When Blood Collides
Viewing comments for Chapter 23 "Blind-Sided "A family's love is tested.
27 total reviews
Comment from I am Cat
What? We're going on vacation?
Yee ha! Seriously? She bought a villa?
what?
now who talked her into that?
let me guess?
oh boy... here we go.
lol
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2015
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What? We're going on vacation?
Yee ha! Seriously? She bought a villa?
what?
now who talked her into that?
let me guess?
oh boy... here we go.
lol
Comment Written 06-Aug-2015
reply by the author on 06-Aug-2015
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It happened so fast--all in one day. No chance to talk it over with us. Thanks for playing catch-up. :-)
Comment from Tatarka2
I love the way you're telling this story - just the facts, ma'am, not a trace of self-pity, or self-congratulation for taking care of your mother. A tiny suggestion, humbly offered: I think this might be even more powerful (and, having read some of your other pieces, I know you can do it) if you included more sensory details: how did Ashton Gardens feel/smell when you went there? Surely your mom felt many more emotions besides "triumph," and you probably saw all of them, on her face when she came in and announced her decision? How does it feel to you when you and your sister fight? Does it remind you of your childhood? How? Just a few suggestions, humbly offered. I think this is an important piece, and I'm so glad you're telling this story.
reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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I love the way you're telling this story - just the facts, ma'am, not a trace of self-pity, or self-congratulation for taking care of your mother. A tiny suggestion, humbly offered: I think this might be even more powerful (and, having read some of your other pieces, I know you can do it) if you included more sensory details: how did Ashton Gardens feel/smell when you went there? Surely your mom felt many more emotions besides "triumph," and you probably saw all of them, on her face when she came in and announced her decision? How does it feel to you when you and your sister fight? Does it remind you of your childhood? How? Just a few suggestions, humbly offered. I think this is an important piece, and I'm so glad you're telling this story.
Comment Written 05-May-2015
reply by the author on 05-May-2015
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Good suggestions, my friend, and I'll take them to heart. Thanks a bunch.
Comment from Muffins
I can relate to this statement:"Yes, I wanted the house all to myself when I came home from work." My mother, who is not the age of your mother in this piece, due to not planning for retirement came to live with me once for a year and three years later one more year. However, that year turned into three. It was emotional, mental and spiritually draining. Only through my research did she move into an apartment of her own over two years ago.
You did have a right and the announcement your mother made, I hope you took it as a sign that it was time for a change. Crossing fingers for chapter two.
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2015
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I can relate to this statement:"Yes, I wanted the house all to myself when I came home from work." My mother, who is not the age of your mother in this piece, due to not planning for retirement came to live with me once for a year and three years later one more year. However, that year turned into three. It was emotional, mental and spiritually draining. Only through my research did she move into an apartment of her own over two years ago.
You did have a right and the announcement your mother made, I hope you took it as a sign that it was time for a change. Crossing fingers for chapter two.
Comment Written 30-Apr-2015
reply by the author on 30-Apr-2015
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Our mothers both came from a generation where big families sometimes all lived in the same (large) house. Nursing homes got a bad rap. So much has changed for our age group now and thankfully, I've planned ahead. I love my children but don't want to live with either one of them.
This solution worked for me. Sometimes your self has to come first.
Comment from w.j.debi
Your life reads better than a novel. There always seems to be some drama unfolding. You just get one corner of life under control and the next one starts. I like how you examine both sides--the good and the bad of any outcome.
I've read several things tonight, including part of a novel, and this was the best written. Your characters are intriguing and the emotional entanglements realistic.
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2015
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Your life reads better than a novel. There always seems to be some drama unfolding. You just get one corner of life under control and the next one starts. I like how you examine both sides--the good and the bad of any outcome.
I've read several things tonight, including part of a novel, and this was the best written. Your characters are intriguing and the emotional entanglements realistic.
Comment Written 28-Apr-2015
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2015
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What a heart warming review, debi, and thanks a million for the sixer. I'm so encouraged by your remarks. I hope you'll continue to follow. The real drama has yet to come.
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Of course I intend to keep following. You have me hooked. :)
Comment from abbasjoy
Well, that sure solves your problem, even without you doing or saying anything negative about your mom staying with you.
It's really difficult to make decisions, about your parents that are aging, and keep everyone happy.
Fortunately, I didn't have to make that decision regarding my mother, as she was living in her own home, which was actually a guest house. She had helpers, and one day she just said she wasn't feeling well, and asked our gardener/ chauffeur to take her to the hospital. She had a heart attack in the car, and was pronounced dead on arrival.
