Dark Covenant
Viewing comments for Chapter 21 "Dead Man's Creek Part2"The Berwick Witches Series: Book One
30 total reviews
Comment from Writingfundimension
Good tension in this chapter, Amahra. I can imagine those wolves had to use all their willpower to hold back from killing Charlton. It's an encounter he'll never forget!
Well done!
:) Bev
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2015
Good tension in this chapter, Amahra. I can imagine those wolves had to use all their willpower to hold back from killing Charlton. It's an encounter he'll never forget!
Well done!
:) Bev
Comment Written 08-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2015
-
Thank you so much, Bev, for your continuing support of this book. However, the wolves didn't have to hold back; they only wanted to scare the crap out of Charlie and they did. Remember River promised Jewel he wouldn't hurt or draw blood.
-
Yes, I knew that, but it seems to me the man's weakness, which you describe in detail, might not be a strong temptation no matter the promise.
You're welcome!
:) Bev
Comment from Phyllis Stewart
Exciting chapter, but I feel sorry for Charlie. He's not only going to have nightmares, but he'll be in trouble at work for losing the blood sample. Unless he just replaces it with his own.
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2015
Exciting chapter, but I feel sorry for Charlie. He's not only going to have nightmares, but he'll be in trouble at work for losing the blood sample. Unless he just replaces it with his own.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2015
-
Thanks you, Phyllis.
Comment from c_lucas
Fear will cause one to lose control. Watching a man turn into a wolf is one way fear can control the situation. This is very well written with good imagery.
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2015
Fear will cause one to lose control. Watching a man turn into a wolf is one way fear can control the situation. This is very well written with good imagery.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2015
-
Thank you, Charlie. Always a pleasure.
-
You're welcome, Amahra. Charlie
Comment from Jay Squires
Damn! This was one of your better chapters, Ama. I wanted to give you a 6 SO BAD, but I couldn't because of the SPAG. The first one I was going to overlook, but the misspelling of envelope again and again I had to count. I'm sorry.
See below:
"Stop with the questions already and hand it over." River said. [Comma after "over", not a period.]
pulled out the brown envelop [...the brown ENVELOPE >> misspelled 4 other places. Do a find/replace search in "word"]
I had one question besides the SPAG. I thought they had to chain the werewolves up when the moon was full because they couldn't control themselves. If that's true you might have to work out that inconsistency.
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2015
Damn! This was one of your better chapters, Ama. I wanted to give you a 6 SO BAD, but I couldn't because of the SPAG. The first one I was going to overlook, but the misspelling of envelope again and again I had to count. I'm sorry.
See below:
"Stop with the questions already and hand it over." River said. [Comma after "over", not a period.]
pulled out the brown envelop [...the brown ENVELOPE >> misspelled 4 other places. Do a find/replace search in "word"]
I had one question besides the SPAG. I thought they had to chain the werewolves up when the moon was full because they couldn't control themselves. If that's true you might have to work out that inconsistency.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2015
-
Jay you got stop reading then reviewing me later. I corrected those mistakes hours ago. But thank you anyway. Glade you liked it.
Comment from sweetwoodjax
this is an excellent write, amahra,you did an excellent job writing this chapter where carlton was scared into handing over the tube. I like how river smacked the young wolf upside the head for breaking his promise.
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2015
this is an excellent write, amahra,you did an excellent job writing this chapter where carlton was scared into handing over the tube. I like how river smacked the young wolf upside the head for breaking his promise.
Comment Written 08-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 08-Jun-2015
-
Thank you sweetwoodjax. Really glad you're hanging in there with my book.
Comment from JourneyHolm
Cool story. To be honest, I thought the dialogue was a little weak. However, the characterization and imagery made up for it. So too, the plot seems to make up for the dialogue. I am curious what has happened and what will happen. Thank you for sharing.
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2015
Cool story. To be honest, I thought the dialogue was a little weak. However, the characterization and imagery made up for it. So too, the plot seems to make up for the dialogue. I am curious what has happened and what will happen. Thank you for sharing.
Comment Written 07-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2015
-
Thank you JourneyHolm.
Comment from royowen
What a horrible thing to happen to anyone. Charlton has been confronted by the wolves and apart from a slash to his face and a little mess in his trousers, is relatively safe. I wonder what will happen now? The have the vial of boy's blood disposed of, I wonder if they've scared Charlton so badly, he won't tell who they really are! Good writing, Amahra, is this the beginning of something bad, or something coming to an end, well done, blessings, Roy.
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2015
What a horrible thing to happen to anyone. Charlton has been confronted by the wolves and apart from a slash to his face and a little mess in his trousers, is relatively safe. I wonder what will happen now? The have the vial of boy's blood disposed of, I wonder if they've scared Charlton so badly, he won't tell who they really are! Good writing, Amahra, is this the beginning of something bad, or something coming to an end, well done, blessings, Roy.
Comment Written 07-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2015
-
Thank you so much, roy. It's the beginning for some and an end to others. Next chapter will make that clear. Always appreciate your support of this book. Blessings.
-
Most welcome
Comment from Cass Carlton
One typo Hideous not hidious and a query "envelop" should it be 'envelope"? Australian and US spelling does differ . This is a very exciting story with some terrifying characters in it. I felt a real sympathy for Charlton wetting and worse in his pants, I think I'd have done the same faced with six lycanthropic bullies doing their hairy transformation in front of me. Great scare the living daylights stuff in this . Good dialogue, good movement of action . I hope Charlton has a chance to win through and the dark forces get their commupance . Not before a bit more of what you're offering here though. Great stuff cheers Cass
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2015
One typo Hideous not hidious and a query "envelop" should it be 'envelope"? Australian and US spelling does differ . This is a very exciting story with some terrifying characters in it. I felt a real sympathy for Charlton wetting and worse in his pants, I think I'd have done the same faced with six lycanthropic bullies doing their hairy transformation in front of me. Great scare the living daylights stuff in this . Good dialogue, good movement of action . I hope Charlton has a chance to win through and the dark forces get their commupance . Not before a bit more of what you're offering here though. Great stuff cheers Cass
Comment Written 07-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2015
-
Thank you so much, Cass. And I corrected the typos. So glad you caught them.
Comment from justafan
I bet he did chit his pants...I know I would have...Great chapter!!! I love this story "A". You certainly draw the reader in.
Always justafan,
Missy
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2015
I bet he did chit his pants...I know I would have...Great chapter!!! I love this story "A". You certainly draw the reader in.
Always justafan,
Missy
Comment Written 07-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2015
-
Thank you so much, Missy. I'm glad you liked it.
Comment from buggaboo4699
I've been following since the beginning and is truly enjoyable to read. Is very well written and I can't find anything wrong with it. I would give it six stars if I had them left. Thanks for sharing!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2015
I've been following since the beginning and is truly enjoyable to read. Is very well written and I can't find anything wrong with it. I would give it six stars if I had them left. Thanks for sharing!
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 07-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 07-Jun-2015
-
Thank you, guggaboo4699.