cactus for medicinal purposes is well-placed in this chapter. And we realize that Soni must has had some sense that Miguel was off since she doesn't seem at all surprised at his actions.
Another great chapter.
:) Bev
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2015
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I find the backstory about Soni's mother fascinating, Barbara. The use of the the cactus for medicinal purposes is well-placed in this chapter. And we realize that Soni must has had some sense that Miguel was off since she doesn't seem at all surprised at his actions.
Another great chapter.
:) Bev
Comment Written 23-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2015
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I don't think Soni ever trusted Miguel. Thank you for leaving this kind review.
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You're welcome, Barbara, as always. :) Bev
Comment from Ulla
Hi there, I enjoyed the read and am looking forward to continue with the story when you return from your holiday. Please enjoy. In Spain this cactus is called dog-ear. We got several on our land and I didn't know you could eat the fruit. That's interesting. I am going to try. Ulla
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2015
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Hi there, I enjoyed the read and am looking forward to continue with the story when you return from your holiday. Please enjoy. In Spain this cactus is called dog-ear. We got several on our land and I didn't know you could eat the fruit. That's interesting. I am going to try. Ulla
Comment Written 23-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2015
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Thank you for leaving this kind review. Interesting story about the cacti's name in Spain.
Comment from Sis Cat
Vivid dialogue propelled the story forward. I felt I was there listening to the characters. The plot thickens regarding Miguel and other matters. This is tightly written prose that engaged me.
I found one spag. An "e" is needed in your description "Miguel looks more lik a suspect."
This was an enjoyable read. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2015
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Vivid dialogue propelled the story forward. I felt I was there listening to the characters. The plot thickens regarding Miguel and other matters. This is tightly written prose that engaged me.
I found one spag. An "e" is needed in your description "Miguel looks more lik a suspect."
This was an enjoyable read. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 23-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2015
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Thank you for leaving this kind review. Thank you for the spag.
Comment from barkingdog
This chapter had a lot of key interaction. It is very multi-faceted with Soni needing medical care and the agents trying to figure out who killed the four in custody. Miguel being the one they suspect.
I enjoyed the info on prickly pear cactus.
Enjoy your well deserved vacation.
:) ellen
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2015
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This chapter had a lot of key interaction. It is very multi-faceted with Soni needing medical care and the agents trying to figure out who killed the four in custody. Miguel being the one they suspect.
I enjoyed the info on prickly pear cactus.
Enjoy your well deserved vacation.
:) ellen
Comment Written 23-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 23-Jun-2015
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Thank you for leaving this kind review. Yes, there's a lot going on.
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You're welcome.
Have fun.
Read you soon.
:) ellen
