Let's Talk Dirty!
Viewing comments for Chapter 22 "Everything In Place"The story about three women who need to make money
12 total reviews
Comment from wordsfromsue
Another good chapter. I like reading the three main characters interacting with other people, not just each other.
By the way, what is lamping? I couldn't find the author notes you mentioned last chapter.
she decided on join one that not only had one of the (decided on 'joining' one.
Me thinks I shall call it a night! See you next chapter. :-)
reply by the author on 18-May-2015
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Another good chapter. I like reading the three main characters interacting with other people, not just each other.
By the way, what is lamping? I couldn't find the author notes you mentioned last chapter.
she decided on join one that not only had one of the (decided on 'joining' one.
Me thinks I shall call it a night! See you next chapter. :-)
Comment Written 16-May-2015
reply by the author on 18-May-2015
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I originally had it in the author's notes. Lamping is a way of catching rabbits. One person shines a lamp and the rabbit gets momentarily hypnotised by it. It then gets shot by a second person. It's still done in the UK when farms get overrun with rabbits. Thank you for all your help Sue. I hope you got a good night's sleep. You certainly deserve it! Alexis xxx
Comment from adewpearl
you depict Karen's inner thoughts about the relief and contentment she is feeling about her decision to do the phone sex chat line well
good detail about all that signing up, creating names, tax info, etc - I doubt most people think about any of that business stuff
their parent's workplace - parents' - plural possessive
good character development throughout
Brooke
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2015
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you depict Karen's inner thoughts about the relief and contentment she is feeling about her decision to do the phone sex chat line well
good detail about all that signing up, creating names, tax info, etc - I doubt most people think about any of that business stuff
their parent's workplace - parents' - plural possessive
good character development throughout
Brooke
Comment Written 02-Feb-2015
reply by the author on 03-Feb-2015
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Thank you so much for your helpful and encouraging review. Yes, there is a lot people don't understand about this business, as my research uncovered! Alexis x
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business is the key word - I think my impression was a common one, that the women doing it were just employees of some operator who had dozens of women answering calls and the women all just got paid by the hour. It never occurred to me that the women had to do all the business-related stuff you talk about. I figured they just signed up with the business owner and got paid. LOL
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I thought exactly the same until I bought 'How to Talk Dirty' by a woman who is now in her late fifties and making thousands a week. She now works for herself because she has such a huge following. Sometimes she's a seventeen year old in a gym slip, sometimes a granny, and she seems to enjoy every aspect of the job!
Comment from Margaret Snowdon
The chapter flew over far too quickly for me,
Alexis. They all seem happier now they've made
the decision to go ahead.
It must be so hard on the kids who have nowhere to play
todlers
toddlers
Margaret
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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The chapter flew over far too quickly for me,
Alexis. They all seem happier now they've made
the decision to go ahead.
It must be so hard on the kids who have nowhere to play
todlers
toddlers
Margaret
Comment Written 31-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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Thank you so much for catching that, Margaret. Your reviews are always appreciated, as are your eagle eyes! Alexis x
Comment from Sandra Stoner-Mitchell
Now this was a nice positive chapter in the lives of the three ladies. Now they had really decided to do it, they are feeling happier in themselves. I think they are going to have lots of laughs doing this too. Do you have to register your work with the tax-man?? How would you put down you job details? LOL. I can't wait to read how you write the first chat the girls have. I bet it will be hilarious! Great page, Alexis! :) Sandra
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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Now this was a nice positive chapter in the lives of the three ladies. Now they had really decided to do it, they are feeling happier in themselves. I think they are going to have lots of laughs doing this too. Do you have to register your work with the tax-man?? How would you put down you job details? LOL. I can't wait to read how you write the first chat the girls have. I bet it will be hilarious! Great page, Alexis! :) Sandra
Comment Written 31-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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That is going to be one of Karen's problems when she contemplates applying for a mortgage. Yes, the income is taxable, but who would want to admit to it! Don't worry, I have a plan... Alexis x
Comment from Walu Feral
G'day Alexis, great work mate. I feel bad for that little kid living in that place, that would be no fun at all. Now it seems that we are almost ready to go and I am wondering what is in that book she bought online. Anyway I am nervous about the interviews now. Cheers Fez
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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G'day Alexis, great work mate. I feel bad for that little kid living in that place, that would be no fun at all. Now it seems that we are almost ready to go and I am wondering what is in that book she bought online. Anyway I am nervous about the interviews now. Cheers Fez
Comment Written 31-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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I'm sure you, of all people would appreciate a young life that's less than perfect (normal!) Thank you, Fez, I really enjoy and appreciate your reviews. Alexis x
Comment from Curly Girly
This was an enjoyable chapter to read and I can see the story making progress.
There's something wrong here:
she didn't hesitated before turning on the kettle.
she did not hesitate before turning on the kettle.
A few suggestions:
Do a word search for: EVEN & VERY. These are unnecessary words.
Jax Franklin put me on to a great site which helps you pre-edit. I hope you try it out too. I've recently started using it, and it's excellent.
Open a new tab and key in: editminion.com
Then copy and paste one chapter into it and press start--hey, presto! You'll be sailing home with a merry smile! :) It's so helpful!
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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This was an enjoyable chapter to read and I can see the story making progress.
There's something wrong here:
she didn't hesitated before turning on the kettle.
she did not hesitate before turning on the kettle.
A few suggestions:
Do a word search for: EVEN & VERY. These are unnecessary words.
Jax Franklin put me on to a great site which helps you pre-edit. I hope you try it out too. I've recently started using it, and it's excellent.
