Let's Talk Dirty!
Viewing comments for Chapter 49 "The Date From Hell"The story about three women who need to make money
38 total reviews
Comment from wordsfromsue
Seriously great chapter!
He left a generous tip on the table and helped Laura put on her Jacket, (Why is Jacket capitalized?)
What a slimy piece of excrement John turned out to be. Arrogant turdblossom.
I really enjoyed this chapter and was glad to see Laura walked away okay.
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2015
Seriously great chapter!
He left a generous tip on the table and helped Laura put on her Jacket, (Why is Jacket capitalized?)
What a slimy piece of excrement John turned out to be. Arrogant turdblossom.
I really enjoyed this chapter and was glad to see Laura walked away okay.
Comment Written 16-Jun-2015
reply by the author on 19-Jun-2015
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Well spotted, Sue. Now you must see why your reviews have been so helpful to me. Thank you my friend. Alexis xxx
Comment from reconciled
Alexisleech, ... okay great story.. never can be too careful.. she sure did keep her calm.. how many people make the wrong decision.... good story.. okay ... bug love... Michael
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2015
Alexisleech, ... okay great story.. never can be too careful.. she sure did keep her calm.. how many people make the wrong decision.... good story.. okay ... bug love... Michael
Comment Written 01-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2015
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Thank you for your review, Michael. Laura's new profession has taught her a lot!
Alexis x
Comment from w.j.debi
Your title caught my attention. How many of us have had those awful dates and this one was nearly terrifying. You built the tension well and painted John as a total creep. I was so glad that Laura got away. I hope that is the end of it since he kind of knows where she lives now and has her phone number. This could be a great first chapter to a stalker novel. Yikes!
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2015
Your title caught my attention. How many of us have had those awful dates and this one was nearly terrifying. You built the tension well and painted John as a total creep. I was so glad that Laura got away. I hope that is the end of it since he kind of knows where she lives now and has her phone number. This could be a great first chapter to a stalker novel. Yikes!
Comment Written 01-Mar-2015
reply by the author on 02-Mar-2015
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LOL, now there's an idea. In all fairness, Laura is also to blame because she broke the golden rule of not getting into a strangers car. This actually happened to me in 2012 when I joined a dating site at the age of 58, nearly three years after I was widowed. It certainly put me off dating sites for a while! Alexis x
Comment from patcelaw
This is an important and good that you left it as a stand alone chapter. I recently had a gentleman contact me on the internet. We e-mailed back and forth several times and each answered the others questions. He seem quite interested until my final e-mail to him. I told him my priorities in life were God, my family, and my home. Then I asked him if he had a problem with me being a born again Baptist. Apparently he did because I never heard another word from him.
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2015
This is an important and good that you left it as a stand alone chapter. I recently had a gentleman contact me on the internet. We e-mailed back and forth several times and each answered the others questions. He seem quite interested until my final e-mail to him. I told him my priorities in life were God, my family, and my home. Then I asked him if he had a problem with me being a born again Baptist. Apparently he did because I never heard another word from him.
Comment Written 28-Feb-2015
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2015
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Well, better to find out before you wasted any more time! I'm so glad you enjoyed the chapter, and thank you so much for your review. Alexis x
Comment from giraffmang
Hello there,
Internet dating indeed. I prefer flesh and blood myself, call me old fashioned but I think those keys would leave marks!
This was an 'enjoyable' read, if that is the right word for an experience like this.
Well written and accessible.
Nicely done
GMG
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2015
Hello there,
Internet dating indeed. I prefer flesh and blood myself, call me old fashioned but I think those keys would leave marks!
This was an 'enjoyable' read, if that is the right word for an experience like this.
Well written and accessible.
Nicely done
GMG
Comment Written 28-Feb-2015
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2015
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Me too! Thank you so much for your review.
Alexis x
Comment from abbasjoy
Well written and I really like the twist when she starts to pretend she is interested.
A man's ego certainly is fragile and can be so easily broken, while on the other hand it can be so inflated it can be sickening.
