Maggie's Kiss
A Car crash leaves a man hanging onto life.26 total reviews
Comment from Father Flaps
Hi Rhonda,
It's no wonder you won the contest with this 100 word flash. Nicely accomplished. Sally, a paramedic (I'm thinking), became Maggie for just a brief moment, kissing Harry lightly on the lips. It calmed him down, and they were able to get him hooked up to IV and save his life. In recovery, he would have to deal with the loss of his girlfriend.
This made me think of that 1964 hit song, "Last Kiss", by J Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers.
Nicely penned!
Hugs,
Kimbob
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Hi Rhonda,
It's no wonder you won the contest with this 100 word flash. Nicely accomplished. Sally, a paramedic (I'm thinking), became Maggie for just a brief moment, kissing Harry lightly on the lips. It calmed him down, and they were able to get him hooked up to IV and save his life. In recovery, he would have to deal with the loss of his girlfriend.
This made me think of that 1964 hit song, "Last Kiss", by J Frank Wilson and the Cavaliers.
Nicely penned!
Hugs,
Kimbob
Comment Written 27-Oct-2023
reply by the author on 27-Oct-2023
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Thank you Kimbob. I had to go back and reread the story, lol. I had almost forgotten it. I need to go back to doing the challenges. They're fun. I just got back into writing really, since the bull incident, then I had two more years of surgery afterwards that started from a benign tumor.
Back now, though, and put the rest behind me, as you said.
Hugs,
Rhonda
Comment from mfowler
It took me a moment, and then I realised the paramedic had stepped in and given the dying man a special kiss of life. Very well conceived and the reveal is perfectly placed. Great little mini-flash, Rhonda. You deserved this win, albeit shared.
reply by the author on 26-May-2015
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It took me a moment, and then I realised the paramedic had stepped in and given the dying man a special kiss of life. Very well conceived and the reveal is perfectly placed. Great little mini-flash, Rhonda. You deserved this win, albeit shared.
Comment Written 26-May-2015
reply by the author on 26-May-2015
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Thank you so much! I had fun with it, after all, it's 100 words, right? Actually, I think it takes longer for 100 words then 1000. Thanks for reviewing!
Rhonda
Comment from MelB
I can see why this was a contest winner, my friend. Great twist on the first kiss between strangers prompt. Sally's quick thinking saved Harry's life. Well done and congratulations on the win!
reply by the author on 26-May-2015
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I can see why this was a contest winner, my friend. Great twist on the first kiss between strangers prompt. Sally's quick thinking saved Harry's life. Well done and congratulations on the win!
Comment Written 26-May-2015
reply by the author on 26-May-2015
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Thank you so much! I had fun with it, and I think the others did, too! Thanks for reading and letting me know how you felt about the story. You are a great reviewer!
Comment from rjuselius
this is a well deserved win dear davisr! the story is compelling and glues the reader to the screen. the finish is well thought out and the turn of events truly interesting.
thank you for sharing!
blessings!
rebekka x
reply by the author on 26-May-2015
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this is a well deserved win dear davisr! the story is compelling and glues the reader to the screen. the finish is well thought out and the turn of events truly interesting.
thank you for sharing!
blessings!
rebekka x
Comment Written 26-May-2015
reply by the author on 26-May-2015
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Thank you, Rebekka. It was fun to write, and it was a different take on a stranger's kiss, or at least I tried to make it so. Thanks for your comments,
Rhonda
Comment from Green Lake Girl
Congratulations on this contest win. You conveyed a lot in just 100 words. A sad scene made better by a kind and caring EMT. Perhaps the kiss that saves his life. Well done.
reply by the author on 25-May-2015
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Congratulations on this contest win. You conveyed a lot in just 100 words. A sad scene made better by a kind and caring EMT. Perhaps the kiss that saves his life. Well done.
Comment Written 25-May-2015
reply by the author on 25-May-2015
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Thank you so much! What a sweet review. The EMTs have a hard job to do and often have to make hard choices. Thanks, again,
Rhonda
Comment from Bill Schott
So poignant. This one parallels real life as I have read of instances like this (perhaps without the kissing) where someone stood in to provide life sustaining encouragement or even a last good emotion posing as another.
reply by the author on 25-May-2015
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So poignant. This one parallels real life as I have read of instances like this (perhaps without the kissing) where someone stood in to provide life sustaining encouragement or even a last good emotion posing as another.
Comment Written 25-May-2015
reply by the author on 25-May-2015
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Thank you, Bill. I've done it myself with elderly patients when I worked in a nursing home going through college (minus the kiss). Thanks again..
Comment from jpduck
Yes, this works ... I think. I had to re-read it to sort out my Maggies from my Sallys. But I think I got there in the end. Good luck with the contest.
'Maggie was dead, and lay tangled in a mass of twisted metal.' (Insert a blank line after this to mark the new paragraph).
Adrian
reply by the author on 25-May-2015
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Yes, this works ... I think. I had to re-read it to sort out my Maggies from my Sallys. But I think I got there in the end. Good luck with the contest.
'Maggie was dead, and lay tangled in a mass of twisted metal.' (Insert a blank line after this to mark the new paragraph).
Adrian
Comment Written 25-May-2015
reply by the author on 25-May-2015
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Okay, I will do that, thanks Adrian. Also thanks for the review. I will see what I can do to make the people a bit clearer! Again, many thanks.
Comment from TPAC
Action and poet tries to deliver it and does bring drama through script well presented causing the reader to hang on awaiting each line A lovely write Thanks for sharing
reply by the author on 25-May-2015
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Action and poet tries to deliver it and does bring drama through script well presented causing the reader to hang on awaiting each line A lovely write Thanks for sharing
Comment Written 25-May-2015
reply by the author on 25-May-2015
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Thank you so much for the review and thoughtful comments.
Comment from Jacqueline M Franklin
Hi...
Great story. She made the right call to get her patient stabilized. Such a sad thing, but happens ever day.
Good luck in the contest.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'.... Jax (*;*)
reply by the author on 25-May-2015
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Hi...
Great story. She made the right call to get her patient stabilized. Such a sad thing, but happens ever day.
Good luck in the contest.
Cheers & Blessings
Keep Smilin'.... Jax (*;*)
Comment Written 25-May-2015
reply by the author on 25-May-2015
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Thank you so much, Jax, for reading and commenting!
Comment from royowen
A lovely 100 word dash entry in this contest. The kiss of a fair maid on the lips of a man who was in life decline did the trick, he looks like he revived, Well done, good entry, good luck, blessings Roy.
reply by the author on 25-May-2015
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A lovely 100 word dash entry in this contest. The kiss of a fair maid on the lips of a man who was in life decline did the trick, he looks like he revived, Well done, good entry, good luck, blessings Roy.
Comment Written 25-May-2015
reply by the author on 25-May-2015
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Thank you, Roy. First Responders have to make many quick and compassionate choices while fighting for life. This is my attempt to give them some credit. Thanks for your review!
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Well done,