Open a new tab and key in: editminion.com
Then copy and paste one chapter into it and press start--hey, presto! You'll be sailing home with a merry smile! :) It's so helpful!
Comment Written 31-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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I keep saving this review to answer because there is so much helpful advice, I want to save it all. This is just what I need to help with that difficult job of editing. Thank you for that and all the wonderful advice you give me on a daily basis. Alexis xxx
Comment from rwilliam
Great chapter!
For the first time since she made her life-changing decision the day before, she didn't hesitated before turning on the kettle. --did you mean... she didn't 'hesitate'?
After half an hour of checking them out online, she decided on join up to chat2me.com - this doesn't make sense. Are you trying to say.. After half an hour online, she decided to join chat2me.com ? This needs something.:-)
It was hard to believe that just a week ago, she'd had nothing to look forward too apart for her evening with Jenny and Karen. --OPS I think you mean..apart 'from' her evening with..
'Would to be okay if I use the photocopier and fax machine -OOPS I think you mean...Would 'it' be okay if I use the...
I really liked the ending. You pulled at my heart strings with the kids and not being able to play outside. The only English word she had spoken. Having more compassion and patience with the Patels. Great writing! :-D
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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Great chapter!
For the first time since she made her life-changing decision the day before, she didn't hesitated before turning on the kettle. --did you mean... she didn't 'hesitate'?
After half an hour of checking them out online, she decided on join up to chat2me.com - this doesn't make sense. Are you trying to say.. After half an hour online, she decided to join chat2me.com ? This needs something.:-)
It was hard to believe that just a week ago, she'd had nothing to look forward too apart for her evening with Jenny and Karen. --OPS I think you mean..apart 'from' her evening with..
'Would to be okay if I use the photocopier and fax machine -OOPS I think you mean...Would 'it' be okay if I use the...
I really liked the ending. You pulled at my heart strings with the kids and not being able to play outside. The only English word she had spoken. Having more compassion and patience with the Patels. Great writing! :-D
Comment Written 30-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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As usual, you have given me excellent advice. In fact, I rewrote the kettle switching on paragraph completely after you pointed out the spelling mistake because I looked at it with fresh eyes. I thought I'd better start introducing the Patels because they're going to be playing a big part later in the book and I didn't want it to look like a bad TV soap, then a story line just pops up from nowhere! Alexis x
Comment from MusingsOfMWH
This was very entertaining to read, and of course I'm rooting for your trio of Karen, Laura and Jenny. Your Author's Note, telling us there's only one chapter to go before the girls get started, is clever on your part to build our anticipation.
There were only two minor things which slowed me down a bit:
* ..she didn't hesitated before turning on the kettle.
* id should be ID or spelled out, in my opinion, because simply id makes me have a flashback from when I was told in Health class my id is the boorish, selfish side to my brain that is too much into immediate gratification. I suspect you may scratch your head a bit as to how id can provoke all that; sorry if I come across as an odd duck.
Anyway, for the most part, I found your post well-written, hence that five-star rating. All the best!
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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This was very entertaining to read, and of course I'm rooting for your trio of Karen, Laura and Jenny. Your Author's Note, telling us there's only one chapter to go before the girls get started, is clever on your part to build our anticipation.
There were only two minor things which slowed me down a bit:
* ..she didn't hesitated before turning on the kettle.
* id should be ID or spelled out, in my opinion, because simply id makes me have a flashback from when I was told in Health class my id is the boorish, selfish side to my brain that is too much into immediate gratification. I suspect you may scratch your head a bit as to how id can provoke all that; sorry if I come across as an odd duck.
Anyway, for the most part, I found your post well-written, hence that five-star rating. All the best!
Comment Written 30-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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I can't thank you enough for your excellent advice. I changed all the 'ids' to capitals and reworked the paragraph so it reads much better. This is exemplary of the help truly dedicated reviewers can give. Thank you! Alexis x
Comment from Spitfire
Umm, I'm thinking what if Patel gets off on phone sex, gets Jennie and recognizes her voice! I'm wondering what the downside of this job is. I like following the three girls in each read as long as it doesn't take a lot of time to read. Don't have much of it these days. The phone is ringing off the hook. LOL Back to business. :-)
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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Umm, I'm thinking what if Patel gets off on phone sex, gets Jennie and recognizes her voice! I'm wondering what the downside of this job is. I like following the three girls in each read as long as it doesn't take a lot of time to read. Don't have much of it these days. The phone is ringing off the hook. LOL Back to business. :-)
Comment Written 30-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 02-Feb-2015
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Now there's an idea! Unfortunately that spot has already been filled, and all I can say is Laura goes to church every Sunday... Lol, still don't know if I'm brave enough to use it! Alexis x
Comment from royowen
So Karen has sussed out a few websites and some names that appeal both to callers and have not been taken! It's going to be interesting where it goes from here, just ordinary housewives projected into the world of smutty telephone conversations, in Karen's case seemingly by necessity! Well done, well plotted, well written and engaging, well done, blessings, Roy.
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2015
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So Karen has sussed out a few websites and some names that appeal both to callers and have not been taken! It's going to be interesting where it goes from here, just ordinary housewives projected into the world of smutty telephone conversations, in Karen's case seemingly by necessity! Well done, well plotted, well written and engaging, well done, blessings, Roy.
Comment Written 30-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 31-Jan-2015
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Thank you so much, Roy. As a widow who had a happy, monogamous marriage for nearly thirty years, researching this subject has been a real eye opener! Alexis x
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Well done, blessings, Roy.