The thing with aging parents, especially those that can still make their own decision, they are unpredictable, and like your mom, may just decide to get up and leave.
In a sense this situation is a win/win, as it alleviates any guilt on your part.
Hope this works out for the best.
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2015
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Well, that sure solves your problem, even without you doing or saying anything negative about your mom staying with you.
It's really difficult to make decisions, about your parents that are aging, and keep everyone happy.
Fortunately, I didn't have to make that decision regarding my mother, as she was living in her own home, which was actually a guest house. She had helpers, and one day she just said she wasn't feeling well, and asked our gardener/ chauffeur to take her to the hospital. She had a heart attack in the car, and was pronounced dead on arrival.
The thing with aging parents, especially those that can still make their own decision, they are unpredictable, and like your mom, may just decide to get up and leave.
In a sense this situation is a win/win, as it alleviates any guilt on your part.
Hope this works out for the best.
Comment Written 28-Apr-2015
reply by the author on 28-Apr-2015
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Lucky you. Personally, I love my children, but wouldn't want to live with them. Mom didn't want to live with my other two sisters, not even for a month. A burden to put on me. Thanks for tuning in. :-)
Shari
Comment from Walu Feral
G'day Shari. This is another great chapter mate, very interesting and well written. That picture of the dining room is outrages, crikey, I don't think they'd let me into a place like that. I have to say that I got a shock when Mum bought the place at KP, it was not what I expected, great use of a twist my friend. Cheers Fez
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2015
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G'day Shari. This is another great chapter mate, very interesting and well written. That picture of the dining room is outrages, crikey, I don't think they'd let me into a place like that. I have to say that I got a shock when Mum bought the place at KP, it was not what I expected, great use of a twist my friend. Cheers Fez
Comment Written 27-Apr-2015
reply by the author on 27-Apr-2015
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Thanks, Fez. I feel like she was railroaded into it.
Comment from judiverse
You have a lot of personal drama going in this. People always speculate how things might have turned out differently if they had made different choices, like your mother saying moving to the Gardens might have prevented his heart attack. You have conflicted feelings about staying home to care for your mother or to continue teaching. Anne and Dee seemed quite determined to get your mother to move our of your home. Her announcement that she'd bought a villa must have been a shock. Great presentation of this family situation. judi
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015
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You have a lot of personal drama going in this. People always speculate how things might have turned out differently if they had made different choices, like your mother saying moving to the Gardens might have prevented his heart attack. You have conflicted feelings about staying home to care for your mother or to continue teaching. Anne and Dee seemed quite determined to get your mother to move our of your home. Her announcement that she'd bought a villa must have been a shock. Great presentation of this family situation. judi
Comment Written 26-Apr-2015
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015
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Great summary too, judi. I'll always wonder if her move hastened her death a little over a year later.
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It doesn't seem to do much good wondering about those things. Had she remained with you, she might have died at the same time. judi
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Point taken. :-)
Comment from Brett Matthew West
Sounds like your typical dysfunctional family. Action flows well. Story line easy to follow if not somewhat predictable. Descriptive language well used. Write on.
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015
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Sounds like your typical dysfunctional family. Action flows well. Story line easy to follow if not somewhat predictable. Descriptive language well used. Write on.
Comment Written 26-Apr-2015
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015
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Thanks, Brett. It's sad that it is predictable and typical. It's our reactions that make it different.
Comment from lakeport
Blind sided, indeed it is very sad when a family always argues and cant get along.
Thanks for sharing the story, God bless you. Hugs! lakeport.
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015
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Blind sided, indeed it is very sad when a family always argues and cant get along.
Thanks for sharing the story, God bless you. Hugs! lakeport.
Comment Written 26-Apr-2015
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015
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Unfortunately, my story is one of millions. I envy families who have no conflicts. Is that possible?
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you are very welcome. Hugs! lakeport.
Comment from boxergirl
Glad I had a six for this. You described the emotional deliema of having to make choices regarding care for aging parents and then your description of how exhausting it is to be a conscientious teacher was spot on. Most people think a teacher's job is over at the bell. They have no clue! 8-)
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015
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Glad I had a six for this. You described the emotional deliema of having to make choices regarding care for aging parents and then your description of how exhausting it is to be a conscientious teacher was spot on. Most people think a teacher's job is over at the bell. They have no clue! 8-)
Comment Written 26-Apr-2015
reply by the author on 26-Apr-2015
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I take it you're a teacher too. I appreciate the exceptional rating. The difficulty of my job was the only explanation I could find for rejecting Mom.
