Charlie The Cat
A story from a cat's point of view33 total reviews
Comment from Cat of Letters
Hi Charlie,
A meow from Zahir! I like the photo of you with your feline family.
I noticed your moustache, I thought it very sophisticated. At least they didn't call you Adolf!
Sounds to me like you have your servants well trained.
I have given you a few edits and suggestions:
human mum and dad small m and d.
real mother and brother small m and b.
Tabby small t
father/father's small f
Only use the capital in all the cases is addressing one of these relatives. 'Meow, Mum'.
or 'I like the tuna too, Brother.'
In all cases in this story all your relatives human and feline are small case, no capitals.
We live in the country (comma)
highly pregnant (remove the highly)
humans small H
We are all pretty much obeying
We pretty much obey
give in to our ways
Another one I hate I hate is if they read . . . when I want all their attention.
to catch their eye (singular)
what I then do (remove the comma)
in front of them (insert comma)
one of them giveS in
human Parents, small p
stomach is growling (not grovelling)
__
Good luck in the contest.
Zahir
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2015
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Hi Charlie,
A meow from Zahir! I like the photo of you with your feline family.
I noticed your moustache, I thought it very sophisticated. At least they didn't call you Adolf!
Sounds to me like you have your servants well trained.
I have given you a few edits and suggestions:
human mum and dad small m and d.
real mother and brother small m and b.
Tabby small t
father/father's small f
Only use the capital in all the cases is addressing one of these relatives. 'Meow, Mum'.
or 'I like the tuna too, Brother.'
In all cases in this story all your relatives human and feline are small case, no capitals.
We live in the country (comma)
highly pregnant (remove the highly)
humans small H
We are all pretty much obeying
We pretty much obey
give in to our ways
Another one I hate I hate is if they read . . . when I want all their attention.
to catch their eye (singular)
what I then do (remove the comma)
in front of them (insert comma)
one of them giveS in
human Parents, small p
stomach is growling (not grovelling)
__
Good luck in the contest.
Zahir
Comment Written 02-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2015
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Ok, Thanks a lot for your very useful comments as usual. I thought mum and dad should have been in capital as they are used as names. I am learning all the time. Thanks again I much appriciate and will revise once the competition has finished. Still doing ings and ly's, thought I had pretty much got rid of them. thanks again. Ulla
Comment from pennedup
This is a wonderfully written from Charlie the Cats view of things. I might be bias because I too have a "Charlie the Cat".. ( : Enjoyed the insight from Charlie's eyes of life at mom and dad's.
Thanks for sharing. ^-^
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2015
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This is a wonderfully written from Charlie the Cats view of things. I might be bias because I too have a "Charlie the Cat".. ( : Enjoyed the insight from Charlie's eyes of life at mom and dad's.
Thanks for sharing. ^-^
Comment Written 02-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2015
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Thanks a lot for your kind review. Ulla
Comment from giraffmang
Hello there,
This is a good entry into the pet competition.
I especially liked the little segment on Charlie Chaplin and his moustache. It could have been a lot worse (Adolf...)
Good luck in the contest
GMG
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2015
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Hello there,
This is a good entry into the pet competition.
I especially liked the little segment on Charlie Chaplin and his moustache. It could have been a lot worse (Adolf...)
Good luck in the contest
GMG
This rating does not count towards story rating or author rank.
The highest and the lowest rating are not included in calculations.
Comment Written 02-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2015
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You are right there! Thanks a lot for your review. Ulla
