A Re-declaration
Word acrostic with rhyme.22 total reviews
Comment from Judy Couch
Your poem expresses well what all of us hope and pray for. I'm not sure of the dirction this country is heading now. I hope it is toward liberty and justice for all.
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Your poem expresses well what all of us hope and pray for. I'm not sure of the dirction this country is heading now. I hope it is toward liberty and justice for all.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2015
Comment from Pam (respa)
-Excellent photo and presentation.
-A very good subject for the contest.
-The first line has an interesting word arrangement and is also effective with the use of alliteration.
-In the next two lines the freedoms we fought for are effectively presented.
-In line four an interesting juxtaposition of "hanging on by nail and by tooth".
-The last two lines summarize what our forefathers wanted to achieve and what we are still striving for today.
-"with liberty and justice for all..." is a profound way to end your poem.
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-Excellent photo and presentation.
-A very good subject for the contest.
-The first line has an interesting word arrangement and is also effective with the use of alliteration.
-In the next two lines the freedoms we fought for are effectively presented.
-In line four an interesting juxtaposition of "hanging on by nail and by tooth".
-The last two lines summarize what our forefathers wanted to achieve and what we are still striving for today.
-"with liberty and justice for all..." is a profound way to end your poem.
Comment Written 25-Apr-2015
Comment from Jumbo J
Hi Mike,
interesting new form, I must admit I've never seen before... and after going in to read the out-line and structure, looks like you've nailed it... so great job there brother.
Shame the ideal didn't carry on to today's end result... after all the blood, sweat and tears that formed a new nation of hope... so many blurred scenes take away any dreaming of equality.
But in saying that, I thought you created a heart-warming rhymed poem of quality... visually and construction... so, all the best in this contest friend... you're always a contender!
With our thoughts we create,
the action of our beliefs.
James.
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Hi Mike,
interesting new form, I must admit I've never seen before... and after going in to read the out-line and structure, looks like you've nailed it... so great job there brother.
Shame the ideal didn't carry on to today's end result... after all the blood, sweat and tears that formed a new nation of hope... so many blurred scenes take away any dreaming of equality.
But in saying that, I thought you created a heart-warming rhymed poem of quality... visually and construction... so, all the best in this contest friend... you're always a contender!
With our thoughts we create,
the action of our beliefs.
James.
Comment Written 20-Apr-2015
Comment from Deborah Marie
Beautiful presentation from photo to clever wording to color scheme. How did you put in the beautiful rose at the end into your poem? I've been trying to do that but, I don't know how. Can you please help me? I'd appreciate it. It's a wonderful touch to your poem, Deb
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Beautiful presentation from photo to clever wording to color scheme. How did you put in the beautiful rose at the end into your poem? I've been trying to do that but, I don't know how. Can you please help me? I'd appreciate it. It's a wonderful touch to your poem, Deb
Comment Written 20-Apr-2015
Comment from l.raven
Michael, it doesn't mater what the form is...you in your unique way of writing always makes it come through perfect...you are and always will be talent in writing....I love this ...very well said...and very well written... Luff Linda xxoo
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Michael, it doesn't mater what the form is...you in your unique way of writing always makes it come through perfect...you are and always will be talent in writing....I love this ...very well said...and very well written... Luff Linda xxoo
Comment Written 19-Apr-2015
Comment from CR Delport
It is easy for young people to look around today and see what we have, but most don't understand what it took to get here. This is well done and good luck.
Take care.
Christelle.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2015
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It is easy for young people to look around today and see what we have, but most don't understand what it took to get here. This is well done and good luck.
Take care.
Christelle.
Comment Written 19-Apr-2015
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2015
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Glad you liked it. Thank you very much, mikey
Comment from patcelaw
Michael Cahill You understood the concept of a word acrostic and did an excellent job. There have been some good entries and I might have a hard time voting. I know I will not vote for my own. :-)
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2015
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Michael Cahill You understood the concept of a word acrostic and did an excellent job. There have been some good entries and I might have a hard time voting. I know I will not vote for my own. :-)
Comment Written 18-Apr-2015
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2015
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Thank you! I thought your piece was great and kind of used it as my guide. :) This is a great new form. You should vote for yourself, we all do. :)
(unless you vote for me. Hahaha.)
Comment from Alan K Pease
This must be a time for much thinking as we seem to becoming more divided due to frustration with the price of liberty when police tear our liberty down, frustrations with politicians who cannot cooperate, or wars of religion are now being fought. All of these we solved in the Declarations/Constitutions we have made and maybe the new ones should be written with the same words. Excellent attempt with just a few words of rhyme, alliteration, emjambment and substance.
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2015
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This must be a time for much thinking as we seem to becoming more divided due to frustration with the price of liberty when police tear our liberty down, frustrations with politicians who cannot cooperate, or wars of religion are now being fought. All of these we solved in the Declarations/Constitutions we have made and maybe the new ones should be written with the same words. Excellent attempt with just a few words of rhyme, alliteration, emjambment and substance.
Comment Written 18-Apr-2015
reply by the author on 19-Apr-2015
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Thank you for the great review and insights. I couldn't agree more.
Comment from nelliesellie
I love the picture. I love the theme. Our ancestors fought for rights for all. It was very hard. Then the war was over. It was harder to put their thoughts in to action. But we are getting there. Great work.
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I love the picture. I love the theme. Our ancestors fought for rights for all. It was very hard. Then the war was over. It was harder to put their thoughts in to action. But we are getting there. Great work.
Comment Written 18-Apr-2015
Comment from K. Lorraine
This is probably the best poem of all...
It has a great message - story line...
The rhyming is wonderful...
The message is what we as Americans need to be reminded of...
And everyone knows you are one of the best writers on FS...
Therefore, nothing short of being the best is expected from you...
Best of luck in the contest...
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This is probably the best poem of all...
It has a great message - story line...
The rhyming is wonderful...
The message is what we as Americans need to be reminded of...
And everyone knows you are one of the best writers on FS...
Therefore, nothing short of being the best is expected from you...
Best of luck in the contest...
Comment Written 18-Apr-2015
