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AM I HUMAN

Viewing comments for Chapter 35 "Chapter 35"
A boy who finds out who or what they are

16 total reviews 
Comment from Ricky1024
Excellent
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Idmt this chapter 35 was well written with great descriptive measures semen imagery it flowed well read well with no grammar issues at all perfect ejective content piece thanks for this doctor Ricky 1024

 Comment Written 11-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 13-Nov-2017
    Thank you so much.
Comment from Meia (MESAYERS)
Excellent
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The general bit down on the deer leg in his hand, wiped the blood off his chin with the back of his hand and closed one eye. "Yes dear," he muttered as he hung his head. ' What an interesting and exciting write. You are very talented. Well done to a fellow Brit keep writing this is ace kind regards Meia xx

 Comment Written 11-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 13-Nov-2017
    Thank you and I am glad you liked it. You made me blush lol.
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
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Hi, DMT

= I enjoyed your story. Although you have it listed under 'General Fiction'. Isn't this more Fantasy?
= You may want to put a quick synopsis/recap at the top of your chapters for peeps like me, just coming into your story. It makes it much easier for us to understand what's happened in the past chapters, then in turn, helps us keep up with present chapter.

=> Need comma
- Jake pushed the ogre away (,)"You're joking!"

=> Always use comma with a direct address.
- "Sorry(,) dear, but he is a human and no match---

= I'm pleased I stopped by. I look forward to reading more.

Cheers, J
Have a good day/evening!
(*>*) A Smile Is A Frown Upside Town (*>*)

 Comment Written 11-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 13-Nov-2017
    Thank you so much. I really appreciate the help.
Comment from apky
Excellent
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An exciting story with lots of action and great dialogue, both of which keep the reader glued to the page and expectant of how things will turn out, who will win which fisticuffs or other fights.

Thanks for an enjoyable story.

 Comment Written 07-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 08-Nov-2017
    Thank you so much.
Comment from giraffmang
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Nice touches of action coupled with the loving family scene at the end. good reading -

"There are three of us and one of you," one of them chortled - need end punctuation here.

we wouldn't sully our hands-on mongrels - no need for the hyphen here.

but I would think... You'd have... a bit - you'd.

as he past the last tree - passed in this instance.

"Is the captain all right." - this should have a question mark.

All the best
G

 Comment Written 07-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 08-Nov-2017
    Thank you so much for all your help.
Comment from Sharon Meda
Excellent
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A good story with strong characters.
The story is well told and clear. Even though I'm starting part way through, I feel that I am understanding what is going on.
Well done.
I look forward to more.
Sharon

 Comment Written 07-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 08-Nov-2017
    Thank you. I appreciate your time.
Comment from GracieAnn
Excellent
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DMT,

This write has a solid story line with engaging dialogue. Creative in how the characters react and interact. :0 GracieAnn

 Comment Written 06-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
    Thank you so much, my friend.
Comment from MTF1955
Excellent
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I totally loved your story. The action keep my interest. The dialogue was spot on. easy to follow and fun to read. Great job. Mary

 Comment Written 06-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
    Thank you so much. I am glad you liked it.
Comment from Wabigoon
Exceptional
This work has reached the exceptional level

DMT--
Kind of reminds me of Hagar the Horrible, the cartoons, if you have ever seen them. But nicely done. I am obviously tuning in way into this, don't know the plot. That is not a detriment here.

Thanks, no "zits" that i noticed.

Best
Wabigoon/Jeff

 Comment Written 06-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
    Thank you for your comments. They are truly appreciated.
Comment from papa55mike
Excellent
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I love the story line and you have good characters. I have a couple suggestions. 1. You need a space in the line: He turned towards the hills and started to run.Jake glanced back. 2. "between two territories" needs to something, maybe Italics to separate it. 3. Please try the next chapter on the Advanced Editor, I can see this in a larger Gothic font to enhance it. Great job!

Have a great day and Go bless.
mike

 Comment Written 06-Nov-2017


reply by the author on 07-Nov-2017
    Thank you so much. Will do that when posting next chapter.