Laura's time on the chat line put her in a position that she became the one "in charge" instead of the victim. Good job, otherwise the story would have had a much different and very bad ending.
Good job!
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2015
Well written and I really like the twist when she starts to pretend she is interested.
A man's ego certainly is fragile and can be so easily broken, while on the other hand it can be so inflated it can be sickening.
Laura's time on the chat line put her in a position that she became the one "in charge" instead of the victim. Good job, otherwise the story would have had a much different and very bad ending.
Good job!
Comment Written 28-Feb-2015
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2015
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I can't thank you enough for the great review and the very complimentary six. You are absolutely right. Laura, who was a nervous recluse after she was widowed, has learnt to take control of a man through her chat line work, so it came in very useful! Alexis x
Comment from Ulla
Very good, an interesting read, and put Internet dating into perspective. I lived near Glasgow for many years, so makes it rather familiar. Can't see any major faults , and looking forward to read more. Well done. Ulla
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2015
Very good, an interesting read, and put Internet dating into perspective. I lived near Glasgow for many years, so makes it rather familiar. Can't see any major faults , and looking forward to read more. Well done. Ulla
Comment Written 28-Feb-2015
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2015
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Thank you again for your lovely review - I really appreciate it.
Alexis x
Comment from Wabigoon
alexis--
Thanks, I enjoyed this as much as one can enjoy such situations. This kind of dating would, I imagine, be scary. So far I have managed to avoid it and sure hope my luck continues.
I am delighted Laura escapes.
The story is well told and keeps the reader's attention. No typos I noticed.
I have no sixes.
Wabigoon
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2015
alexis--
Thanks, I enjoyed this as much as one can enjoy such situations. This kind of dating would, I imagine, be scary. So far I have managed to avoid it and sure hope my luck continues.
I am delighted Laura escapes.
The story is well told and keeps the reader's attention. No typos I noticed.
I have no sixes.
Wabigoon
Comment Written 28-Feb-2015
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2015
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I can't thank you enough for your encouraging review, and your reference to a six. Both are really appreciated.
Alexis x
Comment from donastell20
I reallly enjoyed reading this story. It was very interesting and easy to follow. It is also very true to life especially where the internet meetings turn out be someone completely unrecognisable from their details.
Very well written
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2015
I reallly enjoyed reading this story. It was very interesting and easy to follow. It is also very true to life especially where the internet meetings turn out be someone completely unrecognisable from their details.
Very well written
Comment Written 28-Feb-2015
reply by the author on 01-Mar-2015
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Thank you so much for taking the time to read and review this chapter. Alexis x
Comment from Crennan87
First, I loved this. What a twist! Second, I really enjoyed the dialogue between Laura and John. It was so easy, flowy, and believable. It wasn't forced; I genuinely felt like these were words real people might say on a first date (with awkwardness and insecurities!). John got terrifying really fast. The story turned from a quirky love story to a horror in the blink of an eye. I really enjoyed it.
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2015
First, I loved this. What a twist! Second, I really enjoyed the dialogue between Laura and John. It was so easy, flowy, and believable. It wasn't forced; I genuinely felt like these were words real people might say on a first date (with awkwardness and insecurities!). John got terrifying really fast. The story turned from a quirky love story to a horror in the blink of an eye. I really enjoyed it.
Comment Written 28-Feb-2015
reply by the author on 28-Feb-2015
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Thank you for your review, but can you tell me what adjustments are needed?
Alexis x
Fan Story guidelines;
Six Stars (Exceptional: Simply Outstanding)
Five Stars (Excellent: Enjoyable and no revisions needed)
Four Stars (Good: Adjustments needed)
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It was great, but I think it is just a personal preference. I felt like you often told instead of showed the reader what was going on. I found some of the beginning (around the time when they first meet) to just say a lot to the point that I got the feeling the character was talking to the reader, like Laura or John was trying to catch the reader up on information in order to proceed. I also didn't feel necessarily excited about Laura--I just didn't find her to be compelling. I really liked your story, but just for me personally, characters and character development are my favorite part of any story.
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Fair enough. That's not how we usually work here, because personal preference should never be reflected in a rating.