Framed
Viewing comments for Chapter 39 "Daniel Andrews"A thriller set in Washington
5 total reviews
Comment from JanetRussek
Well, Bob. What in the world is gonna happen next? I'm anxious for Meredith. The suspense is killing me. Just had my coffee and going on to the next chapter.
Warm Regards,
Janet
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2015
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Well, Bob. What in the world is gonna happen next? I'm anxious for Meredith. The suspense is killing me. Just had my coffee and going on to the next chapter.
Warm Regards,
Janet
Comment Written 20-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 22-Jan-2015
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I'm going to be away for a week. My wife and I are taking a holiday and I don't think I'm allowed to take my computer. I might sneak it in to the case.
Comment from Dopeless Hopefiend
Well written! Suspenseful! Well done. It had me on the edge of my seat and I enjoyed being there! It was truly captivating, and you have immense talent as a story teller and descriptive writer (which your ranking on the site already suggested, but this confirms it!)
A fantastic write indeed. Thank you for sharing your imagination with us, and I look forward to more. Best wishes,
-D.H
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2015
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Well written! Suspenseful! Well done. It had me on the edge of my seat and I enjoyed being there! It was truly captivating, and you have immense talent as a story teller and descriptive writer (which your ranking on the site already suggested, but this confirms it!)
A fantastic write indeed. Thank you for sharing your imagination with us, and I look forward to more. Best wishes,
-D.H
Comment Written 19-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2015
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Reviews like this really make my day. Thank you for the encouragement you have provided.
Comment from Jay Squires
Bob, after another fine chapter, I find myself asking (without a hint of criticism)if there is an overriding goal of the protagonist, one he is working toward, and the possibility he won't attain it creates the plot tension. A lot may be the problem with posting on FanStory, but to be honest with you I don't know who the protagonist is. I've invested my caring for many of your characters, but no one character stands in my mind as the protagonist. Yet the plot continues on (in a very creative way, by all means), but without my seeing an end in sight. Do you see what I'm getting at?
Here are a few comments and concerns:
for him it had been betrayal. [If I understand it correctly, it WOULD HAVE been betrayal.]
The line had gone dead. Not so his memory [Beautiful concatenation!]
He dialled the number. [is "dialled" European/Australian spelling?]
'At this address we can change the world in forty seconds.' [A touch of Australian irony, eh Bob?]
many thousands of dollar spending visitors [...of dollar-spending... >> together they modify "visitors", but neither one alone does, so they have to be hyphenated.]
she saw three suburbans [Suburbans is Capped.]
Good chapter, Bob. Why can't they all just get along?
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2015
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Bob, after another fine chapter, I find myself asking (without a hint of criticism)if there is an overriding goal of the protagonist, one he is working toward, and the possibility he won't attain it creates the plot tension. A lot may be the problem with posting on FanStory, but to be honest with you I don't know who the protagonist is. I've invested my caring for many of your characters, but no one character stands in my mind as the protagonist. Yet the plot continues on (in a very creative way, by all means), but without my seeing an end in sight. Do you see what I'm getting at?
Here are a few comments and concerns:
for him it had been betrayal. [If I understand it correctly, it WOULD HAVE been betrayal.]
The line had gone dead. Not so his memory [Beautiful concatenation!]
He dialled the number. [is "dialled" European/Australian spelling?]
'At this address we can change the world in forty seconds.' [A touch of Australian irony, eh Bob?]
many thousands of dollar spending visitors [...of dollar-spending... >> together they modify "visitors", but neither one alone does, so they have to be hyphenated.]
she saw three suburbans [Suburbans is Capped.]
Good chapter, Bob. Why can't they all just get along?
Comment Written 18-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 19-Jan-2015
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The yet-to-be identified protagonist is a senior Pentagon employee. To date he has employed minions to carry out his tasks.
Your were correct, it should have read, would have. Dialed has twice had an L removed while dollar-spending had had a hyphen inserted. Suburbans have now been Capitalised.
With regard to 'change the world in forty seconds' that was meant to be a typical example of marketing hyperbole. I barely know what an iron is let alone irony.
Again I thank you and salute your great editorial skills. Must admit I had to check up on concatenation.
Comment from royowen
Well it looks like Daniel has been followed, as he suspected and as Meredith suspected Paslow was onto her, very clever plot, where did Meredith learn her undercover techniques from? Of course being in the position she was in, how could she not! It held me captive, this episode was brilliantly contrived Bob! Meanwhile where are all the others? I like the way you are tying the loose ends together Bob, brilliantly done, blessings, Roy.
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2015
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Well it looks like Daniel has been followed, as he suspected and as Meredith suspected Paslow was onto her, very clever plot, where did Meredith learn her undercover techniques from? Of course being in the position she was in, how could she not! It held me captive, this episode was brilliantly contrived Bob! Meanwhile where are all the others? I like the way you are tying the loose ends together Bob, brilliantly done, blessings, Roy.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2015
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Thank you Roy. This is about two thirds of the way into the novel. You are correct, all characters are drawing closer to each other. Only seventy pages, or about twenty posting to go.
Thank you again for all the positive feed back
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Well done, Bob
Comment from TOMORAL
This has got to be one of the best yet. Really like how you spin the suspense. Very well written, full of drama. I love how you always leave us hanging on a cliff, wondering what the next line will be. Excellent.
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2015
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This has got to be one of the best yet. Really like how you spin the suspense. Very well written, full of drama. I love how you always leave us hanging on a cliff, wondering what the next line will be. Excellent.
Comment Written 18-Jan-2015
reply by the author on 18-Jan-2015
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Every time I read a review from you I get goose bumps. Your constant praise humbles me. I'm fast running out of ways to express my thanks.
